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North Korean Voters Unanimous: We Are The 100%!

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In a devastating counterpunch to all deniers and non-believers, North Korea's supreme leader Kim Jong Un has won an unparalleled victory today, being re-elected with 100% votes and 100% turnout, which gives him an undisputed mandate to fundamentally transform his country into an even more democratic people's republic.

In the United States, the Democratic Party leadership, its party organs, and the Obama-voting precincts all around America are congratulating North Korea today on achieving the same results as they did in 2012 presidential election of Dear Leader with 100% vote and 100% turnout, accompanied by assurances of international solidarity of all voters worldwide.

According to USA Today, "Voters in the election have no choice who to vote for - there is only one candidate's name on the ballot for each district. Instead, they have the choice of voting yes or no, and according to official accounts virtually all choose yes. North Korea also typically puts turnout nationwide at over 99%."

This finally clarifies what the phrase "We are the 99%" really means. But that was last year. Today, being 99% is no longer an option - we must eliminate the remaining 1% and become the 100% - like in North Korea!

It is mandatory for all comrades to celebrate today's glorious victory by ordering our commemorative T-shirts and other merchandise, which will empower you to express your solidarity with North Korean voters, as well as your commitment to progress and contempt for deniers.

UPDATE

12/1/2020

This story aged well.

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Click on the images to go to the store!

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WE ARE THE 100%! 100% VOTE, 100% TURNOUT!


Only 100%?? Sheesh! Barry can do much better than that!

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Actually, many voting districts in our own 2012 elections had more than 100% voter turnout and votes for Obama, including a few districts in my own state. So America is still Number One. (Oh dear, that was exceptionalist, wasn't it? I denounce myself.)

M84
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Dear Leader's home area of Chicago can boast 500% turnout! Not even death deters the Chicago voter! Eat that, North Korea!

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M84 wrote:Dear Leader's home area of Chicago can boast 500% turnout! Not even death deters the Chicago voter! Eat that, North Korea!
Obviously what's holding Kim Jong Un back from equaling The One™, our very own Barack Husseinovich Obama, is that KIM JONG UN DOESN'T LET HIS DEAD RELATIVES VOTE AFTER THEY'RE EATEN BY DOGS!

Comrades, let me put it bluntly - what kind of equality is that?

HappyDog.jpg

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100% turnout? I'm sure there must have been some who were unable to vote due to being in labor camps on vacation.

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Voter turnout only 100%? Should be more than that! You mean to tell me that no one voted twice?

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A "voter option guide" made the rounds prior to the vote. Show up at the polls with a bad attitude-20 to 40 years in prison , if you live that long.Trying to vote for someone other than Dear Leader, ballot is destroyed, loss of voting for life, firing squad in the morning. Dear Leader is merciful and will allow nobody in prison for a silly mistake. Any ballot received was assumed to be for DL Kim,
Got it?

M84
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I believe the DNC is planning such a guide for the next American elections.

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North Korea Documentary - How Americans Live Today, Survive By Eating Birds And Snow




A new release on North Korea Documentary Televisoin today, showing how Americans live and how many of them have to eat snow and birds to survive.

        Mystery item No. 1

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Does the narrator seem to be mocking the American way of life, or am I missing something? If he's mocking us, then why pick such a prosperous location to film? Stupid.

Well...I don't know about you, but I'm going to find out where this news footage was taken and pack right away. Those free Korean cakes and cups of hot snow look mighty tasty!

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100% ?!? wtf? I thought it was Un Percent ™

mi
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Eew... 100% is so last millennium. The last Dear Leader to do this was Saddam Hussein, peace be upon him...

Nowadays the participation must exceed 100% (the way sinus and cosinus functions may exceed 1 with proper treatment).

Korea's leadership still has a lot to learn from President Putin, peace be upon him, for example, who has just recently achieved a 123% voter turn-out in Sevastopol -- all of them voting to join Russia, of course.



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Only 100%? Pshaw, we have done better than that.


 
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