From the People's Glossary:

Shovel

A symbol of suffering and sacrifice for The Greater Good™. Used in hard labor therapy or in self-criticism sessions to redeem potential thought crimes.

Every citizen must keep his or her shovel in good repair at all times and bring it to the railroad station if called to duty by the Commissar.

The shovel is an important part of Earth Day festival, or Sacrificial Earth Shoveling Day, celebrating the death and rebirth of Great Lenin.

Earth Day

A day of action to save the earth from farmers, ranchers, mining, timber, oil, chemical companies, and anyone else who seeks to utilize the earth's resources to enhance, enrich, and extend the lives of Americans and others worldwide. Characterized by the media's massive awareness drive to...

a) remind the world that American capitalists are raping the earth and stealing its riches, thus causing all of the planet's environmental problems;

b) advocate a greater government control of land, resources, and industries; and

c) increase the constantly growing white male guilt levels. A great way to politicize spring cleaning and give an ideological rationalization for the rebirth of nature.

Lenin

In Marxist pantheon, the deity of earth, toil, and light bulbs, the giver of beets, vodka, and happiness. A principal deity of the Soviet People who worshiped his mummy while believing he was still alive. Lenin's birthday is an important Marxist festival, also known as Sacrificial Earth Shoveling, or simply Earth Day.


April 22 is known in Russia as Lenin's birthday and is traditionally celebrated by uncompensated shoveling of earth. The event is called the Communist Subbotnik, or the Sacrificial Earth Shoveling Day.

On a Saturday around that day all workers, peasants, and toiling intelligentsia are supposed to donate to the Worker's State a day of free labor - either at workplace or on communal property - cleaning streets, digging earth in public parks and lawns, etc.

It is a good educational experience for the proletarians, reinforcing in them true communist values - sacrifice through hard uncompensated labor, humility, and respect for authority of the Party's founder.

It also provides a metaphysical experience wherein the proletarians can reach the state of spiritual enlightenment as motes of a vast collective. Vodka also helps.

Why can't we be like other progressive nations?

I know this thoughtcrime will get me sent straight to the gulag... so, I'll go get my shovel...


http://www.theobjectivestandard.com/exp ... or-die.asp

Glorious Cubed One - on this day of celebrating Lenin (praise be his name) and our Earth,


I have planted 10 dissidents out back in your honor…


И хопе тхис ис а биг еноугх суцк уп то мове уп ин тхе парты.

Шовел 4 У
Норлиск Гулаг

Completely out of character...

It's Earth Day again – unless you're celebrating Administrative Professionals Day (which is also today, but only for people who work).

In honor of Earth Day, I offer the following tips to make your home less green and more comfortable. Just like Al Gore's phat crib.

Instead of being green, we're going brown.

Brown Tips

1. Make sure and hoard incandescent light bulbs before the government mandated CF bulbs are completely phased in. This is especially important if you own a historic home and wish to preserve period lighting. Nothing is uglier than a Victorian home with gulag like interrogation CF lighting in every room (that's torture). Plus, regular light bulbs don't have any mercury in them.

2. Leave your 52 inch Plasma TV on all night – this will increase your carbon footprint significantly, help heat an empty room and also force Somali pirates to think twice about burglarizing your home. This is statistically proven to be more effective than an ADT sign in your flower bed.

3. Use as many sheets of two-ply soft toilet paper as you like. It's better to be clean, than to be green, or, brown.

4. Don't recycle. By not recycling, you are ensuring that their will be jobs for your over taxed great grandchildren as they pay for all the spending our government is doing today. A new shovel ready green industry will appear in the year 2109. Landfills across the US will be mined for aluminum cans that you and I threw away instead of recycling. Yes we aluminum can.

5. Use your Air Conditioner whenever you feel like it. It doesn't just keep you cool, it also conditions your air. Duh. You'll be healthier and you'll smell so much better.

6. Stop bathing in used dishwater. Nothing says I don't care like showing up to work with a piece of yesterday's dinner stuck in your ear.

7. Keep your existing toilets instead of replacing them with environmentally friendly low flow models. A low flow toilet will handle a rabbit turd. It will not handle you taking the Browns to the Super Bowl.

The polar bears thank you.

Comrade Carlos wrote:Completely out of character...

It's Earth Day again – unless you're celebrating Administrative Professionals Day (which is also today, but only for people who work).

[quote="Comrade Carlos"]Completely out of character...

7. Keep your existing toilets instead of replacing them with environmentally friendly low flow models. A low flow toilet will handle a rabbit turd. It will not handle you taking the Browns to the Super Bowl.

Comrade Carlos - being from Northern, Ohiostan, you need to understand that
the Browns lead us by their fine example of progressivism, they do not want to hurt the feelings of the other teams. Winning creates guilt!

Even our mascot is a liberal!


And for earth day - I suggest we honor GE for all they do!
{off}

Gulag, I have been to Ohiostan and it is glorious. Field after field of progressively farmed Earth. GE is wonderful indeed. Especially since "GE" in Greek means "Earth."

GE is indeed saving the Earth via spreading of truth in media, selling a wonderfully progressive line of eco-friendly products, green collective consciousness and excellent destroying of capitalism (the other green).

Having said this, comrades, I propose we do the obvious.

We should re-name Earth, "GE." This is not only correct, via the Greek, but is also rather fitting of such a gentle giant as GE. I only propose that we enhance the GE logo by replacing the Blue background with Green. It is more friendly to Islamo-Earth friendly. Two birds with one stone.

I have a vintage 1960's GE refrigerator that I bow down to shake hands with every morning as I grasp its handle, opening the door to reach in and grab the soy milk for my Kashi go lean.

Red Square wrote:It is a good educational experience for the proletarians, reinforcing in them true communist values - sacrifice through hard uncompensated labor, humility, and respect for authority of the Party's founder. It also provides a metaphysical experience wherein the proletarians can reach the state of spiritual enlightenment as motes of a vast collective. Vodka also helps.

Comrade Red Square,

This Earth Day should be made an official religious holiday, as you have hinted. I am especially looking forward to the penitence of the white males as they stand before Pope Algore of the Wackos Church of the Technology hating Unibomber, and repeat the following incantation: "we of the pale monkey of over achieving technological advancements have destroyed this planet with our advanced medical discoveries that have led to the survival of millions who should not have survived, and whose survival has now imperiled this earth with too many people." And then chant: "Death to all those who now live and prosper because of these advancements."

After this part of the ceremony is over, the congregants should then come to the altar for a swig of vodka, and then pray: "We pray for the death and destruction of all white people, of all airconditioned people, of all car driving people, of all those who live by way of pharmecueticals, of all those who eat cows, (but not goats or raw fish), and all those who dare to have a swimming pool in their back yards."

[quote="Comrade Carlos"] I only propose that we enhance the GE logo by replacing the Blue background with Green. It is more friendly to Islamo-Earth friendly. Two birds with one stone.

GE aka GAI - has indeed a most liberal logo:


Let us pray:

On this day, I bow to Jeffery Immelts Green Gia of GE who bows to the Lord Obama who bows to the World.

Comrade Irony Curtain sends us this year's edition of GreeNazi publication:

I worry for Dear Leader's delicate hands, him not used to shoveling and manly work. Giant woman can out shovel skinny man.

Gulag man saw many peoples standing and not shoveling while Dear Leader toiled in hot global warming sun.

Glorious Commissars must speak out for Dear Leader.

Comrade Carlos wrote:Gulag, I have been to Ohiostan and it is glorious. Field after field of progressively farmed Earth. GE is wonderful indeed. Especially since "GE" in Greek means "Earth."

GE is indeed saving the Earth via spreading of truth in media, selling a wonderfully progressive line of eco-friendly products, green collective consciousness and excellent destroying of capitalism (the other green).

Having said this, comrades, I propose we do the obvious.

We should re-name Earth, "GE." This is not only correct, via the Greek, but is also rather fitting of such a gentle giant as GE. I only propose that we enhance the GE logo by replacing the Blue background with Green. It is more friendly to Islamo-Earth friendly. Two birds with one stone.

I have a vintage 1960's GE refrigerator that I bow down to shake hands with every morning as I grasp its handle, opening the door to reach in and grab the soy milk for my Kashi go lean.

*sings*

GE, we bring more nukes to life

--
ZB

Our Comrads at TIME know how to crush the none-believers, and tranish the evil do'ers who fought for freedom in the battle of Iwo Jima.

Vladimir Toot'en wrote:Our Comrads at TIME know how to crush the none-believers, and tranish the evil do'ers who fought for freedom in the battle of Iwo Jima.

/karacter off

Despicable!!!

Gulag Man wrote:I worry for Dear Leader's delicate hands, him not used to shoveling and manly work. Giant woman can out shovel skinny man.

Gulag man saw many peoples standing and not shoveling while Dear Leader toiled in hot global warming sun.

Glorious Commissars must speak out for Dear Leader.

Not to worry he is using the new Mark IV version of the Prototype Teleprompter 3D trans positional imaging shovel soon to be on the market. It only appears to be shoveling. It is in fact transmitting a hologram of dirt (Note there are no beets) on each lift. Impressive eh? He has the 2.0 executive version. The Clone of his Life mate works well too. Said Clone to be disposed of after harvesting stem cells and beets.

Vladimir Toot'en wrote:Our Comrads at TIME know how to crush the none-believers, and tranish the evil do'ers who fought for freedom in the battle of Iwo Jima.

Yes. They must be taught a lesson.

Ask KMTC.org is proud to announce that the Obama administration is taking serious consideration in implementing KMTC's newest economic plan.

Obama believes in economic recovery. The president believes that outmoded systems of health care, energy and education are to blame for our bad economy and must be reformed now. We at Ask KMTC.org agree with the president and have submitted our "shovel ready" plan.

We propose that the best shovel ready plan for the nation is to create a vast inland sea within the United States.


This shovel ready plan will put the nation to work. It will also get rid of the useless "heartland" States which have never been of any real use to us. By digging an inland sea we will facilitate our national commerce, create jobs and, by eliminating a huge swath of otherwise useless land we will save energy as well. We could also reduce our nuclear arsenal by facilitating the digging process with nuclear excavation methods. This could have the additional advantage of giving our inland shores a bright nighttime glow that would eliminate the need for lighthouses and keep our Merchant Marine safe from harm. And, once the useless land that divided America has been shoveled away I envision the day when a mighty superbridge will be built that will span the new sea. A bridge that unites America, the Barack Obama bridge. For Barack Obama is the uniter.

For more Shovel Ready plans go to Ask KMTC.org and become a member!

Excellent plan comrade otis! This should immensely help the sea trade as well as increase the number of coastal cities. Also, every American will be able to own a beach house (depending on whether or not we dig beaches instead of sheer cliffs). I see a whole new realm of possibilities for irrigation and farming. Also, the genetic mutations from the radiation could result in a new race of super plants (super corn, anyone?). Besides, radiation has quite a unique flavor. Unfortunately, the light pollution from the dull glow of this radiation will make astrology more difficult.... but who needs stargazing when one can simply gaze upon a picture of obama's face?

Otis, this is brilliant idea! It's also the perfect solution to our current dilemma of rising oceans from melting ice caps. All that extra water can now go into this new inland sea.

Then we can take all the dirt we dig out and send it to the Arctic, so the polar bears will have a wonderful new place to live without worrying about it ever melting away and drowning them.

Meanwhile, extraterrestrials from billions of light years away will marvel and mull over the Earth's distinctive "Great Blue Spot" and what it could be.

Best of all, this will get rid of the Bible belt and all those annoying "red states."

(Long time no see, comrades. After having just being released from Karl Marx Treatment Center for the umpteenth time, I'm highly likely to go back after this:)
Is it just me or does the Messiah resemble Michael Jackson with those gloves? I mean, come on, in the first photo he could be moonwalking for all I know...

Party Diplomat Ivan Drago wrote:Is it just me or does the Messiah resemble Michael Jackson with those gloves? I mean, come on, in the first photo he could be moonwalking for all I know...

Comrade Drago,

I think he is moonsodding: using netroots and billionaire/lobbyist money showers to promote empty gestures based on faulty science that will, however, be cheered by the propaganda ministry and embraced by (a) lickspittles and (b) eco-zombies with vested financial and political interests.

In other words, he's entertainingly spreading the kind of sh*t that doesn't stink in the noses of people who live and breathe it.

Outstanding plan - this solves everything!!

{off}

The idea of an inland sea is wonderful. This is a monumental undertaking. Maybe to get things started and get our "feet wet", we could begin with our proposed Canal Project (last Dec) :

Digging canals was Lenin's idea too. Belomor Canalwas started by Lenin and finished by Stalin.

The Belomor Canal gave the Soviet Union a shipping canal from the White Sea to the Baltic, at a cost of at least 11,000 lives and the use of the forced labor of over 100,000 political prisoners. Even though the canal is narrow, shallow, and seasonal, it is still in use., especially for the transport of oil.

As you can observe, no carbon footprint was imposed on Mother Earth as no gas-guzzling earth moving equipment was used.


No horses or other beings of burden were harmed either - only a few hundred thousand thoughtcriminals, who used the opportunity of cardiovascular exercise in fresh air to clear their minds and open up their brain cells to the truth of the Common Good(TM).

SO LET'S NOT FORGET THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!

Perhaps the Commissar-in-Chief is not so experienced shoveling dirt, but earlier this week Transportation Commissar LaHood announced that many, many shovelfuls of stimulus cash have already made their way to the Chicagovitch Collective - more, in fact, than to any other People's Collective in the nation. He also announced that Chicagovitch will be the hub a new high speed canal system which will allow for the rapid transportation of many, many, many, many, many, more shovelfuls of what we kulaks used to call 'our money'.

Another heartwarming factoid I wouldn't have learned if were not for the fortunate members of our community who once enjoyed paradise behind the Iron Curtain.

Which brings me to an important question. Can anyone steer me towards books written by former citizens of the Soviet Union? Except for the Zionist traitor, Natan Sharansky, I find only material written by revisionists. . . uh, I mean loyal Marxists.

Perhaps Red Square would consider publishing a collection of essays written by former comrades. I would like to hear more stories from the traitor's perspective. The gushing praise from college professors and intellectuals has gotten stale.

No, I am not trying to kiss up in order to forward my position in The Party. . . (did you get my paperwork?)

Comrade Carolyn -

Here's one formerly Soviet thoughtcriminal right off the top of the head. He maintains a sizable collection of stories and essays on Pajamas Media:

Shovelful 1
<br>Shovelful 2

Comrade_Tovarich wrote:

Party Diplomat Ivan Drago wrote:Is it just me or does the Messiah resemble Michael Jackson with those gloves? I mean, come on, in the first photo he could be moonwalking for all I know...

Comrade Drago,

I think he is moonsodding: using netroots and billionaire/lobbyist money showers to promote empty gestures based on faulty science that will, however, be cheered by the propaganda ministry and embraced by (a) lickspittles and (b) eco-zombies with vested financial and political interests.

In other words, he's entertainingly spreading the kind of sh*t that doesn't stink in the noses of people who live and breathe it.

Ah... the collective wisdom of the party never ceases to amaze me.

Red Square wrote:Comrade Carolyn -

Here's one formerly Soviet thoughtcriminal right off the top of the head. He maintains a sizable collection of stories and essays on Pajamas Media:

Shovelful 1
<br>Shovelful 2

Thank you, Red Square. I look forward to sifting through these shovelfuls.

Comrade Otis wrote: We propose that the best shovel ready plan for the nation is to create a vast inland sea within the United States.

Sorry, Comrade, already been done... Cretaceous period:

Update: The KKK Kapitolists of FAUX tried to infiltrate our loyal maker of all good things green and purveyor of the only truth in media. Dear Comrade Immelt followed the party instruction manual and shut off this thugs mic. Here is Billo's (spit) delusional attempt at RW agitprop of our a supposed VLWC with GE and his O'liness.

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Note the mention of "Re Education Camp" - Long live KMTC!!

As Buddha was fond of saying,
"OMFG".

AbecedariusRex wrote:As Buddha was fond of saying,
"OMFG".

Gassho Abe... Gassho! Taigen Sensei said just this thing in his last teisho!

With Metta
Sis

"Oh Ananda, Be a lamp unto yourself."

We had a golden retriever named Ananda - which always amused me. Made me think that maybe there was a Taigen Sensei and a Taigan Sensei.

Just occurred to me that when the girl in Flannery O'Connor's "Good Country People" says "we are not our own light! we are not our own light!" maybe she was referring to that APPO DEEPO BHAVA. I've always liked that story (the death of Buddha story) - though I'll probably say something really inglorious when I die, like "OW!" or "that shouldn't be doing that" or something of that nature. Hardly quotable stuff what what?

To CarolynCriss,

Yuri Bezemov, or Tomas Schuman after he defected from the KGB has a free book available in .pdf and there are several youtube videos of his interviews. This is old material but in my opinion it is the best description of the strategies and tactics that the left has used against the soft headed enlightened among us. I showed these videos as a College Rethuglikan back in the 80's (prior to re-education). Of course Red Square would know much more about Bezemov than myself.

It was not coincidental that the first Earth Day was on the 100th Anniversary of the birth of Vladimir Lenin!

SHHHHH! Don't tell anybody!

DЭMOCЯAT dяivэя using GPS during ЭAЯTH DAY.