Red Planet Teaser

The old world of capitalist oppression has failed to give birth to world-wide communist revolution. But that world was spoiled goods anyway! You can't shape the New Man in the immoral bourgeois environment. We say let the old blue planet go to the dogs.

We'll build our world on Mars! The Red Planet is not red by accident. It will have a striving state-subsidized culture, marked by great economic successes and technological breakthroughs - like in North Korea, only better.

Click on the movie to pause, double-click to play again.
QuickTime plugin required for Party members only

Or right-click hereto download it on your hard disk in case capitalist software or firewalls prevent you from viewing it directly.


 

When the doors of perception are cleansed, the bourgeoisie and their kulak enablers will see things as they truly are: relative and subjective.

How many fingers am I holding up, Winston?   ...Good.  

Red is blue and blue is red.  We are actually living on the Red Planet, the hoodwinked masses just haven't realized it yet!  They see blue where they will see red.  It's just a matter of time.
 

Lemme get this strait, red is blue and blue is red, and soon everything will be red... ouch... i think my brain just broked... ow...
 

Comrade Betty

Lemme get this strait, red is blue and blue is red, and soon everything will be red... ouch... i think my brain just broked... ow...

It seems the doublethink therapy is taking effect.  Good.  I doubt you'd like to be sent to Room 101.  That's reserved for the most intractable perpetrators of thought crime.  

The brain fatigue that you are experiencing is a temporary side effect that will wane as the treatment progresses.
 

I denounce this capitalist pig-dog video for causing Firefox to crash!
 

AHHHH, I see someone has been reading from our manifesto cleverly disguised as a book by George Orwell. I believe it was called 1984.

Dr Palimpsest, you sir will do good for the party. We must expose the public to their future gradually so that they will accept total domination....I mean our utopian values with the least resistance possible. Yes!!!!
 

Damn! I still can't Watch the video because of stupid missing plugins bull @#$%, *&%#$ @%$# *&$%^@^!

Comrade Betty -

Looks like someone has been pressing the "W" key too much lately.

1. Try restarting your keyboard.
2. If this doesn't solve your problem ask Comrade Al Gore.
3. Alternately you can try Internet Explorer instead of Firefox. That's if you're a Windows user.
4. If this doesn't solve your problem see option 2.

Red Square
 

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What the...
 

Comrade Betty

Damn! I still can't Watch the video because of stupid missing plugins bull @#$%, *&%#$ @%$# *&$%^@^!

Comrade Betty -

Looks like someone has been pressing the "W" key too much lately.

1. Try restarting your keyboard.
2. If this doesn't solve your problem ask Comrade Al Gore.
3. Alternately you can try Internet Explorer instead of Firefox. That's if you're a Windows user.
4. If this doesn't solve your problem see option 2.

Red Square

Seriously Komrades, I would not use IE, it is used by an evil force that even George Bush would tremble in fear of!  Unless you wish to be hit with never ending popups and viruses, I suggest firefox.
 

Fellow Comrades,
Komrade Koz made a great point in the Current Events division of our Cube mentioning the latest invention of the People's Cube.  Laika Space Dog Browser is the only browser supported by the People (Codename: Firefox for the capitalist world).  Why are we using capitalists' creation of web browsers (Real name: Internet Exploder)?

And somebody please get rid of Breather!  He needs to be re-educated.  Off to the gulag with him!

Flying with Laika,
Vladimir Ivanov
Red Journalism Headquarters, Moscow, USSR
 

Quote:

And somebody please get rid of Breather!  He needs to be re-educated.  Off to the gulag with him!

Yes, Vladimir, using the "W" key that much isn't good for your computer. I have just cut several years off of my coputer's life with that first "W"... Shit! that's even more years! now my computer has only enough life for the next 3 seconds. What am I going to d....
*computer over*
 

Comrade Betty

Quote:

And somebody please get rid of Breather!  He needs to be re-educated.  Off to the gulag with him!

Yes, Vladimir, using the "W" key that much isn't good for your computer. I have just cut several years off of my coputer's life with that first "W"... Shit! that's even more years! now my computer has only enough life for the next 3 seconds. What am i going to d....
*computer over*

I am usually cautious to not type the evil "double-U" charcter too often.  It reminds me too much of the capitalist pig, and the failed revolu...

I mean, there was no revolution.  I must have been thinking of a movie or something.  John Kerry was a lie made up by the captialist-propaganda machine CNN.
 

Who's John Kerry?
 

Vladimir Ivanov

Who's John Kerry?
Never heard of him!

HEY!!! THAT'S MINE!
AND I HAVE A T-SHIRT TO PROVE IT!

ROSAESQ.
 

You backsliding capitalist boot-lick lackeys fail to understand that the Socialist Left is an "Evolving Paradigm". You know, 'A work in progress'. Redouble our efforts. Root out the last few selfish exploiters of the Party's love and kindness. And so forth.

Call me at the beach house in Nantucket if anything comes up.....

There once was a man from Nantuket,
Who got his head stuck in a bucket.
When he couldn't get out,
He started to shout,
And then he decided to just fuck it

-Premier Betty
 

I have finally seen the video!!!!!!!!!!!! I am here taking a programing class at one of this countries fine communist indoctrination centers (Dominican University) and the powerful computers that they have here finally have the right programs to play this splendid video!
I must admit that it was vey good, and seemed to have Star Wars influences in it with the giant Peoples cube floating in space like the Death Star. We must plan on making that a reality. But instead of destroying planets, the "Cube Star" as we shall call it should have a beam weapon that forces whomever we dislike to do the monkey for the rest of their lives.

Good to hear that, comrade.
-Vladimir Ivanov
 

Premier Betty

I have finally seen the video!!!!!!!!!!!! I am here taking a programing class at one of this countries fine communist indoctrination centers (Dominican University) and the powerful computers that they have here finally have the right programs to play this splendid video!
I must admit that it was vey good, and seemed to have Star Wars influences in it with the giant Peoples cube floating in space like the Death Star. We must plan on making that a reality. But instead of destroying planets, the "Cube Star" as we shall call it should have a beam weapon that forces whomever we dislike to do the monkey for the rest of their lives.

Good to hear that, comrade.
-Vladimir IvanovI liked the mothership!
 

Comrades,

What a wonderful and glorious idea!!  How does the People's Spaceship progress?  Is it near completion?

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH[/b]
 

Blue is the tool of the Capitalist Oppressors!

Red is red!

Blue is un-red!

I am but a spark in the flamethower of Revolution!

I humbly return to fufilling quota...
 

In a quite expected development, Google is promoting Potemkingrad as well!

In the new Google ad (at the top of our pages) there's a small link "Advertise on this site." I checked it and clicked on "sign up" to see what's there. What do you know - see the sample ad at the bottom. You'll probably see it too if you go there.


 

Comrades!!! Call Al Gore!! Man is destroying our Worker's Paradise on Mars before we even get there!
Global Warming has spread to Mars!
What to do?  What to do?!

AHHHHHHHHH!

http://www.dailytech.com/Global+Warming+Detected+On+Mars/article6331.htm

O'Brien

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
 

It's all the fault of those damn robots the kkkapitalist NASA keeps sending to destroy every planet in the solar system in their vein attempts to contain socialism. those robots burn the souls of good progressive babies for fuel, and they leak radiation and all sorts of nasty mean bad stuff all over the place. it must be stopped!
 

I have a horrible fear that somewhere on the Red Planet are people who are not victims of the Democratic Party, er, benefiting from the enlightened attitudes of Madam Speakerette and our Many Titted Empress. After all, every being in the universe should have the benefit of the wisdom of the collective.

And they might have some Magic Pixie Juice too, or something else that we could steal, er, appropriate for the Greater Good.

Of us. Hahahaha. Oops. Wet 'em. Sorry for my indescretion; I've just been to a cocktail party and I'm quite giddy. One too many Stalins. Have you tried the Stalin? It's a cocktail made of virgin's blood and widow's tears.
 

Premier Betty

Quote:

And somebody please get rid of Breather!  He needs to be re-educated.  Off to the gulag with him!

Yes, Vladimir, using the "W" key that much isn't good for your computer. I have just cut several years off of my coputer's life with that first "W"... Shit! that's even more years! now my computer has only enough life for the next 3 seconds. What am I going to d....
*computer over*

It is sad to see that even here the vile pigdog bushitler can infiltrate red command with his middle initial in a vain effort to subjugate the masses

____________________

"Do you hate being a liberal? What's it like? Is it like being a bug?
I imagine bugs and liberals have a dim perception that nature played a cruel trick on them, but they lack the intelligence to comrehend the magnitude of it."
 

LoneRedStar

"Do you hate being a liberal? What's it like? Is it like being a bug?
I imagine bugs and liberals have a dim perception that nature played a cruel trick on them, but they lack the intelligence to comrehend the magnitude of it."

Comments like that would seem to be a cry for help. The Party will be reaching out their hand for you soon. You sound like an excellent candidate for the Pioneers of the Red Planet's Collective farm. Don't worry about that dull shovel you will be issued, it will be sharpened by the rocky soil of our glorious Red Planet!
 

LoneStarRed, bugs are the center of the universe. We really are. The world exists because we do. There is nothing outside us, no reality that is not our perception.

We ARE the world....sing out sing out...
 

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *
Comrade Union Boss, I hope you don't mind but I resized your etch-a-sketch transmission to a width of 550 pixels. It was so big it was stretching the page. If you use the EDIT button you can see how I resized it.

Yours in Revolutionary fervor!

Comrade Otis
 

May I suggest that no pages be accompanied with music? WHATSOEVER? Please? Please? Please? Lest someone confuse us with a porn site.

Oh. This is a porn site. So the "Internationale" is okay.
 

Thank Commie Otis. It wasn't that big in my file folder or in Photoshop. I did notice that it was wreeking havok with the page, but didn't know what to do. But, I did the right thing, because I let the powers that be correct me and show me my errors. My thanks to the State.
 

From whence is the music coming from? I have been to this thread before without being assaulted.
 

The video thingy with pictures of Mars the and giant People's Cube space station floating in space.
 

That was what I figured as well, but it never played for me before! I don't have Quicktime on my computer, only a program that plays almost every one of their files. Hmmm, makes me wonder if one of the kiddo's didn't load it to my computer!
 

I had a problem m of never being able to watch it because I could never download QuickTime.  When I finally got a new computer, it got fixed when I downloaded it.  Just download QuickTime, then you will get the video.  I know you don't like it, but just do it anyway.
 

There must have been something else going on. The video and music is playing for me, but I still don't have quicktime. I have Quicktime Alternative 1.77 and I see they now have a 1.90.
 

Wait, you can see the video playing, and hear the music?  I guess there is no longer a problem, but I recommend downloading QuickTime anyway, because the alternative program you have may not work on all websites and stuff.  The only  real reason I got QuickTime was so I could play the animations that I made in my computer arts class in high school because we were required to render them in the QuickTime Format.

I've got VLC Media Player which will play almost every media format out there, but I still think it's a good idea to have QuickTime.  I just turn off the automatic updates thingy and make sure not to set it as my primary media payer.
 

I have turned off the automatic updates thing more times than I can remember. But I have found that there is perhaps less than 1% of the sites I have gone to that I had a problem with my alternative quicktime. In fact, I really can't think of but one site that I had a problem with. Tell you another one I have a great alternative for, and that is Adobe Reader. I always hated that one as well since it was always so slow loading. I have Foxit, and pdf files open almost immediately with that and I don't get bothered with updates from that either.
 

Really, you hate Adobe reader?  I have never had any problems with it loading slowly, then again, I probably haven't noticed since my internet is so slow anyway.
 

Oh yes, I hate Adobe and it's updates. It is slow loading on every computer I have ever owned and at work. You just don't notice it since you have not tried the Foxit reader and compare the time it takes for both to come up.
 

I don't have any trouble with Adobe updates, and I have never even heard of Foxit.  Can you download it, or do you have to buy it?
 

Premier Betty

I don't have any trouble with Adobe updates, and I have never even heard of Foxit.  Can you download it, or do you have to buy it?

Buy it? Buy it? As if I would waste money that belongs to the Many Titted Empress!

http://www.foxitsoftware.com/pdf/rd_intro.php
 

How foolish I was!  I forgot that party members always try to avoid "buying" materials that belong to the state.

I'll try it out and see how it compares.  Who knows, maybe I'll get rid of Adobe Reader forever....
 

It the Foxit is also something like 3mb vs Adobe's 11 or 12. Why do I need such a big program for the occassional document to read on the internet?
 

The Adobe works in mysterious ways.  It just makes things more confusing.
 

Larger, more taxing on system recources..thats Adobe..Thats why Adobe is the STATE APPROVED PDF reader. They have a "near" monopoly on PDF software, the software demands updates that annoy the F out of you, and the name adobe, well, its a substance that comes from mother earth. I don't know about the rest of you rebels, but I am obviously sticking with adobe. (as far as the State knows)
 

I can't tell how much faster the Foxit runs on my computer at work. When you use adobe, you get this flash screen, and then you see all the little programs loading on it...then typically I get a blank screed before seeing my document. With Foxit, I click on a pdf on the internet for instance, and it just opens. It looks every bit as good as Adobe.
 

I don't know anything about those other programs, but I do know QuickTime should work just play clicking on "Here" and waiting.

By the way, does anyone know what song that is playing in the background? It sounds good.
 

Sherlock Pup to the rescue. The song is Peace Frog by the Doors.

My Quicktime substitute program plays it fine... I am Quicktime free!!!
 

Wow, I got here as fast as I could Comrades. I totally had to find the CD with the Doors song Peace Frog and found it today! I was exposed to the the cube on the Limbaugh radio program and since I am a recent Ayn Rand reader I was naturally curious about your web site. I too am proud to be a thought criminal. So what is the ETA on the RED PLANET site does any one know.
 

chinaai

So what is the ETA on the RED PLANET site does any one know.


So far we are still colonizing Potemkingrad with our future slave popul-, I mean, "intelligent" and "good" people who refuse to live under the oppression of kkkapitalism.
 

chinaai

I too am proud to be a thought criminal.

Whoa whoa!!!! Do you wish to be a proud dull shovel bearer as well? Have you any idea what happens to thought criminals here? You need to get in touch with your inner comrade! Check for instructions here Inner Comrade
 

Commissar Pupovich

chinaai

I too am proud to be a thought criminal.

Whoa whoa!!!! Do you wish to be a proud dull shovel bearer as well? Have you any idea what happens to thought criminals here? You need to get in touch with your inner comrade! Check for instructions here Inner Comrade

Ah well no I don't like yard work personally. I checked out the lesson on "Inner Comrade" that looks like a lotta work. So are you all gettin ready the big holiday on Nov 7th?
 

Well, if there is one thing we try to avoid here it is work. While of course we are all equal, some are more equal than others right? We find that those who are less equal have a greater talent for work.

Yes, I don't know of the other's plans, but I still celebrate the Glorious 7th of November.
 

There is nothing on Nov. 7th on my calendar that has every important occasion pre-printed on it.  If I am missing out on something because one of the unwashed masses failed to put it on the calendar, heads will roll.  (because you just can't execute one person, you have to set an example.)
 

Ah Premier, best warm up your guillotine or whatever your choice of "re-education." I just answered your post in that thread accusing me of being a thought criminal.
 

NO!! Not my neck!  My beautiful, solid, whole neck!  I can't part with it!  I'll just choose a tropical island labor camp where I will be forced (against my will) to drink cool drinks with umbrellas in them.  The horror.
 

No doubt you would choose and be granted such a "re-education" camp! LOL
 

Of course!  What could possibly re-educate anyone more than a luxurious intensive recreation work facility designed to relax work you to the brink of death?  I'm positively dreading what horrors and atrocities I will face.  Just think of it, beautiful women to pander to my every need working my hands to the bone for the benefit of the party, sitting on the beach beaning proles with my golf ball gun being physically beaten by strangely dressed guards who smile in a very weird way, and dining on the finest meals that lots of other peoples money can buy eating gruel and water once a day for my entire stay.  I will certainly not enjoy it.
 

Ah I can't help but wonder if Potemkingrad has such a fine facility for re-education! I very much enjoy resort style re-education, so comrades when was the last time you went to the Marxist country of Mexico. Now there is an education in how to live, pool side or beach side with nicely dressed less equal comrades to provide for your every need! The torture tables located ocean side Oh the pain and suffering can't you just smell the coconut oil.
 

All I could smell when I went down there was sewage.
 

What a shame. That means you did not drink enough Vodka. Then you would not smell anything.
 

I guess 13 cases weren't enough.  That or they mysteriously disappeared... again.
 

 

W007!

Just replace Saturn with the death star and that about sums it up.
 

Maksim! Great poster. It truly captures the dream of Potyomkingrad and should be prominently displayed at all Party gatherings. But please, no death star. I don't agree with Betty.
 

I have posters that I brought with me from Motherland, really like retro style. My Photoshop skills are very limited, but altering them to suit cubist proposes is good idea. No?

I’m thinking of posting one in People’s Competition, and then all can play.

Here is original...


 

Maksim M. Isaev

I’m thinking of posting one in People’s Competition, and then all can play.

Very nice. I like that retro stuff too. Looking forward to seeing what you do in People's Competition. Have you ever looked at this:

USSR Posters
 

Comrade Otis

Have you ever looked at this:

Have now, excellent!
 

Comrade Weenie Otis

please, no death star. I don't agree with Betty.


Wimp. How are we supposed to assert our galactic superiority without planet destroying super weapons (other than communism)?
 

I can't wait till The Party get those rockets ready and we leave this hot capitalistic filth that is Earth.
 

Commissar Vladimir Ivanov

Who's John Kerry?


I think he was in Nam.
 

Didn't he take a grenade up the butt?
 

Premier Betty

Didn't he take a grenade up the butt?

No, no, no, no, he took one in the butt Premier.
 

What's the difference?
 

All good komrades should realize socialism is universe and should inflate tires in anticipation of travel to red planet.

Yakov
 

I have just channeled the ghost of Lenin and he assures me that Comrade Yakov will soon sustain four flat tires in a high speed police chase.
 

Comrades,

I am slackjawed beyond my normal slackjawedness at the revolutionary concept of interplanetary revolution. This is downright Copernican in its intentional to get everyone with the revolution program.

Yet I must point out that colonization has an inconvenient youth of sorts: John Carter, Warlord of Mars. I read his stories as a thoughtcrime-plagued North American youth and thrilled to his adventures, saving princesses, and hanging out with six-armed hombres. While clearly a capitalist exploiter and übermensch, he could inhibit colonization.

Then again, Chiang Kai-Shek was Warlord of China and look at how things turned out for that running dog lackey of the Big Noses.
 

While Red China's national anthem is "The East is Red," will the Red Planet's be "The Planet is Red"?
 

Dr W. S. Palimpsest

When the doors of perception are cleansed, the bourgeoisie and their kulak enablers will see things as they truly are: relative and subjective.

How many fingers am I holding up, Winston? ...Good.


Red is blue and blue is red. We are actually living on the Red Planet, the hoodwinked masses just haven't realized it yet! They see blue where they will see red. It's just a matter of time.

I. See. Four. LIGHTS!
 

Comrades,

Mars Exploration Rover Mission, Cornell, JPL, and NASA, all better known as Capricorn One, have provided a panorama of Mars. As both Lenin and Enzo Ferrari knew, Red = Sex and Sex Sells! As Che shows, Red sells as well, possibly even better than sex, given the recent porn industry bailout request.

Come to Mars, comradette, and let's play dusty! After all, it might be your new patriotic duty, and it does get pretty cold at night (and day and even at perihelioin), too.