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Jimmy Carter Builds Habitat For Hamas

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Image Carter hard at work as Hamas members
prepare to launch fireworks in celebration.

On the heels of building a wildly successful Habitat for Hamsters in San Francisco, President Jimmy Carter went on to start a new Habitat for Hamas project in Gaza, to build new homes for families whose old houses had been bulldozed by Israel in retaliation for suicide bombings.

Jimmy Carter says he feels “quite at ease” working with Hamas leader Khaled Mashaal.

"I've been meeting with Hamas leaders for years," says Carter. "I find them to be peace-loving people, misunderstood by bigoted Americans. If Israel would dismantle its Apartheid and meet all the demands of Hamas, everyone could live in peace and harmony."

Habitat for Hamas will help solve the housing problem for Hamas families despite the group's stated commitment to the violent destruction of Israel. "You can't always get prerequisites adopted by other people before you even grovel and beg," the former U.S. president said.


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Proud new homeowner Shaul Thabet says, "Israelis bulldozed our old home accusing us of using it as a base for suicide attacks. I am so proud of my husband. I am happy that Allah has granted him the chance to be a martyr. Soon our baby son will follow in his footsteps".



Habitat for Hamas has shown that building homes does more than put a roof over someone's head. It also provides them a environment for training, planning, and executing missions.

Whether it be Rhodesia, Nicaragua, Cuba, Venezuela, Iran, or North Korea, Jimmy Carter knows good, honest, and well-intentioned people when he sees them.

As a world peacemaker, he is able to highlight the errors of American foreign policy and show the world that thugs, dictators, despots, and fascists are people too.

"Please support us in our efforts to legitimize Hamas because they are much more than just a terrorist organization," says Carter.

International Sponsors:

These companies have donated their products and services to Habitat for Hamas.

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We at CODEPINK strongly believe in Habitat for Hamas's
mission to undermine American imperialism.


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AIR-AFAT Heating and Cooling is a Palestinian company founded in 1959.
Profits are held in a Swiss bank account rainy day fund
for the benefit of all Palestinians.


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INTIFADA Floor Covering supports Habitat for Hamas,
for together we will drive Israel into the sea.


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KATUSHAS Power Tools made by the same people
who brought you KATUSHAS Rockets.
___________________________________
Thanks to the collective for their contributions.

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It's much better to give donations to such a fine group rather than donate it to those filthy kkkapitalist charities.

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Worlds Most Politically Correct Song

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I have been hesitant to speak on the mission of Jimmy Carter for I know there are many here who do not agree with me that there is nothing to be gained by the Party support Islamic terrorism. so on the surface, the Party should support Jimmy Carter. On the other hand, we also must consider that this is a trip that even Koffi Anan and fellow travelers, an esteemed group of progressives if there ever was one, concluded was a bit too over the top for them to accompany Jimmy Carter. Personally, I think Jimmy would be a more effective "martyr" to the cause if he were to become a Super-Super Delegate necro voter as a result of some "etiquette breech" while meeting with Hamas, or even arrested on arrival, tired, and executed by the terrorist Bush regime. That would be most helpful to the cause.

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Comrade Drago wrote:Worlds Most Politically Correct Song

What Comrade??? Were you not as offended as I by the many hateful and discriminatory group descriptions he used?


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no no no u dont understand, he stands for those ppl, and he does want us out of vietnam so he has to be good

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Then for instance, he would have said "I stand for the height challenged, I stand for the differently abled, I stand for the melanin endowed..."

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MSN-KGB: Carter spear heads Hug a Terrorist Foundation.

"Give terrorism a chance"
"Give terrorists hugs not bombs"

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I remember this. Carter helped me build my luanching pad. If it wasn't for him, there would have been no way I would have hit that school.

On behalf on Editorial Central planning.

This is outstanding. This MUST go front page.

Looks like lots of happenings while I've been off dealing with the 6 week old
10 pound sleep deprivation device.

Jew Be Gone Gas Ovens and Ranges.


Hamas Hilti nails "If they can hold a jew on a cross, they can hold up a house"

Anderson Windows Gaza Strip Edition "Won't break when your neighborhood stoning gets out of control"

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General Secretary wrote:Jew Be Gone Gas Ovens and Ranges.


Hamas Hilti nails "If they can hold a jew on a cross, they can hold up a house"

Anderson Windows Gaza Strip Edition "Won't break when your neighborhood stoning gets out of control"
Excellent!
BTW: Congratulations on going forth and multiplying.

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Comrades,

Jimmy the Dhimmi embodies the communal spirit of progressive selflessness. To further collectivist ends under the commerically successful guise of ecological compassion, I propose that Comrade Carter be recycled and fed to the Palestinian people. They are already one in spirit and should accordingly be one in body, like a peanut nutter and jihadeli sandwich. Yes, Jimbo would be a sparse and foul-tasting meal, but everything goes better with Plains' nut spread and by setting an example of giving literally everything to the State, the ends would undoubtedly justify the means. Kinda like soylent green from pungent Plains.

Lo! For what more galvanizing proletarian epithet could a comrade desire than this?

A farmer whose pernicious yields but increase,
Has fed himself to the fabled process of peace,
Leaving a taste in the mouth akin to aged hummus,
He sweetened the deal for enraged Hamas,
Giving of self to become an eco-friendly fertilizer,
Injecting hope with the efficacy of a tranquilizer,
An ideology applied liberally, not unlike manure,
That feeds what must, like the Party, eternally endure.

We need to stop wasting our dwindling supply of precious electrons by spelling out the name of the former Chowderhead in Charge. I suggest using his former Secret Service acronym POG(PATHETIC OLD GOOBER) And I apologize in advance for offending members of the Legumo-American community.

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I too have been concerned with the dwindling supply of electrons Comrade Axel. This Carter episode is yet another drain on our limited supply, However, I have initiated a new program to help, and I am sure you will be the first to purchase my new Electron Credits. For a nominal fee *for early subscribers only*. for every electron that you waste, through a patented proprietary process, I shall release an equivalent quanta of free electrons to replace your usage. How many credits may I put you down for Comrade?

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Thank The Collective I take my heart medication before viewing this forum!
Just when I think I can't soil my potato sack briefs anymore .. I dooo dooo!

An excellent proposal, Comrade, but I'm a little short at the moment because I just donated all my spare change to Senator Alabama so he can buy some extra-absorbent hankies to mop up the crocodile tears he's been shedding since the main stream meanies from ABC picked on him so unfairly in last weeks pissing cont...er, debate.

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A haiku:

Jimmy-tender-heart
memories of furry fun
missing rabbit pal

Carter_Rabbit.jpg


Is that bunny Jimi's holding the same one he lusted in his heart over?

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Whatever it is, I don't want to know....

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filthywhitemaleheteropig wrote:Is that bunny Jimi's holding the same one he lusted in his heart over?

It is the same wascally wabbit that was nearly taken out by Secret Service operatives when it threatened comrade Carter. Nice to see that they 'made up' and developed a special wabbit-man reliationship, more testimony to his role as peacemaker.


Pepe
Beats the hell out of Americans dying for Israel...

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Yes, comrade Pepe! The subtitle of this piece should be "Carter Fights Apartheid and Killer Rabbis". Those bloodthirsty flesh-eating Israeli Chupacabras!

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Pepe is correct! If defending your liberty or self-interest, or that of your friends and neighbors could cost you your life, it is always better to beg and gravel. It is much wiser to give your enemies all that you own and cherish, then risk death. Liberty and justice are so over-rated, better to live as a slave than be killed standing up for what you believe.

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I'm sorry, I must have been living under a rock. When, exactly, have Americans died for Israel?

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Why Comrade, that's simple! Anytime an American soldier sets foot on Middle East soil in this

Illegal, Immoral, Unjustified War,
and is killed for his pains, he is dying for the Zionist Entity! I mean, we all agree as collectivists that there should be a Palestinian state that's as big as it can be to rein in that Jewish Hegemon...

So, to review, dying in the middle east is dying for Israel. I think.

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The artical said "President Carter", is James still president?

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Ex-presidents carry the title for life. And into the history books, for that matter.

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But the Party determines how long a life....and history of course,

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O.K. I was just wondering what the Current Truth®©∞ was.

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UPDATE: The Zionists are destroying Commissar Carter's work as we group speak.

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I live in Israel. I can't believe how my country can do that. It's like Hitler. How could they come to these peaceful terrorists and kill them? Don't they know the human right of throwing Qassams at Jews?

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And why can't the evil Zionists fight fairly using homemade unguided rockets like the peace loving Hamas does? It is not fair! And we value fairness above just about everything!

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Good ol' homemade grenades, for Party Greatness! By the way Marshal, why not just supply Hamas with the weaponry of the Zionists?

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Hamas must be supported in their glorious revolution againsts the Zionist puppets of terror Bush Regime! Send your underwear to Comrade Carter to bandage the many thousand innocent Palistinian victims. Call for Comrade Obama to enforce a cease fire to allow Comrade Carter to rebuild their homes.

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Greetings Comrade_Androgynov,
Welcome to our Progressive website, please report to your local Commisar and bring a shovel and warm cloths. Oh yes, one more thing, make sure those shovels are sharp.

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I agree Israel should give Hamas their weapons for fairness. I heard Israel got nukes. How about giving Hamas nukes? Now that would be fair. It doesn't matter if Hamas is going to kill a bunch of innocent Jews. Keep fairness alive.

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Maybe if we are lucky, Hamas with nukes would blow away all of Israel, than start on crapitalists nations and those who are unProgressive.

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I also heard that Comrade Carter is starting a new venture: Killer Rabbit Hutches for Humanity, which will help contain the rampant water-walking killer rabbit problem that he continues to face.

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I might die if they nuke us. But it's for The Greater Good(tm) so it must be ok.

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The Skinnee Jay wrote:I might die if they nuke us. But it's for The Greater Good(tm) so it must be ok.

Skinnee Jay,

I was about to make a funny(?) post to this thread, when I saw your message.

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It must be quite nerve racking to be close to the war zone. I do have sympathy, and wish that there was a clear-cut solution to this terrible stalemate. But, please take heart, comrade. There are many supporters (not just Jews) in the USA, and our government will continue to help find an answer, hopefully without having to blow up half of the Middle East.

I don't know if that helps or not, but feel somewhat safe in the current truth that the USA will fully support Israel, should it come down to taking sides. Israel is a member of NATO, and so far, the USA does, and will defend their fellow NATO members. I seriously don't know what will happen when Obama takes over, but I hope for the best.

Anyone else want to jump in here?

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Comrade Krotchsky wrote:I also heard that Comrade Carter is starting a new venture: Killer Rabbit Hutches for Humanity, which will help contain the rampant water-walking killer rabbit problem that he continues to face.

Welcome to the Cube Comrade Krotchsky,

I hope that Comrade Carter has better success with the Killer Rabbit Hutches for Humanity than he did with Habitat for Humanity:

Charity homes built by Hollywood start to crumble
John Harlow in Los Angeles

RESIDENTS of a model housing estate bankrolled by Hollywood celebrities and hand-built by Jimmy Carter, the former US president, are complaining that it is falling apart.
Fairway Oaks was built on northern Florida wasteland by 10,000 volunteers, including Carter, in a record 17-day “blitz” organised by the charity Habitat for Humanity.
Eight years later it is better known for cockroaches, mildew and mysterious skin rashes.
A forthcoming legal battle over Fairway Oaks threatens the reputation of a charity envied for the calibre of its celebrity supporters, who range from Johnny Depp and Brad Pitt to Colin Firth, Christian Bale and Helena Bonham Carter.
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The case could challenge the bedrock philosophy behind Habitat for Humanity, claiming that using volunteers, rather than professional builders, is causing as many problems as it solves.
April Charney, a lawyer representing many of the 85 homeowners in Fairway Oaks, said she had no problems taking on Habitat for Humanity, despite its status as a “darling of liberal social activists”. She said the charity should have told people that part of the estate had been built on a rubbish dump.
One man pulled up his floorboards to find rubbish 5ft deep under his kitchen. Other complaints include cracking walls and rotting door frames that let in rats and ants. Many residents have complained of mildew and mysterious skin rashes.
One resident said her children were suffering from skin complaints. “The intentions are good, but when the politicians and big-shot stars have left we're stuck with the consequences. This house looks pretty but inside it either stinks or sweats,” she said.
Judy Hall, the charity's local development director, said recently that it had been dealing with about 30 complaints. She added that skilled work was carried out by professionals.
Some residents dismiss their neighbours' worries. Diennal Fields, 51, said people did not know how to look after their homes: “It's simple stuff: if there is mildew, don't get a lawyer, get a bottle of bleach.” January 4, 2009, The Sunday Edition, NYT
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Alright, who forgot the nails?

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Che Gourmet wrote:
The Skinnee Jay wrote:I might die if they nuke us. But it's for The Greater Good(tm) so it must be ok.

Skinnee Jay,

I was about to make a funny(?) post to this thread, when I saw your message.

Image

It must be quite nerve racking to be close to the war zone. I do have sympathy, and wish that there was a clear-cut solution to this terrible stalemate. But, please take heart, comrade. There are many supporters (not just Jews) in the USA, and our government will continue to help find an answer, hopefully without having to blow up half of the Middle East.

I don't know if that helps or not, but feel somewhat safe in the current truth that the USA will fully support Israel, should it come down to taking sides. Israel is a member of NATO, and so far, the USA does, and will defend their fellow NATO members. I seriously don't know what will happen when Obama takes over, but I hope for the best.

Anyone else want to jump in here?

(off)
I'll be more than happy to Che Gourmet.

As we both know, Israel is the only ally America has in the Middle East. Why do I say only, because if the President (Obama) sticks to his plan, and Congress acts, well, Iraq is going down in flames.

Back to Israel, you are right, if it ever came time to take sides and fight for or agaist Israel, America would definitly take sides with Israel. They are helping us in Iraq, they helped us in Desert Storm, and as such, we owe them.

The more I think about it, I think the Israel/Palistine conflict is a lot like an East v. West match up. Think about it, the ideas of the West (Israel) meet here agaist the East (Palistine). Here is the worst part though, Palistine could get its own state, and both sides would probably continue to fight.

I'll get back to you, but I really need to go.

Israel for the win!

When Commrade Jimmy finishes with his Freedom Fighters for Islam assistance in Gaza, will someone ask him to come back here and fix this bloody leak in the sewer drain here in the Lubianka?

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(off)

I kind of posted my message in a dark comedy version, but I'm still happy to see all the support. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, y'know. Anyway, yeah, the Palestine-Israel conflict is pretty much West Vs. East. Israel must win because it's probably the first state that was born with the values of (true) liberation, democracy and equality. Seriously, we have trips to see all kinds of different people in Israel-Christians, Druze and yes, Muslims. But, the world loves to hate the west. Crimes of the past are still being shoved down our throat while we have to suffer 9/11 and get the blame for it. Obama must choose Israel, because Hamas would be a totalitarian regime. I believe we all agreed Hitler, Stalin and Mussolini were bad guys, no?

Getting back to humor, I want this post updated with "IDF Wrecks Habitat For Hamas(tm)".

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The Skinnee Jay wrote:(off)

I kind of posted my message in a dark comedy version, but I'm still happy to see all the support. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, y'know. Anyway, yeah, the Palestine-Israel conflict is pretty much West Vs. East. Israel must win because it's probably the first state that was born with the values of (true) liberation, democracy and equality. Seriously, we have trips to see all kinds of different people in Israel-Christians, Druze and yes, Muslims. But, the world loves to hate the west. Crimes of the past are still being shoved down our throat while we have to suffer 9/11 and get the blame for it. Obama must choose Israel, because Hamas would be a totalitarian regime. I believe we all agreed Hitler, Stalin and Mussolini were bad guys, no?

Getting back to humor, I want this post updated with "IDF Wrecks Habitat For Hamas(tm)".
(off)
Lot's of people write in a satirical, dark comedy style on here. Even in character, they still will.

The majority of people on here will support Israel because we do realize its importance in the Middle East (except the Mime, but come on, we both know the answer he'll give.)

The reason the West is hated, is because it's succesful. Think about it, America is part of the West, Israel is part of the West, Western Europe is part of the West (though I'm a little reluctant to say so), what do these have in common, they are some of the most succesful nations of the world. The nations of the East are jelous of us, and as such, want what they don't what we have.

I'm surprised Israel is blamed for 9/11, because anyone with a memory longer than a goldfish (yes, there are people I've seen who have a memory the same span as a goldfish) knows it was Osama bin Ladin and his cronies who did it.

I don't know if Obama would choose Israel. Being as liberal as he is, I'd call into question his loyalty to his allies. Maybe I'm being a little over the top, but the problem is is we haven't seen him in action. However, as liberals talk, they just seem to want to see America fall to Hamas, the Taliban, al-Queda, Facists of any kind, etc. etc. etc.


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Scary. It's less funny when people start surpassing the satire, right?


 
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