Jobless GM Automakers Celebrate Saving The Planet



The automaker communities are widely celebrating the event with eco-friendly block parties, Earth fairs, outdoor concerts of New Age music, drum circles in the wilderness, meditations, body painting, and unrhymed poetry readings that venerate the earth as a living, spiritual being that feels pain when it is being drilled for oil.
GM Chairman and CEO Rick Wagoner said before the automakers' annual meeting in Delaware that his conscience is finally clear of concerns about Global Warming and saving the polar bears. "Jobs should no longer be viewed as the source of income, economic stability, and overall satisfaction, because the government is supposed to take care of all that," he said. "Do we dream of bringing back industry? Or do we recognize that technology is an abomination against nature; that free enterprise is exploitation; that private property ownership is impossible; and Western Culture is the root of all evil?"


Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick announces the city's new eco- friendly slogan: "ZERO JOBS EQUAL ZERO EMISSIONS."
Wagoner said he was glad to help the American automakers to lead the rest of the world by example in adopting environmentally friendly lifestyles. "Some people may call you unemployed, but they will be wrong. You are not unemployed - you are the ecologically aware non-income-earning earth-friendly members of society."
"Finally you and your families will be able to live on the same diet as the caribou in ANWR, who are known for their lean and healthy looks," Wagoner said.
The automakers were then asked to tune in to the crystal matrix frequency (Mother Earth's heartbeat) and to relax.
When questioned about the chance of allocating products to the idling plants in the future, Mr. Wagoner told the audiences to concentrate on a cloud floating overhead, to invite the cloud in to fill their empty souls, and to accept the cloud spirit as the leader and guide for their lives.
In line with the green theme of the event, the General Motors administration created a special Saving Gaia Pledge Wall, which laid-off automakers were encouraged to decorate with symbolic drawings reflecting on their personal plans of greenifying the Earth.
Wagoner's personal plans of greenifying the Earth included cutting 19,000 more jobs in the next few months, while making sure that the layoffs are conducted in "as environmentally friendly manner as possible."
Anonymous
Admiral Notenuff


RIK











Red Square
Commissar M, your face in the avatar has changed. Have you undergone plastic surgery as part of an infiltration project, or are the uranium mines having such a rejuvenating effect on you?If it's the latter, then I see a
In the meantime, since we're going to be eating what the caribou eat from now on, I thought I'd do a little research to see what's for dinner:
Cladonia rangiferina - also known as "caribou moss." Yum yum!
Off to google for recipes . . .







Red Square
Commissar M, your face in the avatar has changed. Have you undergone plastic surgery as part of an infiltration project, or are the uranium mines having such a rejuvenating effect on you?It's all due to the Messiah's embryonic stem cell research program. Now, true Progressives can literally, not just figuratively, make themselves over! For a metahuman Progressive Messiah capable of single-handedly healing the Earth, lowering the levels of the oceans and creating jobs for the jobless out of thin air, nothing is impossible.






Roger Smith, CEO, Retired
oo
tn
e
y
?
'cause we're out.
Leak: GM to trade Hummer division for People's Trabant Motor Company. Yugo also eyed.
GM -- Mark of Ignorance.
Hillary the former great
The Swimmer
Bill C - lookin for luvin
The Maverick
Vice-Engineer on the Jive Talk Express.
H, we'll take ya. We need someone experienced to steamroll the Conservatives.
Bill C - lookin for luvin


Marxist author Grace Lee Boggs from Detroit
Most people think that jobs are the answer to racism, to poverty, etc. We have to understand that jobs no longer play the role they did in periods of scarcity. We need to measure the worth of a human being in very different ways. Do we dream of bringing back industry? Or do we recognize that, to be a human being, you have to have a different relationship with the earth, a different relationship with your fellow citizens, a different relationship between country and city. So many changes need to take place. How do we translate that into struggle? Into organizing?"– Detroit author Grace Lee Boggs from Revolutionis a New Beginning






We salute our auto makers for stopping the madness. We too have been working diligently and we have great news from the Global Front for Healthcare!
As you know, we Health Care Providers have been working tirelessly to bring errant man back into nature's bosom. Our new initiative, "Roots for Humanity" has indeed flourished and promises to end all conflict, global warming and pollution in one fell swoop. Based on my original hypothesis that the environment radically alters the human physique, we began our planting project several years ago. Children aged 10 to 16 (only the hardiest ones) were buried to the waist at our research facility in Grade A soil. Of course the goal was to create a human capable of rooting and using mother Earth for nutrients. In adition no conflict could occur since roots would prevent unnecessary aggressive movements. No more cars is an added benefit, since they will no longer be needed.
Well, not only has our experiment been a grand success, but we have also seen these children grow into adulthood and bear fruit . . . literally! The girls seem to grow grape-like fruit from the skin with small seeds that once buried create small eco-friendly children. They self bury and take root almost immediately. The boys produce banannaesque fruit from the armpits.
These "children of the future" use CO2! They produce food! They do not fight!
The future is here my friends.


As a former member of the now defunct capitalist regime I've now seen the light and am trying to amend my ways.... But whenever I try to google "loser, failed, miserable, starving, homeless," etc., all I get in a link to the DNC.
I'm convinced we are not going to hell in hand basket fast enough. Trying to speed up the process makes sense, I just don't know how to do it.
How about it?




Navigator
.... we are not going to hell in hand basket fast enough. Trying to speed up the process makes sense, I just don't know how to do it.That gives me an idea for a picture.

I'll post it in the Denver thread as well.


'Cept maybe: "We Are Not Going To Hell In A Hand basket Fast Enough!"
A little stronger colors on the red, white and blue... I mean ... I know get your drift but the intended audiences in the Blue states, colorblind of course, will miss it.
;-)





;-)




Ummm....What about "change"?
Vote Obama To Speed Up The Change!
However, going to hell in a hand basket is a process.
An Obama World sure ain't progress.
Technically, he and we will be safe with "change".
All great satire is done with the fewest words possible.
Then what about?:
Vote Obama to Speed It Up!
or
Speed It UP!
Vote Obama!
Or
Vote Obama!
In some cases:
Vote! (For the dead Obama voters)


Kommisar Kaboom
In strict accordance with the principles of the People's Party, so-called "democratic" electoral processes are but pandering to the arrogant zionist-controlled electoral lobbies, and are frankly an anathema to truly progressive group-thought (which, of course, every so-called lickspittle capitalist swine lap-dog "democracy" truly should be).
My simple suggestion is this, Comrades: Let us forestall the zionist attempts to inculcate the unwashed masses with untold millions of dollars of advertising - let us instead divert those funds to the most needy Comrades, and let us simply ANNOINT our Candidate, Barrack Hussein Obama!



We should All just jump in the ZIL waste the peoples fuel.
TonysGirl


KansasGirl


Although I never payed attention to gas prices until a few years ago....

It warms my collectivist heart to see the Capitalist Pigs take one for the environment. Even though this has been the coldest winter in a decade, global warming is insidious!
We must stand united against the vile Plutocrats and their Dodge Rams and Ford F-350's! Because in our proletarian dreamland, environmentcrime is almost as bad as thoughtcrime
Just remember kids: Big Brother is Watching.
