Prior to July 4, 1776, not a single person in the world starved, got sick, worked hard for a living, or experienced any pain and anxiety. No one had ever been oppressed or unfairly exploited because the oppressive and unfair American system had not yet been created. Employment had been equally guaranteed to anyone who cared to work, along with an equal pay of exactly $1,000 a week regardless of outcome, occupation, or the geographical area.MORE >>
The glorious revolution in Seattle's CHAZ/CHOP is at an end. Evil capitalist "police" forces are taking control of the commune as we speak, in response to some -ahum- minor problems of the revolutionary government like robberies, rapes and a couple of murders.
Therefore, the Current Truth has been updated: CHAZ/CHOP was NOT real socialism! It was never real socialism! Next time when we try...MORE >>
Literally all Yul Brynner movies must be literally banned because Yul Brynner was literally Russian. He had no right to play any of the varuious ethnic characters.MORE >>
What began as a peaceful demonstration by Black Hawk pilots frustrated after years of being marginalized by Chinook pilots turned suddenly violent.
As crowds of aviators were shouting, "Justice for Igor Sikorsky!" a few broke away and began vandalizing CH-47s spray painting "Black Hawk Lives Matter!" on their fuselages...MORE >>
Have you seen the Nursing Home Killer? He is currently responsible for the deaths of 6,250 at-risk elderly patients after he knowingly sent COVID:19 patients to New York State's nursing homes instead of any of the far safer places where the pandemic would not have spread to the most vulnerable elderly.
New York had the USNS Comfort, the Jacob Javits Center, the $21million Red Hook Facility in Brooklyn...MORE >>
With nothing to look at, visitors are absolved of any grief in their lives. By peacefully meditating in the air where offensive art once stood, visitors can more efficiently process their own guilt, and decide whether that guilt should still be placed on other people (Answer: Yes.)
After looking at the financial statements, the museum board believes it is cheaper to run a museum with no exhibits ...MORE >>
The FBI Joint Terrorism Task Force investigating recent riots has confirmed the capture of a long-sought suspect who they believe is the instigator and spiritual leader of the nationwide operation.
Ernesto Guevara, better known as "Che," has been captured in a safe house in downtown Minneapolis. His identity was established by comparing his face to one of the Che T-shirts scattered around the house...MORE >>
When I was in 8th grade one of the books that was required reading was Heinlein's Tunnel in the Sky – about a group of high school kids that got stranded on an unihabited wild planet. It was Heinlein's answer to Golding's Lord of the Flies.
The kids, rather than devolving to a primitive state of affairs, managed to rise above that inclination BECAUSE they were able to draw on the lessons...
Events took an unexpected turn yesterday evening when a large crowd of Antifa and BLM activists descended on the "Al Qabal" mosque in downtown Seattle and burnt it to the ground.
The peaceful protesters were apparently provoked by certain passages in Islamic scripture that endorse slavery...
We've all heard about the Antifa collective who have seized six city blocks in downtown Seattle and are now trying to set up a collective farm there.
As a former Soviet citizen, I feel obligated to offer their leaders advice based on practical experience.
Since none of you know how to grow seeds into beets, make Mike Bloomberg your minister of agriculture...MORE >>
The Minneapolis City Council disband their Police Force, turning the city into a gang war zone.
The federal government surrounds it with a wall and starts using it as a maximum security prison.
Breaking out is impossible. Breaking in is insane.MORE >>
The Ayn Rand Center Israel contacted me after our publication of Mysterious stacks of bricks at riot sites
picture - but they asked if I could change the names of the bricks to corrupt philosophical concepts, ideologies, and personality traits. I altered the image; they made a donation to the People's Cube, and published it to illustrate their own coverage of the rioting.
But first I had suggested they send me a list of concepts arranged in the order of magnitude, and they proposed this hierarchy... MORE >>
Following the overwhelming positive response to the creation of "Black Lives Matter Plaza," Washington D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser has announced plans for further Progressive name changes.
Future changes include renaming a portion of Pennsylvania Ave "Arsonist Avenue" to honor these pioneers of radical urban renewal. A Section of New York Avenue will be designated "Looter's Lane"...MORE >>
Current Truth Update! Important! The war on Covid
has now been replaced with America has NEVER been at war with Covid.
Once we burn everything down, we'll demand a new lockdown and the Current Truth will be again, America has ALWAYS been at war with Covid.MORE >>
The recent social media trend of posting black squares engendered this deep thought: if we use a black cube instead of our vaunted red cube for at least 24 hours, it would eliminate all racism.
And tomorrow we'll say we already 'listened to' enough voices to make racism vanish, recycle the black cube, and go back to posting glamour selfies and stuff.MORE >>
Help the confused activist make the correct choice.
1) The Bible is Fiction OR
Not a Prop?
2) Looting by White Supremacists OR
It's Just Property?
3) Social Distancing OR
4) Call the Police OR
F*** the Police?
5) Human Life Valuable OR
6) America Founded by White Racists OR
Riots No Different than Boston Tea Party?
7) Think for Yourself OR
Silence is Consent?MORE >>
Peaceful protestor Liberty Valance joined this week's protests by burning down to the ground the frontier town of Shinbone and shooting to death everyone in the way of social justice, including the lawyer Ranse Stoddard, several cats, dogs and horses.
"I just wanted to draw attention to our oppressive system of law of systemic oppression that oppresses the system...MORE >>
According to reports, in cities around the US bricks are being delivered to riot locations and used to destroy property.
We decided to take a closer look and here's what we found.MORE >>
Riot logic is the belief that any superficial parallel can justify your emotional rage and point to your moral superiority.
Sound like fun? Well, you too can become a Social Media Puritan and an expert in Riot Logic! It's not hard, the less you think about it, the better. Here are some useful pro tips to guide you on your way to becoming the next SMP (trade secret - being White has certain advantages for SMPs)...MORE >>
A number of top national celebrities have taken time off from their important jobs of calling Trump Voters "Nazi!" to show their solidarity with the little people.
Patton Oswalt, Steve Carrell, Don Cheadle, and Seth Rogan lead a list of our betters who are donating their hard-earned money to bail out the AntiFa protesters arrested for simply minding their own business while setting fire to the store they just looted in their quest for justice and peace...MORE >>
Congratulations to Comrade Chedoh - today his story about Gov. Whitmer was debunked by Reuters.
I especially like that they listed his full credentials - "Chedoh, Kommissar of Viral Infections, Hero of Change, Prophet of the Future Truth".
If one skims through the Reuters article quickly, one may get the impression that it was our spoof that sparked protests...
As we all know, the State has decided to lovingly and gloriously redistribute $1200 to our lowly ration accounts.
Now is the perfect time to redistribute another People's Kube to yourself, or even an autographed copy of Shakedown Socialism or Hotel USSR. Doing so will remove copies of Anti-Kommunist books from bookstore shelves...MORE >>
There's a badass virus, bringing danger
Now everyone you see acts like a stranger
For only shopping's sake another chance you take
Fauci says we won't live to see tomorrow
Secret virus scam, secret virus scam
They've given it a number and COVID is its name...
LANSING, MI- Governor Gretchen Whitmer of Michigan took her already excessive restrictions in her state in the fight against Covid-19 a step further this morning when she announced that any violations of the executive order may authorize the use of lethal force by law enforcement.
The Michigan Governor stated, "If you think you can just go out and buy a bag of charcoal, think again....MORE >>
As all progressive humanity celebrates the Glorious 15th Anniversary of The People's Cube, we officially advise you to conduct spontaneous celebratory marches within at least six feet from one another in square formations. The Great Pandemic of International Coronavirus dictates that workers of the world must unite cautiously and without touching...MORE >>
We were minding our own business tonight, sharing our ration of beet vodka with comrades and not bothering anybody, when along came Facebook and blocked our access for 30 days - for something we posted more than four years ago, a spoof of CNN's Fareed Zakaria.
Far be it from us to accuse Facebook of blatant political bias, let alone of being petty, vindictive, and making no sense...MORE >>
Who would Joe Biden choose as his running mate? This question loomed ever since Biden became the apparent 2020 Democratic presidential nominee, and it was finally answered today.
Biden and his advisors were looking for a candidate with sufficient name recognition and the ability to bring down Donald Trump's presidency by canceling his crowded rallies and reducing his voter base...
We've got ourselves a nice crisis here, it would be a shame if something happened to it. In these glorious times, our foremost advice to all high-ranking Party members is to keep talking about the pandemic until Trump's presidency falls on its back and dies like the coronavirus victim that it is.
Since Trump's reelection depends on a strong economy, we must by all means paralyze all economic activity...MORE >>
Don't go on vacation or take cruises this spring break - you can find just as much water and sun in your local community if you know where to look.
As always around this time in election season, our Party's strength depends on how much fear and panic we can spread among the gullible population. To that end, we encourage all Party members to lead by example...MORE >>
Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders, who is threatening to defeat Joe Biden in the 2020 Democratic primary, has been offered an exorbitant advance in a book deal that puts to shame the meager $575,000 vacation home he had bought after conceding to Hillary Clinton in 2016, sources say.
Tentatively titled Das Krapital
, the book is going to be a compilation...MORE >>
To all oppressed persons of gender:
All GENITALS BELONG TO THE STATE!MORE >>
Brought to you by Americans for Sex Change and Society For Advancement Of Secondary Sexual Characteristics
Having just received a sort of notice in the mail which contained 2,500 good reasons to vote for Bloomberg, I'm here to tell you that I'm all in for Mike.
First of all, Mike is smarter than you. And me. You see, any ordinary schlock could be you or me, but it takes gray matter to be Mike. You may only be a doctor, a veteran, an emergency responder, or just a farmer. Anybody can do that. Mike has gray matter, lots of it...MORE >>
A lot can be learned about a person by how they maintain their household and especially with regard to their personal hygiene practices.
One can only learn so much from documents such as tax returns and each candidate's professional resume (CV). We needed more personal papers.
So we sent our reporter - disguised as a plumber - behind the scenes...
He said "kill it" to his pregnant employee as a condition to her further employment, but these words can be applied more broadly, to encompass all his campaign promises on global warming, gun control, abortions, taxes, and soda drinks.If you can't regulate it, kill it. If you can't kill it, buy it. If you can't buy it, steal it.MORE >>
Correct me if I'm wrong, but my Joe Biden theory is confirmed more and more every day. Let's start from the beginning.
At first Biden is reluctant to run. But in the spring of 2019 he gets wind of Trump investigating his corruption in Ukraine - and he immediately enters the race on 4/25/19. On the trail he looks old, tired, and his heart just isn't in it. Why do it then? Because it's about a lot more things than simply running for president...MORE >>
Dating a dictator can be a scary and dangerous endeavor. But it also offers an opportunity to meet the authoritarian oppressor of your dreams, provided that the proper precautions are taken. Whether you are a young starry-eyed Utopian or have been around the eastern bloc for a while, everyone can benefit from these tips and guidelines for safe dictator-dating procedures...MORE >>
For those who have discovered The People's Cube only recently: we have been following Rush Limbaugh very closely throughout the years and have compiled an impressive Rush Dossier, detailing his many exploits.Rush Limbaugh Hails the People Cube's Editorial Cartoon
"It's a great, great, great cartoon because this is how libs see America today"...MORE >>
Responding to criticism that its initial diversity version of Moby Dick was merely a "fish tale in blackface", Barnes and Noble vowed to radically restructure Melville's pondersous tome
Too begin with, the whale will no longer be a neutral symbol of unstoppable, remorseless nature. Rather, it will be recast as a sort of immense guardian whale shepherd who protects the more vulnerable members...
In a historic speech delivered with emotion in his voice, Senator Mitt Romney announced Wednesday that he would publicly cut off his nose to spite the face. The Utah senator is the only Republican who has responded to this latest Democratic challenge.
Speaking on the floor of the Senate, Romney said he hated his Republican face ever since the 2012 election..MORE >>
Lead House Impeachment Manager Congressman Adam Schiff of California stated during closing arguments in the Senate trial that he had irrefutable proof President Trump was going to give Alaska back to the Russians.
He had learned about it just an hour ago, Schiff claimed, from an anonymous whistleblower who approached him during lunch. He was wearing a brown paper bag over his head...MORE >>
One Wheel of Fortune contestant lost out on some major prize money on Thursday night when he failed to recognize a name he was intimately familiar with.
Adam Schiff, who was playing alongside fellow Democratic House Managers during the impeachment trial, was the leader heading into the last round. But his guesses left some viewers confused. ...MORE >>
Sometimes we follow other people's advice at our own peril, especially if they advise us about matters they have no knowledge of. This happened to several people who watched a recent interview of congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, in which she revealed the dirty, capitalist-pig secret of how to become a billionaire.
"No one makes a billion dollars, they take a billion dollars," she said...MORE >>
Comrade Schiff dazzled dozens of CNN viewers by deftly quoting the Founding Fathers in the well of the Senate. His timely references to Lenin were heartwarming to this news reporter:
- There are no morals in politics; there is only expedience. A scoundrel may be of use to us just because he is a scoundrel.
- The press should be not only a collective propagandist and a collective agitator...
In a recent stump speech, current Democrat frontrunner Bernie Sanders addressed the growing crisis of loneliness in America. "Being lonely is a violation of the right not to be lonely," declared Senator Sanders, adding that loneliness was the result of "the tyranny of the patriarchal, white supremacist, capitalist system creating too many opportunities for individual choices."MORE >>
In what was destined to be the worst terrorist event in our nation's history, people's hero, Ralph Northam stepped up to the plate and prevented mass anarchy and bloodshed. News cameras captured several incidents of white gun owners arm in arm with black gun owners, protesters menacingly waving placards, gun owners picking up trash, and other violent episodes at the white supremacy rally held yesterday in Richmond.
Meghan Markle is the quintessential empowered Progressive woman. She not only cares, but she tirelessly travels the world raising awareness of how much she cares about all the issues that matter—and like every empowered Progressive woman, she has the uncanny ability to make an issue out of anything and everything. She's a strong woman of independent thought if not means...MORE >>
Meghan Markle's husband is running away from home with her to an uncertain future as an abused, cuckolded, gaslit house-husband in Canada.
He has given up the only thing he is known for and has no identifiable job skills.
Meghan has returned to the ornament 8-month old child they left behind in Canada...
When will it stop, comrades? When will the War Criminal Trump, who stole the election with Russian help from Ukraine, be stopped from repeatedly starting World War III?
From the earliest days of his illegal presidency, the War Criminal Trump has been a loose cannon in foreign affairs, destroying the carefully crafted diplomatic matrix that has sustained an acceptable level of terrorism on a global scale...MORE >>
There must be some bitter rivalry in the prog-media's terrorist eulogy sector. "Austere scholar," "most revered," and now this.
This passionate Soleimani eulogy in the New Yorker reads like a romance novel. I looked it up and indeed, it was authored by someone who seems to be a vulnerable woman with the hots for brutal Islamic strongmen. Robin Wright is the New Yorker's eminent expert on Iran...MORE >>
A Trump era remake of the Benghazi story '13 Hours' has just finished filming in Baghdad. Titled '13 Minutes,' it chronicles the short period from when the U.S. Marines landed at our Baghdad embassy to when the Iran-backed militias ran away losing their sandals.
Starring John Krasinski and such crowd pleasers as Apache helicopters, the remake is admittedly much more enjoyable than the Obama-era original...MORE >>
Former president Obama, known as an avid reader of books that other people only buy to decorate their interiors with, continued his tradition of releasing a list of his favorite books of the year, all so the rest of us would know which titles we should put on our coffee tables while pretending we have read and liked them.
As always during this festive time of year, an email from a trusted Soros-funded source informed our former presidentt...MORE >>
How did the ancient mass media report the alleged birth of Christ? The People's Cube prepared the following compilation of quotes from the Roman and Judean sources, which should help our readers to form an unbiased opinion of what really happened in the days surrounding the so-called Christmas.MORE >>
I'm happy to report that I've just published my second book, Hotel USSR
. It's a story of а young man coming of age in a totalitarian state. He wants to be an artist but he isn't authorized to buy paints. He wants to see the world but the authorities brand him as politically unreliable. He wants to get married but the system separates him from his bride. He listens to Hotel California
and wishes he had their problems: he himself is stuck in a real-life trap that he "can never leave," and he calls it Hotel USSR. To check out, he must break every rule in the book.MORE >>
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