THE HACKERS BEHIND the Ashley Madison breach have been contracted by the FBI to retrieve Madam Hillary's 35, 000 yoga emails that were scrubbed from her personal server.

On the heels of being stonewalled and lied to by the former Sec. of State, the bureau has determined that a bigger batch of deletions were unretrievable unless true experts, such as the Ashley Madison hackers, were contracted to retrieve the wiped correspondences.

This latest batch of emails may prove to be more embarrassing to the Clinton campaign as it is believed that Clinton's yoga emails will reveal her frustrations with being unable to perform such notable yoga positions as the Downward Facing Dog, Bend to Left Leg pose and the always difficult One-Legged King Pigeon pose.

Since we're all going to end up screwed over no matter what happens, I suggest that Congress should look into this. In specific:

The Congress of the Five Auspicious Ants
The Congress of the Fox and the Persimmon

and, for El Presidente,

The Congress of The Friendly Dog and the Two Small Biscuits

... what? Yoga positions? What's a fat thieving bear got to do with it?

These hackers will be well paid so if any information on Govt officials is found,
it may be removed from recovered info before it becomes public. One hand washes the other.

I would hope that one would do SOME kind of wiping after using Ashley Madison...

On the heels of yoga routines and emails comes a new update to the Current Truth:

Recovered images from Hillary emails prove it was only yoga

El Presidente - this post is now featured on the Mother Page!

Congratulations on behalf of the Party and the government.

Red Square wrote:El Presidente - this post is now featured on the Mother Page!

Congratulations on behalf of the Party and the government.

I will proudly hang this glorious image on the wall next to my portraits of Kim Jong Ill and Barack Hussein Obama.

Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:I would hope that one would do SOME kind of wiping after using Ashley Madison...

Like with a cloth or something?