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Capital One forms unilateral partnership with People's Cube

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This week Capital One has established a new unilateral partnership with the People's Cube, with the purpose of creating catchy and spectacular advertising materials. The first rule in such a unilateral partnership is that one partner doesn't let the other partner know anything about it. The second rule is that the other partner doesn't get any of the proceeds from the resulting revenues.

In practical terms that means that Capital One produces their ads based on the People's Cube material, and we at the People's Cube find out about it on Facebook from an alert reader who sends us a link.

The first ad resulting from our exciting new partnership with Capital One features a gloriously red People's Cube on a rough wooden surface, under the caption, "It just got easy."

We can only guess what the next Capital One ad will be, but we expect our members to post their suggestions in what may become a very productive and successful unilateral partnership with Capital One.

On our part, laborers at various People's Cube departments have already enthusiastically signed different kinds of improvised one-sided contracts with Capital One, many of them in triplicate and notarized in red pencil, stating that they don't want to hear anything about Capital One using their work, demanding that they never be contacted by Capital One representatives, nor receive any compensation for their selfless toil for the Common Good™ in the field of visual agitation and propaganda.

We have scheduled a spontaneous celebration of this historic development at 21:00 behind the tractor barn. Many a rationing coupon is expected to be redeemed tonight to ensure an uninterrupted flow of beet vodka, stale bread, and pickled beet products. And by all means, bring your own beets!

This looks like the beginning of a beautiful unilateral friendship.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Cube_Capital_One_Ad_FB.jpg[/img]

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It takes a special kind of stupid in this day and age to try this.


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[img]/images/Capital_One_Marx_Wallet.jpg[/img]

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What's in your wallet must be redistributed to each according to his needs.
Those Delta miles will really add up now. Guaranteed equal billing for all customers.


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Das Kapital One: what's a wallet?

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The Obama administration saw this and wants to form a partnership with The People's Cube too. They want us to help them regain the lost magic of 2009 with an advertising campaign for their new Department of Imagination:

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I wanted to make a picture of the bearded Karl Marx as a Capital One viking, but instead I made this:

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I really have nothing to add, but wanted to post a comment so I'd feel like one of the boys.

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Ok, i seriously want a Das Kapital One card with the cube in the lower right corner. That is just awesome. If only I could get a bank to buy off on that I would proudly use it for all my beets purchases.

I don't know how practical it is, but I think that might be a good idea for The People's Dry Goods. We'd have to invent a number that is significant, maybe the number of people that have been gloriously liberated from breathing by strong Communism; but it would be fun to carry. And it would have just a much purchasing power as the average Soviet Citizen circa 1940, or today's working American.

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I received my first credit card from Oleg a week after I signed up.
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I assumed everyone had a CubeOne
credit card!
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Comrade Putout wrote:.

I received my first credit card from Oleg a week after I signed up.
.
I assumed everyone had a CubeOne
credit card!
.


I am new to the Kollective and would like to receive my own prestigious Commie Card. If I apply for a CubeOne™ credit card, will I have option to choose my favorite Progressive™ leader and have his face put on the card? It would be nice to carry around a picture of Dear Leader and see his face when I purchase beets!

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DAS KAPITAL ONE FORMS UNILATERAL PARTNERSHIP WITH ISLAM



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Join the Debt Revolution! Build your OWN 17+ Trillion!Image

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I would like to see The Peoples' Card™ become the new EBT; to replace food stamps and other burdensome impediments to redistribution; and be another plastic mechanism for hope and change, without the wallet. No pesky bills since the guvmint is picking up the tab.

And imagine the cute phrases and jingles:

  • "Vacation on The Peoples' dime with The Peoples' Card™!"
  • "Show your true color with The Peoples' Card™"
  • "Doubles as a race card!"
  • and of course "Don't leave Mexico without it!" [There is a place for American <spit> Express if they want to complain about that last one].
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By popular demand... Apply now and your neighbor gets the bill. It's not his money anyway!

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  • Show your true color with The Peoples' Card™
  • Vacation on The Peoples' dime
  • Doubles as a race card
  • Don't leave Mexico without it!

(Ushanka tip to Anyer Marx)


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Image This was a real credit card offered by a German bank a few years' back.
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Prompting me to tweet:
  • Engel's couch to sleep on : 0 Marks
  • Bribes for the usual suspects: 5,000 Marks/year
  • Funding worldwide revolution: 6,000, 000 Marks
  • Winning the cold war 20 years after everyone thought you'd lost it: PRICELESS!!!


 
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