Image

King Salman and Obama agree on voter exchange program

User avatar
Obama_Saudi_King_Salman_Handshake.jpg
MECCA, SAUDI ARABIA - A joint US-Saudi Arabia press conference was held outside the Kaaba late Tuesday night for King Salman and U.S. President Barack Hussein Obama, in which they summed up their negotiations that ended in a friendly agreement and a mutually beneficial citizen exchange program.

Noting the many hours of "robust" negotiations, King Salman addressed the American people directly: "First, you'll never find out what's in the 28 redacted pages of the 911 Commission Report, and we promise not to dump $750 billion US Treasury notes."

He then stunned reporters with a bold proposal, noting his kingdom's chronic shortage of foreign slaves available "for hire" as domestic help.

"We have asked President Obama, and he has graciously agreed, to send us your entire stock of Republican voters and their families, starting with Trump supporters. In exchange, you will receive an equal amount of Saudi Arabians and residents of our neighboring Muslim countries, shipped to you live and unharmed, to replenish your dwindling and unenthusiastic Democrat voter base."

President Obama, himself progeny of Arab-Muslim slave traders, seemed unable to contain his enthusiasm and was overheard to say from his kneeling position on the floor, "This is consistent with our values. This is who we are."

Presidential hopeful, Hillary Clinton, in a video interview via SKYPE, applauded the measure. "This swap could not have happened at a more appropriate time in history," she quipped. "Frankly, the whole Benghazi thing was getting to be a bit taxing."

White House Press Secretary Josh Ernest could not attend the Mecca press conference because of his current non-Muslim status and was therefore unavailable for comment.

Mecca_Muslims_Only_Sign.jpg

User avatar
Good thing they finally came to an agreement. Looks like Washington is already starting to coalesce around the new program.

Image

User avatar
Comrade Sovremennyy wrote:Good thing they finally came to an agreement. Looks like Washington is already starting to coalesce around the new program.

Image

Wow, Sov! You've got your own Mecca, huh? In DC nonetheless! Must've spent a fortune on the real estate. Tell me, will you replace the walking around a black cube with trying to walk around after you've drunk 50 bottles of Beet Vodka? And replace the silly prayers in Arabic with glorious workers tunes? And instead of there being no food we can get expired military rations cooked on fires lit in 55 gallon drums?

User avatar
There's a future for the Kube even after the muslim conquest of the USA...

ALL HAIL THE PEOPLE'S KABAA!

kabaaa.jpeg


OK, this was too obvious comrades... But someone had to do it...

Glorious greetings

User avatar
Comrade Stierlitz was most insightful when he wrote:
Wow, Sov! You've got your own Mecca, huh? In DC nonetheless! Must've spent a fortune on the real estate. Tell me, will you replace the walking around a black cube with trying to walk around after you've drunk 50 bottles of Beet Vodka? And replace the silly prayers in Arabic with glorious workers tunes? And instead of there being no food we can get expired military rations cooked on fires lit in 55 gallon drums?

All that and more! Every new voter will be urged to take a pilgrimage to D.C. and worship the most just, most merciful and peaceful hand of the government.*

*Failing to comply will be punishable by death.


 
POST REPLY