Comrades! I have discovered our glorious Chairman O has a new book out. Naturally got one as soon as possible. It is called Pocket Obama and is filled with quotations from the Dear Leader. It will go great with your copy of Chairman Mao's Little Red Book.

Get your today from Amazon.com.

URL:


This is the most disturbing thing I have seen in a long time.

"a primer for readers who want to [HIGHLIGHT=#ffff00]examine the substance of his thought [/HIGHLIGHT]and reflect on the next great chapter in the American story"

That will be a quick read. Barack Obama, an American tragedy.

What a glorious duplicate thread! https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=2834 Truly this is a matter that bears being made a sticky, so that we may all be reminded of the Little Blue Book ™. We must end our posts now with an Obama quote, to show our devotion to Dear Leader Obama.

"Was that me?" after breaking wind in bed, while plotting how to compel banks to loan money to people who normally couldn't get a loan.

{out of karakter} This is either VERY tongue in cheek marketing, or very, very, very disturbing.

Comrade7.62 wrote: {out of karakter} This is either VERY tongue in cheek marketing, or very, very, very disturbing.

(out of character)

This is Obama we're talking about here. It's almost certainly the latter. He is a Communist, why would he not copy from another?

Comrades, you'll notice that it is made by Kleenex and has dual purpose. Never be without it.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Comrades, you'll notice that it is made by Kleenex and has dual purpose. Never be without it.

Now Chris Matthews et al need not use manual dexterity to obtain that tingle on the leg. Just place Pocket Obama in the pocket and Presto! That tingle has become a flood. The only side effect is that the brain becomes devoid of blood in the process. Oh well, better a useless organ be deprived of oxygen than one that is needed.

At least the book should be easy on the environment:
A little preview, Comrades

Page 1: HOPE

Page 2: CHANGE

Page 3: YES WE CAN!

Page 4: I WON!!!!!!

Page 5: The end.

Think how many trees we'll save if we reduce the size of the font and print it all on one page!

-OV

Amazon is offering a free preview.

Opiate wrote: The only side effect is that the brain becomes devoid of blood in the process. Oh well, better a useless organ be deprived of oxygen than one that is needed.

Opiate, I HOPE that you are not going to write off Chris Matthews' brain--blood needs to go to it so that he can be a brain donor, and even before he is dead. His brain would not of course serve the donor well but could be used as a stop-gap measure until a real brain, such as a monkey's is found.

156 pages. I checked the Amazon "Look Inside" feature. Apparently each quotation/speech excerpt, of no more than one or two sentences, gets its own page--a format which only serves to highlight how stupid and meaningless are the things that dribble out of his mouth.

It's like a bag of fortune cookies without the cookies.

Andrew Ferguson, an elegant writer whose work I've been following for decades, wrote an article in <i>The Weekly Standard</i> some months ago before the candidates had sashayed down the primary catwalk. He reviewed their campaign books.

He said His O'liness's first book that it was one of the best of a now-defunct genre--memoirs of thirtysomethings. But his second book, a real campaign book, Ferguson didn't are for. His most telling line, something like, "It's not good value to trade a good writer for a politician."

Having these predigested gobbets of animist and PC Hallmark-speak collected like this supports the assumption that he is no more than a cult figure. What happened? If Andy Ferguson is to be believed, and I think that he is, this is more frightening than if he had never had anything. He threw it away.

Even BBC America is having a show on His Eminence, our "flagging economy" (and theirs is in the shitter's shitter, and, get ready for it, Global Warming. Jeez. The Beeb is poison now.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:

156 pages. I checked the Amazon "Look Inside" feature. Apparently each quotation/speech excerpt, of no more than one or two sentences, gets its own page--a format which only serves to highlight how stupid and meaningless are the things that dribble out of his mouth.

It's like a bag of fortune cookies without the cookies.

Haven't gotten my Cone fixed yet so I borrowed everyone's favorite talking horse.

That's hilarious, Comrade!! Maybe we could put these in the store:

http://www.fancyfortunecookies.com/original.shtml

-OV

Amazon's Product description wrote:This is the little blue book that right-wing partisans love to hate. Printed in a size that easily fits into pocket or purse, POCKET OBAMA is an anthology of quotations borrowed from Barack Obama's speeches and writings, intended to keep the momentum going for those inspired by his message of hope and change. The portable book serves as a reminder of the remarkable ability of this man to move people with his words, a primer for readers who want to examine the substance of his thought and reflect on the next great chapter in the American story. His captivating oratory has earned comparisons to John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King, and this collection presents words that catapulted his remarkable rise to the American Presidency and set a true course for the future. Includes themes of democracy, politics, war, terrorism, race, community, jurisprudence, faith, personal responsibility, national identity, and above all, his hoped-for vision of a new America. POCKET OBAMA is essential reading as we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin the work of remaking America.

Hagiography pure and simple.

How can one possibly lampoon the servile toady who wrote that?

I wrote that book. Before it appeared in hard copy it existed on the Webas a product of the People's Groupthink. Life imitates the Cube!

1. Every now and then, Obama opens his eyes and the world springs into existence.
   
2. When a tree falls in the forest, Obama hears it.
   
3. Obama can clap with one hand.
   
4. Prometheus was punished for plagiarizing Obama.
   
5. Obama can make a journey of a thousand miles without a single step.
   
6. Socks worn by Obama are used for climbing walls in Spiderman movies.
   
7. Hillary Clinton dropped out of the race when she learned Obama's true name.
   
8. "Obama" is the very first word in the English language to be a verb, adjective, noun, pronoun, adverb, interjection, superlative and pronad. (Pronad is a new category made specifically for the word "Obama" so its power can be fully realized).
   
9. When Obama squints dreamily into the distance, he can see next week's lottery winning numbers. But he never plays because that would mean poverty of ambition.
   
10. Obama can calculate your guilt just by looking at the numbers in your checkbook.
    
11. A microphone into which Obama has spoken, heals asbestos-related disorders and colorectal cancer by direct application.
    
12. Every time Obama talks about change, a baby diaper becomes clean and a homeless person's cup fills up with nickels.
    
13. Every time Obama talks about "hope," coma patients regain consciousness and chant "We are the ones we've been waiting for."
    
14. Obama's famous stare once converted 15 Islamic fundamentalists into secular progressives, all of whom are currently employed by Countrywide Home Loans.
    
15. Obama is 50% typical White person.

<br>There's more...

One reviewer wrote:I used to be troubled by sleepless nights. But reading in bed this collection of the wisdom of President Obama -- e.g., "The true test of the American ideal is whether we're able to recognize our failings and then rise together to meet the challenges of our time. Whether we allow ourselves to be shaped by events or history, or whether we act to shape them" -- has enabled me to awake each morning refreshed and ready to serve Chairman Obama.

Another reviewer wrote:Praise be Obama!!

I was sitting upon my lovely abode and couldn't take a dump!! Oh no! Alas, I reached behind me in haste to palm one of my many copies of the Obamible and I got instant relief!!

Edit: Update!!

I got caught for criminal negligent speeding and whipped out my trusty pocket pass and voila!! Pass granted!! Woo hoo!! Thanks Obama!

Comrade Commissar Theocritus-

I greatly appreciate you quoting the reviewers. I'll have Comrade Al Gore trace the IP addresses of the posters, send Comrade Red Star to go pick them all up and bring them to me, and I'll have the solution of my little problem of how to build Platform S-21 with a mere 8 billion dollars, as well as who to test out all my new "strategies" on...

Yours in CHope,

OV

Vodkavich, my old socialist eyes tear over at your devotion to the party. I haven't been so moved since I realized that since I was an important socialist that rules didn't apply to me. Primus inter pares, you know.

Although I am beginning to wonder if we have a problem with Amazon. They deliberately suppressed negative reviews of Comradette Nansky's book--well, a lot of them. There weren't many positive ones and they were obvious shills. But nothing is too good for dear Nansky. After all today she told us that every month without spending trillions of dollars means that 500,000,000 million people lose their jobs. My word. That's 2/3 more people than there are in America. I had no idea that she was planning on air-lifting in China.

But the two reviews that I quoted <i>were the first two reviews</i>! Those are the ones that are supposed to be suppressed.

A horrible thought. Do you think that Steve Bezos has hired people who are not orgasmically tied, like the BBC, to His O'liness and actually have not cut out their brains and put them in the Insinkerator?

Surely not.

And as long as we're on the subject of great words spoken by The One, is it just me, or has anyone else noticed that his ravings this past week about the dire need to pass his "stimulus bill" sound a lot--in fact, almost word for word--like the stuff we've heard from Al Gore in recent years?

How often have we heard Gore rant that the planet is in crisis, and if we don't take action and do something right fricking now, the crisis will become a catastrophe lasting years, from which the planet and ultimately humanity may never recover?

It's as if the Left (like we didn't already know this) works out of the same old, dog-eared, fill-in-the-blank playbook. Erase the blanks where Gore penciled in "planet" and replace them with "economy."

And OV: Yes, I like the fortune cookie idea. We could also include the Progressive proverbs currently being collected over on the Current Truth forum. I propose assigning this project to Che Gourmet.

A tried-and-true method of getting power is (1) cite a horrifying scenario; (2) say that you are the solution and (3) if people don't acknowledge that the worst will happen and (4) therefore give me money and power, which is the same thing.

I used to give money to the Heritage Foundation--they did good work making an ethical instead of pragmatic case for lower tax rates. It's just not <i>right</i> to have progressive income tax. And that was then I was paying salaries on borrowed money. But I got a letter, with yellow interlineations and marginalia, shouting about the "homosexual agenda" and how except for them your furniture would be rearranged. Well, since the fall of the Berlin Wall, that's the only drum they can bang except an intellectual drum and although I respond to intellectual drums they're easily ignorable. I roasted Ed Fuelner after that. But having friendly fire, so to speak, made me recognize the pattern.

(1) The world as we know it is coming to an end.
(2) I know what to do.
(3) You have to trust me to fix it.
(4) I need your money/consent/power to do it.

It's worked always. Savaronola, and every crackpot soapbox preacher. And this is just more of the same.

{microphone off}
I will offer this quote which I saved from about 10 years ago. One can easily infer where Obama fits in the pattern....

There is a long tradition of intellectual snobbery directed against American Presidents. The East Coast said that Abraham Lincoln was just a hick lawyer from the sticks; Franklin Roosevelt was considered a playboy, as was John Kennedy; as Alistair Cooke observed yesterday, Harold Macmillan thought Dwight Eisenhower “woefully uneducated”; Harry Truman was called a “bankrupt haberdasher”, as indeed he had been; the Ivy League treated Ronald Reagan with a sublime mixture of condescension and distaste. The three 20th-century Presidents to have been treated with the greatest intellectual respect were Herbert Hoover, Richard Nixon and Bill Clinton. If the test is success in office, then one should go for the hicks and the simpletons every time.

-William Rees-Mogg

Opiate, I'm proud to be an intellectual. Because intellectuals think of how the world ought to be and then they refuse to acknowledge anything which contradicts their view of it. And everything must conform. That's why so many intellectuals, in old age, tired of a reality which ignores them, say, "Oh hell, let's get out the goons."

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:


It's like a bag of fortune cookies without the cookies.

If that's the case, the quotes can only be enhanced by saying, "Beneath the sheets" before reading them, or "in my pants" afterward.

"Beneath the sheets, we are the ones we've been waiting for."

"Keep your tires inflated in my pants."

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:And OV: Yes, I like the fortune cookie idea. We could also include the Progressive proverbs currently being collected over on the Current Truth forum. I propose assigning this project to Che Gourmet.

If they were available in The People's Dry Goods Store, I'd order some fo shizzle!

-OV

However, THIS is available at the PPPX:

Now I understand why the PPPX accepts "favors".

-OV

I've got mine! Also, I've got orders from the Inner Party, I'm to give away a small shipment to the local prols.

"On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord."
-B Hussein O

"A letter to His O'liness from a faithful servant:

Naw, sir master Obama. Wez us did gather hur 'cos we wanna see how many magical ways you cuh say dem words like "change," and "hope." But I do gots a purpose, Your Obamaness; me and muh sister wants tah get married and since uz gonna let girlz marry girlz, and Pamela Anderson's gonna marry that Peter guy.. or was it Peta? PETA?

What was I talkin' about, sir?

Oh, right...

Iz feelin unified all ready, cus I got me a purpose. And dat there purpose is a check with my name on it from dos people u told me thought they was better cus they aint livin in a trailer that I bought with another check that-

What was I talkin' about, sir?

Its real complicated tryin to keep all my thoughts together and such.

Anywhoo, on behalf of muh sister and our daughter, Michelle (named after your purdy wife), I wants tah thankya for thinkin for me and speakin wit all dem enchanted words and enforcing all these special rules yer makin'. And if you get around to it, since uz so busy fightin all those edjeecated salary lovers (i ain't wantchu thinkin iz like them), couldja maybe get 'round to sending my daughter Michelle one of those special animals yer about to save from out thur in the wilderness? I got just duh perfect cage for dat mouse dey sayvin! I think Iy name 'em B.O. after you, master!

Only problem wit dat is big stinky B.O is gon' be runnin' all 'round ma house creatin' all types a messes and shittin' on my carpet. I guess it wouldn't bother me so much if little Michelle weren't such a damn eye-sore.

Iz forgetted what my point was, Sir. But Iz sure you'll let me know when one a yer slaves writes me a grand letter.

Forever yours,
Jed-Ray Dean (me), Bertha my Ma, Betsy-Jo muh sister/fiance, Michelle the eye-sore, Hank ma steed. AR-15 sends his regards from the grave, may he rest in duh peace.

A good friend of mine sent that letter to The Great Master, and I thought it was worth sharing so you all could see how influential Obama has been, and will be. So profound are his words, it is my proposal that he writes his own constitution, since the one we use now was written by a bunch of old men hundreds of years ago. Heck, it isn't even culturally relevant. We don't need to govern ourselves or have any of those silly rights or freedoms when we have someone as strong as B.O. looking after us! And the HOPE he has instilled in the masses... especially that of Jed's simple minded family. To think, they tried to think for themselves at one point? How completely against the Obama-initiative!

Obamaman, Obamaman... la la la.

Fraulein Alyssa

I HOPE he writes back!

He will write back every hundred years as Brigadoon descends to earth.

That does not mean that we shall not see his smiling puss on every television channel though. Did you know that Dish Network actually had a BO channel? So great was the influence of His O'liness that your DVR was filled with recordings of his smiling puss, wiping out the ones that you yourself had scheduled.

And thus do we march into the cult of personality of the new world.

I'm sorry to say I missed that cultural blessing. I used to be shallow, not thinking of the greater good, and instead toiling away at class and work. BO has chaaaanged me with his unparalleled rhetoric. Now if only I could figure out how to work this damned computer...

AL GORE,

IF YOU'RE OUT THERE I COULD REALLY USE YOUR COMPUTER EXPERTISE!

Frau

Fraulein, the Holy Gore did not every actually learn to use a computer. That's for proles and stenos. The concept of the Internet sprang, fully formed, from his forehead, like Minerva from the head of Jupiter, when he found it difficult to work a telephone with more than 12 buttons. Two lines=confusing.

The Holy Gore was intent on getting a method for circumventing the Pendleton Bill, which prohibits soliciting campaign donations on federal property. He thought, "How convenient to shake down everyone by pressing return. Or having some serf press return." The people wouldn't be on federal property and so it would be all right. This is the defense he used when he, from the VP mansion, was coercing people to give money. "My voice came out of the telephone in another state."

I do not know why the Holy Gore feels constrained to be bound by laws. After all, every time he gives a speech about global warming people freeze their nads off.

Wait Commissar, are u insinuating something about global warming? There is damning evidence that ice is melting, and grass is showing in places previously covered by snow. There are charts and scared farmers and ... the man used charts for PETA's sake! I bet you think you can leave the lights on all day, don't you? Like you aren't burning a hole RIGHT THROUGH the ozone layer that's protecting us from utter obliteration. MAN you are so ignorant. I bet your carbon footprint is like... the size of... Shaq's sneaker! Earth killer.

A very PO'd Fraulein

Fraulein Alyssa wrote:Now if only I could figure out how to work this damned computer...

AL GORE,

IF YOU'RE OUT THERE I COULD REALLY USE YOUR COMPUTER EXPERTISE!

Sehr geehrte Fräulein,

Please relocate to Al Gore's column at the Cube called "People's IT Guy" for proper re-education. See if your questions have already been answered. If not, ask your question and wait for an answer. All questions will be answered with zeal and profundity within the next five-year plan.

- https://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=16

Al Gore, People's Inventor wrote: <img align="left" hspace="6" src="/images/Gore_100.gif">Frequent computer crashes happen because people press the W key too much. Avoid it at all costs! That key had been removed from all White House keyboards on my secret orders! Every time you press a W key George W Bush knows what you're thinking... And don't listen to static in your phone line - you never know who may be playing with your brain. A lot of folks who I know did that wound up voting for W. So there.

Did you know that the new free Laika the Space Dog Browser (aka Firefox in non-socialist sectors) allows you to send email without having to stick a stamp to the monitor?

- Al Gore, People's Inventor

Red! I wish that I had known about the Holy Gore's column. After all these years for me not to know it? I shall dig an extra row of beets.

Now I will steam off the stamps on my old monitors. I have a room full of monitors which I had to retire because they are covered with stamps!

I hear and obey the Holy Gore.

Red Square wrote: Sehr geehrte Fräulein,

Take note, Comrade Rieuxcat...Comrade Red Square properly knows the speech of the Teutonic Satellite State.