The wild popularity of our Obama poster parodies has motivated us to create a set of playing cards for the toiling masses with these images, under the title "To each according to his hyphen" and the subtitle "Everybody is an equal winner."
Making 54 pictures in vector format took a lot of time, but the glorious news is that all these files are now also available for making high-resolution posters, T-shirts, and other revolutionary products.
Incorporating this project into the current Five Year Plan required an unparalleled effort and sacrifice from all comrades in Central Planning and Visual Agitation Departments. Striving to meet the quota ahead of schedule we didn't spare creativity in implementing a series of motivational purges, denunciations, deportations, and executions. But despite such selfless efforts, the backstabbing capitalist saboteurs still managed to delay our shipment and we received the final product only this afternoon, which makes it too late for the Winter Solstice Holiday online shopping - but just in time for the New Year shopping!
Giving us your money is patriotic!
Obama Playing Cards
Poker size (2.5" x 3.5")
Premium 280 Paper Playing Card Stock with Plastic Coating
Our great leader has again identified a need within the collective and met it with creative genius. We salute you, Cube One!
As Commissar of Motherland Security, I will immediately requisition 200,000 decks to supply air raid shelters and Chicago elementary schools with politically reliable entertainment. My personal favorites: IRON, CASH, BITTER and FATHER!
I am humbled by your inclusion of the Che' in your superb deck of playing cards. As a revolutionary of the people, I have been honored numerous times. Your homage to my marketing skills is somewhat misplaced, however. The Visual Agitation Department and Central PLanning has done all of the work, and therefore must receive all of the profits. I say, use my likeness for any purpose the Party wishes. I plan to order some posters for the restaurant. Do they come framed, or have you a recommended vendor who could do this? KUDOS to you and your hardworking associates, Sir.
As a prole from the great socialist republic of Minnesota I'd offer this character for the Joker card...
(*can't do the red blue and pumice thing so please help me and I will continue to dig this trench*)
This is an amazing collection you have here Red I Vladimir Toot'en am proud, and approve distribution of this merchandise.
All profits go to me.
AbecedariusRex wrote
As a prole from the great socialist republic of Minnesota I'd offer this character for the Joker card...
(*can't do the red blue and pumice thing so please help me and I will continue to dig this trench*)
Red missed that one that would be a great Joker card.
HEY!! Wait a minute, There are only four aces!!
They will never be accepted in Chicagograd.
Use Gov Blaggo as the 5th ACE?? Why not add a whole NEW suit ?? Clubs-Diamonds-Hearts-Spades AND Acorns ??
If the King of Diamonds card in your deck becomes torn (or even more worn out from old age) and needs replaced, prehaps Red Cube would consider the following suggestion:
Very amusing. I don't know if I should laugh or cry. Bernie said I should go slumming here. You little people are so, ummm..., lowbrow and oafish - in a nice way. Playing cards, gambling, lots of cheap gin and malt liquor too, no doubt. Oh well. You don't need to live lives of poverty and despair any longer. We have resumed our rightful place.
I have humble suggestion, if you plan a second printing to update your marvelous card deck that you revise the Jack of Spades. Though Scranton is a nice touch, the revisionist suggestion below may be a little more apropos………
I love this deck comrade, however, I must ask why are there RethugliKKKans in this deck. Aren't we a progressive collection for a greater cause?
The actual reason Big Red put Repugnicans in the mix is for a "Manchurian Candidate" style revolution. When one of these cards is observed by the victim operative, he / she / transgendered or whatever will do anything it is programmed to do.
I must say they have been cooking up some pretty powerful drugs medications for those who are so willing to sacrifice for the common good. Their numbers names will live on in history as great revolutionaries.
Very amusing. I don't know if I should laugh or cry. Bernie said I should go slumming here. You little people are so, ummm..., lowbrow and oafish - in a nice way. Playing cards, gambling, lots of cheap gin and malt liquor too, no doubt. Oh well. You don't need to live lives of poverty and despair any longer. We have resumed our rightful place.
Hey, Queenie Weenie! Welcome to El Cubo Populo. Anytime you want to eat a little soul food, your honkeyship, just let me know.
"Everybody is an equal winer!" (Suitable for playing in a box car with other political prisoners)
So when did Party decide playing cards in train acceptable?
Ref: Truman Capote's vile lies in his piece "The Muses are Heard" about the US "Porgy & Bess" tour of Glorious Russian motherland in 1955....
I do not claim to be a winer equal to Ted Kennedy (though my boozing days greatly surpassed the most liquescent exploits of some teetotallers within the beltway)
This is an amazing collection you have here Red I Vladimir Toot'en am proud, and approve distribution of this merchandise.
All profits go to me.
AbecedariusRex wrote
As a prole from the great socialist republic of Minnesota I'd offer this character for the Joker card...
(*can't do the red blue and pumice thing so please help me and I will continue to dig this trench*)
Red missed that one that would be a great Joker card.
Comrade Franken would be a great addition to the deck. But wouldn't he just demand recounts on why he ended up on the card he did? What about those additional decks of cards he may claim are in a voting location?
I know I said in my previous post of "redone" cards purloined from the masterful original deck that it would be my last. However, I was motivated by Red Square to look up and study the cast of characters on the cards that I was not very familiar with. Soros was one that I admit I didn't know well, other than he was filthy rich.
What I found looking around was quite an eye-opener and it is a true testament to the Ministry of MiS-Information's Mission (MSM) of keeping the facts generic and suppressed.
Though the title of Red Square's Soros' card "Cash" is both accurate and succinct, after a little reasearch I feel that the card below might sum it up better......
Buenas Dias comrade and a merry Winter Solstice Holiday (Gaia be praised) to you!
I do hope you are not defaming (but only honoring) our own Daddy Warbucks, i.e.: the "good" George? He is indeed the model that all progressives should emulate.
While the writer in the aforementioned artilce is literally, quite talented, with the absolute power that the George wields, the blasphemous traitor won't have too long to live in our World of This Tuesday! Soros is our global ambassator, and held in very high regard by the Party.
Viva La' Revolution, comrade Robot! I must now go and prepare a feast of epic proportions to feed the Inner Circle!
I do hope you are not defaming (but only honoring) our own Daddy Warbucks, i.e.: the "good" George? He is indeed the model that all progressives should emulate.
Che Gourmet!
You misunderstood me!
I was um, um…(gulp)..in no way impugning (gulp!) Grand Marshal $oros’s good name. I am so sorry that it might have appeared that way. Perhaps it was too much Egg-Nog (party approved of course) last night.
I salute the Ministry of MiS Information’s Mission (MSM) for being the Vanguard of the people and letting us know only what we should and need to know!
I denounce the writer of that worthless, slanderous and factless blog as an enemy of the People’s Democracy ™ !! The similarity between $oros’s previous manipulation of the British and Thailand’s government and then the subsequent crash of their stock markets making him billions of dollars is entirely coincidental and should in no way be inferred with his current support of Dear Leader!
I shall have front row seats for the event in our World of This Tuesday, despite the fact that there won’t be any where near enough porta-potties for the masses! This proves my unflagging devotion to the Party.
As a prole from the great socialist republic of Minnesota I'd offer this character for the Joker card...
(*can't do the red blue and pumice thing so please help me and I will continue to dig this trench*)
come on...we all know you Photoshopped™ this. Nobody is that ugly in real life.
As a prole from the great socialist republic of Minnesota I'd offer this character for the Joker card...
(*can't do the red blue and pumice thing so please help me and I will continue to dig this trench*)
come on...we all know you Photoshopped™ this. Nobody is that ugly in real life.
No, he is.
I did photoshop it a little bit, though; see above.
This Current TruthTM post is like crack or meth once you start you just can't leave it alone.
Full appologies to Red Square but his Queen of Hearts in my opinion was just not quite accurate enough with the title Glass Ceiling and did not clearly reflect her performance during the recent presidential campaign season. The poorly doctored card below is my re-interpretation......
How do you guys make these posters? I really wish someone made one with Joseph Heller's picture, and wrote "Catch-22" under it. It would definitely be great. An Osama picture with "Peace", "Liberty" or "Freedom" would be good too. If you know what I mean. If some makes the Heller one for me, I'd like it without a card.
I guess I don't know why he would get his own card. The best one in the playing deck to get the title of "Catch 22" in my opinion would be McCain. He sure beats Obama but a "Catch 22" would be what you would get having a Moderate Republican at the helm classically: "you're damned if you do and damned if you don't" (i.e. stuck with Obama).........
Then The Red Square will recognize Joseph Heller's face. A face of the actor of the film that plays Yossarian could be cool too. I prefer Heller's though.
Red Square! Your 8 of Clubs will likely be ringing a different tune after Jan 20, 2009!
(PS: Sorry for the inexcusably poor Hack-Job on your most excellent card deck!)
Hey, if The Skinnee Jay gets his own card with Joseph Heller on it, then I want one with Danielle Steel--what's that, is there an echo in here? And how dare you ask why!
Don't give me any lip about how no one here knows who Danielle is or what she looks like--I know, and that's all that matters, dammit!
And what do you mean, "How does she fit in with the rest of the cards?" Who says she has to? The Card Fairy? I say she doesn't, because I'M PINKIE OBAMA! Dammit!
And another thing. You put a plastic dish of M & M's on my dressing table this evening. I specifically said I wanted them served in Waterford crystal ONLY, dammit! Plus you forgot to remove all the orange M & M's--AGAIN! Now I'll have nothing but bad karma till the next full moon.
For that matter, so will you.
Don't forget what happened the last time you tried telling me you have a life "too" like you think you're as equal as I am.
I'll be back on Monday with an even longer list of unreasonable demands, so get cracking. Do I have to do everything around here?
Hey, if The Skinnee Jay gets his own card with Joseph Heller on it, then I want one with Danielle Steel--what's that, is there an echo in here? And how dare you ask why!
Don't give me any lip about how no one here knows who Danielle is or what she looks like--I know, and that's all that matters, dammit!
And what do you mean, "How does she fit in with the rest of the cards?" Who says she has to? The Card Fairy? I say she doesn't, because I'M PINKIE OBAMA! Dammit!
And another thing. You put a plastic dish of M & M's on my dressing table this evening. I specifically said I wanted them served in Waterford crystal ONLY, dammit! Plus you forgot to remove all the orange M & M's--AGAIN! Now I'll have nothing but bad karma till the next full moon.
For that matter, so will you.
Don't forget what happened the last time you tried telling me you have a life "too" like you think you're as equal as I am.
I'll be back on Monday with an even longer list of unreasonable demands, so get cracking. Do I have to do everything around here?
I heard M&M is a big bad corporation. I hope you know what that means. Also, only The Red Square's voice counts because he got The Voice of The People. I'm still gonna get my Heller card because Red Square <3 Skinnee Jay.
Does the Sharp Shovel of Collective Correction have a People's Red Revolutionary Stick of Justice as a handle? I really need to get authorization to make a factory to produce those and come up with a five year plan for production!
Commissarka Pinkie, I do apologize missing your adopting the name of Pinkie Obama. The Cube is a big and wondrous thing and I spend all of my time with my legs crossed in a mantra position saying, "My legs aren't like this to protect the family jewels but because it's Marx..hum..Engels..hum..Mao...hum...Soros...hum...Zinn...hum...Algore...hum"
When you do that much creative meditating you are sure to miss things.
I'm not quite sure though how you're Pinkie Obama. Was this a special dispensation from Rev. Jeremiah Wright in the few milliseconds when he was not saying, "God DAMN America!"? I'd think that Missy Michelle might not like the suggestion that His O'liness had two Hos for O.
Where is my card? The most important card in the deck, you idiot! You have a short memory! Come and dine with me, I will help you get your memory refreshment, uh, refreshed.
This is what goes on the damn card!
His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshall Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC ['Victorious Cross'], DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Sea and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular, and Professor of Geography.
I heard M&M is a big bad corporation. I hope you know what that means. Also, only The Red Square's voice counts because he got The Voice of The People. I'm still gonna get my Heller card because Red Square <3 Skinnee Jay.
Spare me your petty distractions from The Real Issues, Skinnee Jay.
Yes, I eat M & M's a couple of times a year, and I feel horribly guilty about it, just as I feel guilty about plagiarizing the words of others like Laurie David. I probably shouldn't do it. But the truth is, I'm not perfect. This is not about perfection. I don't expect anyone else to be perfect either. That's what hurts the Progressive Movement--holding people to a standard they cannot meet. That just pushes people away.
The important thing is that I care about the issues that matter--the right to abortion, opposition to the Iraq war, and undying hatred of Bush. In fact, I have worked tirelessly to Raise Awareness about the issues that matter, to show the world just how much I care. That's the hardest, bravest, most patriotic thing in the world to do, Skinnee Jay, and all you can do is snipe at me for eating M & M's. It's easy to just stand around and criticize others; whereas it takes great courage to do what I'm doing to take our country back from the irreversible destruction Bush has wrought. Yes, even as I sit here eating my M & M's, I'm always thinking of how he's destroyed the world forever, and because of that I must never give up Raising Awareness of The One's promise to deliver us from the evil that is Bush.
Now, Skinnee Jay, do you have anything of substance to contribute to this discussion?
Pinkie, do you eat Fair Trade peanut M&Ms? You must be sure that the peanuts were grown by unionized labor, unless they came off Parson Carter's farm and then they're okay.
Is that a trick you learned from Our Many Titted Empress? You know, after the Clintons had their dog Buddy neutered we didn't hear a great deal about the Presidential Pecker and then he had a heart problem. The rhubarb was that Hillary had found a two-for-one sale.
Theocritus, as you know I was a faithful Hillary Operative until The One descended from above, so I'm no longer that kind of HO. I am now a Hussie for Obama, but I will not hesitate to use the lessons I learned from the Empress in defense and praise of His 'Oly Name.
Skinnee Jay: Nice avatar. Would you be one of the Sailor Scouts? I thought they all disbanded to join the Obama Youth so they could use their special powers to spread Hope and Change throughout the universe.
And if it means you're a gurl, then that will greatly excite The Man With The Hand That Holds The Cube. He tends to drop it with a great surprised clunk every time a new female wanders into The Collective.
I heard M&M is a big bad corporation. I hope you know what that means. Also, only The Red Square's voice counts because he got The Voice of The People. I'm still gonna get my Heller card because Red Square <3 Skinnee Jay.
Spare me your petty distractions from The Real Issues, Skinnee Jay.
Yes, I eat M & M's a couple of times a year, and I feel horribly guilty about it, just as I feel guilty about plagiarizing the words of others like Laurie David. I probably shouldn't do it. But the truth is, I'm not perfect. This is not about perfection. I don't expect anyone else to be perfect either. That's what hurts the Progressive Movement--holding people to a standard they cannot meet. That just pushes people away.
The important thing is that I care about the issues that matter--the right to abortion, opposition to the Iraq war, and undying hatred of Bush. In fact, I have worked tirelessly to Raise Awareness about the issues that matter, to show the world just how much I care. That's the hardest, bravest, most patriotic thing in the world to do, Skinnee Jay, and all you can do is snipe at me for eating M & M's. It's easy to just stand around and criticize others; whereas it takes great courage to do what I'm doing to take our country back from the irreversible destruction Bush has wrought. Yes, even as I sit here eating my M & M's, I'm always thinking of how he's destroyed the world forever, and because of that I must never give up Raising Awareness of The One's promise to deliver us from the evil that is Bush.
Now, Skinnee Jay, do you have anything of substance to contribute to this discussion?
Anything?
Anything at all?
Woops. I thought progress was supposed to be perfect. I mean, didn't Karl Marx wanted a perfect society? However, I do understand your problems. I will also Raise wareness and protest against Bush. I bet Da Mamba KKKonspirasi was his fault.
Oh and sorry for double-post, but yeah. He played Yossaria. I checked it at Wikipedia.
Gloriousl! Our proles are using the NewsSpeak Creation "WIKI" (Worthless Information Knowingly Inserted) system and feeling very confident concerning the answers obtained there. Yet another hard won victory for the Party and the Ministry of MiS-Information's Mission (MSM).
The Wikipedia has Commandant Gore listed as a Harvard cum laude graduate despite his many C grades and a D in earth science. When Harvard was asked about it, they stated he did have a cum laude average in his Government Classes. Another great example of DoubleSpeak. Truly we are winning this war.....
Woops. I thought progress was supposed to be perfect. I mean, didn't Karl Marx wanted a perfect society? However, I do understand your problems. I will also Raise wareness and protest against Bush. I bet Da Mamba KKKonspirasi was his fault.
Today's Modern Progressives uh De Party (should be trademarked fo' socialism soon) duzn't hold demselves down t'puh'fecshun. Dat would interfere wid de feelin's uh de Victim Class dat we's depend downon fo' unquesshunin' suppo't. Man! So's whut if Bill lied unda' oad in sexual harassment law suit; dat's about sex, and we all honky jibe about sex. Right? Feel bettah? ah' do. 'S coo', bro. Only de O'ly One be puh'fect, as long as we's feel pimp-tight about his intenshuns.
Now, we's do hold conservatives down t'de standard uh puh'fecshun. If ya' even tap yo' toes in de men's room, den ya' iz EBIL and gots'ta end yo' life. Dat be why Bu$hitla' be so's hated by de baaaad feelin' folks uh Today's Modern Progressives uh De PartyTM--CUZ BUSH WON'T UHF HISELF WHEN WE (Party members, intellectuals, and media o'gans) TELLS HIM DAT HE BE EBIL. Feel pissed about Bush? See dat gots'ta all make sense; if not stand in Jiffy-Lobo line.
NEXT FOO' brace yourself!
(Today's Modern Progressives of The Party (should be trademarked for socialism soon) don't hold themselves up to perfection. That would interfere with the feelings of the Victim Class that we depend upon for unquestioning support. So what if Bill lied under oath in sexual harassment law suit; that's about sex, and we all lie about sex. Right? Feel better? I do. Only the O'ly One is perfect, as long as we feel good about his intentions.
Now, we do hold conservatives up to the standard of perfection. If you even tap your toes in the men's room, then you are EVIL and must end your life. That is why Bu$hitler is so hated by the good feeling folks of Today's Modern Progressives of The PartyTM--BECAUSE BUSH WON'T OFF HIMSELF WHEN WE (Party members, intellectuals, and media organs) TELL HIM THAT HE IS EVIL. Feel enraged about Bush? See it will all make sense; if not stand in Jiffy-Lobo line.
NEXT PATIENT PLEASE.)
Da Peeps' Rapper
Comrade C2G хулиганье
And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.
Wait. You're saying we're not perfect because we are the Victim class? Oh I see. We support the Victim class. However, we can't support the Victim class if they're not victims right? Oh I see! Then what do you think of what Israel is doing right now against the HamAss?
Oh, and can anyone tell me how to do that "TM" thing? Thanks for sharing!
Skinnee Jay, we support victims if we can't claim to be victims. It's much better to be a vicim than anything else, unless you can support victims and then get to say who gets to do what, and the power is better than the misery memoir. I mean, what would you prefer: having wounds or selling the gauze and antiseptic and making other people pay for it?
Hamas is good because when Hamas tries to blow up Israelis and they screw up and get hurt and try to go back to Palestine, the Palestinians won't have them and the Israeli hospitals treat the people who tried to kill them.
That makes Hamas good and Israel bad. Get it?
Remember: actions do not have direct consequences.
I'll bet you're really happy that Comrade Dr. Strangelove gave you a translator for the Solstice Holiday. I know I am. Is it derived from Swahili? Our Obamessiah speaks this dialect too,(as do all Kenyans) Has Commissar Theocritis tossed some bling your way, yet for your tireless promotion of his new $$$ grabbing scheme?
And Comrade Skinnee Jay, what is this bullshit about our glorious Red Square 's <3 than you?
You had better watch what you say about our wonderful Red Trapezoid! He wields the biggest, baddest shovel of all in the collective, prole!
We must also hate Israel for their very large number of entrepreneurs, their start-ups, and their technology. They design silicon chips, the same ones that Palestinians used in computers to get calling lists to call Americans to get them to vote for his O'liness. Who seems to be staffing his cabinet with people with no use for Israel. But since American Jews voted 81% for the Obamessiah, no doubt that will all turn around just fine.
Oh yeah I forgot. Israel is civilized-we should be progressive and go back to living in the nature. Like in "Lord of the Flies" right? Ralph is just a turd there. Jack was amazing. He sure supported freedom and equality and got rid of anyone who resisted.
Our teacher made us read that book, by the way. I live in Israel, so maybe it isn't so good if an Israeli teacher told you to read it.
You live in Israel? How can you have sympathy with the downtrodden? Your hospitals serve all sick people. You have an actual democracy. That is not the right thing for a progressive leading us to the Progressive World of Next Tuesday.
For this you are sentenced to cleaning off the remnants of the talent-shitting bird on the Rancho de Rio Grande.
Skinnee Jay, we support victims if we can't claim to be victims. It's much better to be a vicim than anything else, unless you can support victims and then get to say who gets to do what, and the power is better than the misery memoir. I mean, what would you prefer: having wounds or selling the gauze and antiseptic and making other people pay for it?
Yo G,
Mah' favo'ite be when we's make da damn victims; blame da damn evil conservatives; gain powa' ta suppo't da damn victims; make mo'e victims wiff dat power; and den snatch mo'al credit fo' wheelsin` fo' da victims. Liberal job security, cuz' we's wheelse. Yo knows das right!
(My favorite is when we make the victims; blame the evil conservatives; gain power to support the victims; make more victims with that power; and then take moral credit for caring for the victims. Liberal job security, because we care.)
Che Gourmet wrote
I'll bet you're really happy that Comrade Dr. Strangelove gave you a translator for the Solstice Holiday. I know I am. Is it derived from Swahili? Our Obamessiah speaks this dialect too,(as do all Kenyans) Has Commissar Theocritis tossed some bling your way, yet for your tireless promotion of his new $$$ grabbing scheme?
Yo G!
Ah' love muh ma fuckin translator. Ah' gots 'ta run dat dree times, ghetto-jibe-ebonics, ta dig dat ta mossey on down out solid. Ah' ain't takin' nahh sheeit fo' bling from Commissar Theocritis. Ah' do owe him fo' muh ma fuckin life. When muh ma fuckin community o'ganization skills failed ta win Texas fo' his O'ly'ness, Ah' wuz marked fo' de end. Brotha Deo gots me uh gig as uh gang-banger. Ah be baad... Now Ah' snatch steady bre'd fo' da system subsidies as uh puh'fomin' rappa, as long as I duzn' really rap. Don't make me come ovah there bitch...
(I love my translator. I have to run it through three times, ghetto-jive-ebonics, to get it to come out right. I haven't receivedanything from Commissar Theocritis. I do owe him for my life. When my community organization skills failed to win Texas for his O'ly'ness, I was marked for termination. Brother Theo got me a gig as a gang-banger. Now I take steady money for government subsidies as a performing rap artist, as long as I don't really rap.)
Da Peeps' Rapper
Comrade C2G хулиганье
And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.
You live in Israel? How can you have sympathy with the downtrodden? Your hospitals serve all sick people. You have an actual democracy. That is not the right thing for a progressive leading us to the Progressive World of Next Tuesday.
For this you are sentenced to cleaning off the remnants of the talent-shitting bird on the Rancho de Rio Grande.
I don't have sympathy for Israel. Famous bands come here. Anime community is evolving and Mangas are being sold without censorship. Library contains offensive books as "Slaughterhouse-Five" and there are attractions for gamers. I won't even go to the technology. It's a disgusting place. I can't write anymore. Not enough people pick a shovel and support true freedom. They just follow their hobbies and actually do something with their lives. Unlike ol' great HamAss.
I'm glad to find that you care nothing for Israel. You're quite right: shovels over research. Democracy over strapping bombs to retarded women. I bet you can't find a single Israeli willing to strap a bomb on his one-year-old child.
Let me correct you: Strapping bombs to retarded women over democracy. Sadly, Israelis around me value their lives more than the lives of a Hamasnic who wants to kill them.
Oh, and can anyone tell me how to do that "TM" thing? Thanks for sharing!
You type ( tm ) without spaces. It will automatically be replaced by ™ once you hit "enter". Any time you're curious about an element in the post, click on "quote" and examine the resulting code.
Oh, and I changed your avatar, The Skinnee Jay, to make it more compliant with the our revolutionary ideals: big red bows on top and big red D-cups on the chest. That is our standard for female comrades unless you are part of the Breasts Not Bombs collective; those have the Party permission to parade around without the big red D-cups on the chest - or any other cups for that matter.
Also, please don't resize. Thanks, comrade!
Edit: There's something wrong with posting links. So you'll have to copy-paste it. I isolated it to make it easier for you comrade. Thanks for Sharing™.
A URL converts automatically to a link if it's preceded by other characters, but it doesn't if it starts a paragraph. So placing a dash or another character followed by space before the URL helps to turn it into a link.
I may do your request some other day when I have more free time. But you must justify the relevance of such work to advancing the Party cause, class struggle, and establishing the proletarian dictatorship. At this point the only connection I can see is weakening of the conservative bourgeois morals through pedophilia.
It will help us because the cuteness will provoke more people to join the party. They can be good mascots. Some people may not be attracted by Karl Marx or Che Guevara.
Skinnee Jay: Are you suggesting we attract more male comrades to the Party by making them think they'll get to romp around with hot commie babes who look like this?
The guys go to bed with you, but they wake up with me.
Skinnee Jay: Are you suggesting we attract more male comrades to the Party by making them think they'll get to romp around with hot commie babes who look like this?
{{{insert pedophiliac encouraging image of polythene girl/women in skimpy clothing here.}}}
The guys go to bed with you, but they wake up with me.
Comrades! These inflatable units need to be distributed equally to all party members. I know of a few comrades in Japan who even now are moving to be married to their cartoon character of choice. This would be the ideal for the new model of marriage in the world of next Tuesday. If the spousal unit were to offend physically or emotionally, out comes the eraser and all is well; no cartoon, no problem, I say! Slaves and repositories of lust with only the stroke of a pen. Perhaps the ONE™ could add this to his burgeoning agenda of important issues. Ten cartoon women to every man, mr. president.
Anime industry is on it's way to Capitalism™. I simply suggest using these too before the whole industry gets corrupt. Just like we use Chrismas to destroy the capitalist Christians, we shall use these 2 to destroy the capitalist Anime industry.
Betty, I'm disappointed, but hardly surprised, that the only thing you would notice are breasts--or in the case of the breast-challenged girl, the lack of them. For you failed to notice her most important features--the long donkey ears and tail signifying that she is well on her way to becoming a Party member.
Ever wonder how kids grow up to be good liberal Democrats, Party of the Donkey? May I present for your consideration Disney's Pinocchio:
Quote
The segment from Pleasure Island in the film version is much more of a morality tale. The boys who are taken to the island go voluntarily with the promise of fun and unlimited freedom. While on the island, the children are encouraged to commit acts of vandalism, fight, drink beer, smoke cigars, and gamble - all things that good little boys are not supposed to do. The nature of the coachman and of Pleasure Island itself is shown as more preternatural and inherently evil.
The transformation into a donkey is not instantaneous. When boys arrive on the island, they remain human for some time before showing any signs of the curse changing them. The first indication is braying replacing the boy's normal laughter, followed by the growth of donkey ears and a tail. The head, torso, and extremities come next, after which the boy is then forced into a quadrupedial stance. The final notable change is losing the ability to speak. Before the donkeys leave Pleasure Island, they are checked to make sure they have lost their ability to vocalize, which signifies they are fully transformed.
When The Coachman tests out the donkeys, he does many things to them. The ones that cannot longer vocalize are stripped bare of their clothes and chucked into wooden crates to salt mines or circuses. The ones that can talk are taken back to a pen where other talking donkeys plead for mercy. The Coachman has to either keep them on the island until they lose their vocalization or their death.
Ever wonder how kids grow up to be good liberal Democrats, Party of the Donkey? May I present for your consideration Disney's Pinocchio
Pinkie! This is exactly the story I told my children trying to explain the need to stay in school and not falling into the temptations around them before they grow up. But did they listen? The Coachman always seems more trustworthy than the parents. Just tell me where I can find that Coachman, I'd hate to hit the wrong guy. Something tells me he looks a bit like these two:
Dear comrade The Red Square!
Please use that color job on the whole picture
Call me old fashioned, I kind of like the psychedelic look:
You're old-fashioned. I'm still waiting for comrade Red Square to do the whole color job for me. Cuteness is capitalism, so I want to at least get these 2 approved by the party before cuteness gets completely exploited by capitalism (Anime industry).
Also, Pinkie, it's good that Betty focuses on the breast. Cuteness is capitalism. Porn is liberation. I have proof:
Dear comrade The Red Square!
Please use that color job on the whole picture
Call me old fashioned, I kind of like the psychedelic look:
You're old-fashioned. I'm still waiting for comrade Red Square to do the whole color job for me. Cuteness is capitalism, so I want to at least get these 2 approved by the party before cuteness gets completely exploited by capitalism (Anime industry).
Also, Pinkie, it's good that Betty focuses on the breast. Cuteness is capitalism. Porn is liberation. I have proof:
Just look how conservative the whole site is! In our free world, we should let sex material spread so people will see we support freedom of speech!
Oh and it's not donkey ears. Robotic ears or something. I'll look for more information.
COMRADE RED SQUARE. I'LL BE WAITING.
Hey PROLE!
You will be waiting a long time for our glorious Red Square to fulfill your silly requests! And your insolence is appalling! How dare you speak to our SUPREME LEADER, (get that prole?) this way!!
Report to the train station immediately! Bring shovel, warm clothes and a copy of the Party Manifesto! You will be taken to the KMTC for evaluation. Pending diagnosis, you will shovel Permafrost until you understand that one must grovel before your Party Elite, or risk dire consequences!
No one cares about your prostituting ways, and besides, Larry Flynt is gonna get bailout money any day now, so the Anime Industry is in no danger of censorship. Everyone knows that Comrade Flynt is a beacon of the 1st Ammendment!
Your re-education starts now, prole! Get moving!
NOTE to Inner Circle: Report the SkinneeJay for further actions to be taken
Che' Gourmet
Uber-Commissar of Foodservice
Executive Chef to the Inner Circle
Executive Chef of Lucretia's, the People's Restaurant
Recepient of the Order of Laika for Meritorious Service
I'm sorry for insolence. I didn't mean it. Can you please show me, so I won't repeat that thoughtcrime? Thanks!
Also, look at Japan=you see development. Development requires money. Money is capitalism. I still think Japan is one it's way to be the biggest thought crime ever. For now, I want to save a piece of it before it turn capitalist.
Anime industry=Capitalism in the making. Must reserve something.
I'm sorry for insolence. I didn't mean it. Can you please show me, so I won't repeat that thoughtcrime? Thanks!
Also, look at Japan=you see development. Development requires money. Money is capitalism. I still think Japan is one it's way to be the biggest thought crime ever. For now, I want to save a piece of it before it turn capitalist.
Anime industry=Capitalism in the making. Must reserve something.
Sorry again!
Skinnee Jay,
Comrade, SORRY is not good enough! I demand that you apologise to our most benevolent Leader for your disrespect. He is extremely busy, promoting the Partys' Agenda, and does not need you, lowly prole, taking for granted that he will jump when you state your petty wishes. Our dear Leader need not do anything of the sort!
He told you prole, to explain how your proposal will further the Partys' work.
Perhaps an essay, delivered to Red Square, personally, will appease him somewhat, considering that's all he asked of you. I would make sure that it contains every detail of your proposal, and especially, how much money you will pay for the license, which of course, may or may not be issued.
But there will be no arguments about your punishment! Report as ordered, NOW!
(Skinnee Jay, you will learn. All of us have had to wield the mighty shovel on occasion for our ThoughtCrimes, comrade, so don't fight it)
Speak for yourself. The more demonic of us never commit thoughtcrime.
Well, Hello there, Demon (Booo I'm so scared LOL)
Yes,I do speak for myself. So how goes the propaganda in merry ol' England, comrade? Or not? (See explanation below if you are confused, comrade:)
Are you referring to:
Behemoth was written in 1668 as a follow up to Hobbes' previous political work, Leviathan. Leviathan is a representation of an ideal political world and Behemoth has been considered to be a treatise on what happens when the very worst abuses of government come to pass.
or are you this Behemoth?(Final Fantasy Games)
Personally, I'd like to believe that you are the first choice (your politicalacumen would be appropriate at the Cube, comrade), but I suspect that you are the Anime power since you sympathize with Skinnee Jay. You should get together with our Premier Betty, who is definitely a fan of Anime.
Comrade Che Gourmet. If I pick a shovel and warm clothes, and go with them to school instead of our uniform, will I be forgiven? I, after all, support the part to the fullest. That's why I want mascots to help us spread it. No pressure on The Red Square though, he can do it whenever he got the time.
Comrade Che Gourmet. If I pick a shovel and warm clothes, and go with them to school instead of our uniform, will I be forgiven? I, after all, support the part to the fullest. That's why I want mascots to help us spread it. No pressure on The Red Square though, he can do it whenever he got the time.
Begging for your forgiveness...
Comrade Skinnee Jay,
That's right prole, anytime he wishes! I realize it must be tough getting to school these days, living in Israel (are they really making you go to school now??) so, I will consider commuting your punishment at the KMTC, but not until you apologize to our dear Leader, and do as HE commanded you! I know this sounds harsh, but he wants that proposal, or you will never see your "mascots," Kabeesh?
I have no problem with your zeal for the party, prole. We in the Inner Circle will be watching you, Skinnee Jay. Don't disappoint us.
No one cares about your prostituting ways, and besides, Larry Flynt is gonna get bailout money any day now, so the Anime Industry is in no danger of censorship. Everyone knows that Comrade Flynt is a beacon of the 1st Ammendment!
This is actually in the works:
Margaret wrote
By Margaret Thu Jan 08, 2009 11:43 am
Pleasure Island falls on hard times. The Coachman demands 5 Billion:
True. Anytime he wants-he shall do it. I will remind him from time to time-just in case he forgets. But I have full faith in the Red Square, and I hope to buy, I mean liberate a pack of these cards and a copy of The People's Cube (I'm not equal enough for the ORIGINAL Cube, which only The Red Square deserves to own).
I'd like to know how I can make amends. I'm already preparing my warm clothes and my shovel.
Yeah, I'm still being forced capitalistically to go to school. Hamas' messengers of peace (aka Qassams) don't come close to me area.
How do I line words? You know, like to erase them? Thanks!
True. Anytime he wants-he shall do it. I will remind him from time to time-just in case he forgets. But I have full faith in the Red Square, and I hope to buy, I mean liberate a pack of these cards and a copy of The People's Cube (I'm not equal enough for the ORIGINAL Cube, which only The Red Square deserves to own).
I'd like to know how I can make amends. I'm already preparing my warm clothes and my shovel.
Yeah, I'm still being forced capitalistically to go to school. Hamas' messengers of peace (aka Qassams) don't come close to me area.
How do I line words? You know, like to erase them? Thanks!
(hi-light the offensive words, then hit the square above that says abc)
OK Skinnee Jay, ONE MORE TIME!
Re-read my previous posts! I told you to write the proposal for your "mascots" and explain to Red Square, (Almighty, all knowing Leader) just why these mascots would be useful to the Party's agenda, and don't tell me again, how "cute" they are! Submit your proposal in triplicate, along with appropriate fees (cash or money order only) to Red Square's secretary (not just any secretary, prole, just one of her many important jobs!) Mrs. Pinkie O. She will process, and let you know if your proposal is acceptable, or not.
Next, and most importantly, APOLOGIZE TO OUR LEADER FOR YOUR IMPERTINENCE!
I do not need your apologies, prole. You did nothing to offend me. Now be a good comrade and pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and do the right thing! Agh.......kids!....don't they have ears to listen?...all they do is ask endless questions.....and can't follow simple instructions....glad I'm not a teacher.....pobres profesors....
PS: Red Square does not "own" the Cube. The Cube belongs to the People!
PSS: Comrade, I hope that this isn't an example of how you process your school studies?
Comrade Gourmet, I prefer The Red Square himself to ask me for an apology. Money might come soon. My capitalist parents control it. I might be able to use it to buy liberate these cards and a copy of The Cube™.
Explanation for mascots:
It is a picture of happy young girls. It coud be a window to how Marxism should would be. We need to find a way to appeal to the teenage market community. I believe this picture can be useful. Also, cute mascots didn't hurt anyone.
Oh thanks for letting be know about the line. Thanks for Sharing™.
May Lenin not roll over in his tomb!
Are you saying that your school is not Progressive? Your grammar and stubborness suggests that it is, but I will talk to Comrade Ayers and have him check out this travesty.
If the example you gave, (you call that a proposal?) is the best you can come up with, then only money will get you a slim chance to have your "mascots."
Just what do you mean you PREFER to wait for our Dear Leader to ask you for an apology? My air-brained comrade, I would not wait for that. Red Square keeps records of all conversations; he reviews them for content, daily. Although he is very patient with newbies, (oh yes, how Iremember), and I have tried to be, I doubt that he will stoop to your level. He has no need to grovel to any of us, including you, prole!
Since you refuse to kowtow to our Leader, I am reporting this transgression to the Inner Circle, immediately. Be aware comrade, they will not be as patient with you as I have been!
If you continue to refuse to submit to my admonishment, and proper re-education, then you shall be sent for a Jiffylobe appointment to give you a proper attitude adjustment. (Theo,here comes another one, don't forget my commission)
I wash my hands of any further involvement with this matter, prole. Since you did not heed my wise counsel on this, you will be, most likely, subjected to a Show Trial (that is if you are13 or older), and I don't believe a newbie has ever survived that!
The uncontested absurdities of today are the accepted slogans
of tomorrow. They come to be accepted by degrees, by precedent,
by implication, by erosion, by default, by dint of constant
pressure on one side and constant retreat on the other -
until the day when they are suddenly declared to be the country's
official ideology. ~ Ayn Rand
Write down this number and report to your Kommissar at the nearest railroad station.
Don't forget warm clothes and a shovel!
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San Andreas Fault in California preemptively renamed George Bush's Fault Media Matters editor blows self up over Limbaugh's 'bomber' remark End of Ramadan brings new rioting season to France Harry Reid bangs shoe on table: "We will bury you!" Dutch follow Ahmadinejad's lead, declare "there are no dykes in Holland" Ahmadinejad to Amerika: "Don't tase me, bro!" Bomb Girl and Taser Boy sell rights to their characters to Marvel Comics Cindy Sheehan hires Bomb Girl and Taser Boy as image consultants CBS stands by firing of Dan Rather: "He couldn't tell our logo from a hole in the ground" Jessie Jackson on Obama: "too White." Obama on Jackson: "I'm a smoke dat biatch if I see him"
Tasered victim at John Kerry's speech to receive Purple Heart Mugabe blames Zimbabwe's meltdown on Global Warming To stomp out possible confusion, MSM changes spelling of Obama to Ubama Craving acceptance from liberals, General Petraeus gains 300lbs and debuts report at Cannes. George Soros stops funding Democrats, converts to Islam Edwards: 41% of American children don't have lawyers John Edwards proposes "single payer" trial lawyer insurance for all, mandatory pre-jurisprudence care Illegal aliens kill people Americans won't killDemocrats select 2008 presidential slogan: "Death to America" Larry "Happy Feet" Craig uses Michael Flatley's Riverdance defense "Americans Coming Together" admit they had timing issues Presbyterian clergy issue fatwah calling for Pope's deathNew Jersey teen cracked iPhone with his face Vick awaits doggie-style welcome in prison Rock star behaves like rap star: huge media outcry China's recall of defective Daily Kos bloggers causes suicides among Democrat strategists Al Gore to recall the Internet Media declares September National Bridge Awareness Month First New Orleans, now Minnesota: Anderson Cooper travels up the Mississippi without a paddle Ray Nagin pledges to build a chocolate bridge instead William Jefferson spotted under collapsed bridge retrieving mystery package Cannibalism, rape, looting, republicanism rampant in Minneapolis Lindsay Lohan to enter astronaut training program Nigeria's plan to nationalize local spam industry sparks massive riots in Lagos
Democrat Congress's two major victories: minimum wage increase and al-Qaeda's restored operating capability London Mayor Livingston mandates Sharia law at nightclubs to prevent further bombings Taliban spokesman blames media bias as civilian deaths from US air strikes grab headlines: "Taliban has murdered thousands of civilians and we can't even get mentioned on Countdown with Olbermann. What gives?"Back alley massage parlors now offering "better ending than Sopranos" Bush to close Gitmo, detainees released into Mexican custody to be put on fast track to US citizenship
Study: Dan rather still unable to tell the difference between Paris Hilton and Katie Couric Civil war in Gaza: if it's not in Iraq why report it? US media increasingly impatient at lack of civil war in IraqUS Embassy in Syria warns of sex attacks. So how long will Bill be visiting for? Delighted Dems: "The surge has failed!"MSM spokesman: There are no civil war clashes in Gaza! Palestinians still wonder why their real civil war can't knock Iraq "civil war" off the front page As Albanians welcome Bush and show love for USA, NY Times offers them free subscriptions to "solve problem" Paris gets out of jail faster than an illegal immigrant Socialist utopia takes foothold in Venezuela as water cannons salute victory Pelosi: "I've seen climate change." John Fogerty of CCR also wants to know "if she's ever seen rain" Democrats call for troop withdrawal from Jersey Harry Reid: "Troop presence in New Jersey creating more terrorists" French riot police deployed as open minded, tolerant socialists expected to react to election results Progressives concerned with Sarkozy's "extremist agenda " of rule of law and assimilation to French culture Dems: War needs deadline; only social policies can run indefinitely Sheryl Crow to wipe out global warming one butt at a time Va Tech lessons for MSM: must ban guns, rich kids ACLU calls for calm, fears backlash against innocent gun owners: 'all gun owners aren't terrorists' Liberal groups join gun tolerance and awareness workshops Gun owners converting to Islam in droves to ward off profiling Sharp jump in number of 'non-decapitated' babies following Supreme Court decision Sharpton makes a list of 57 Don Imus sympathizers on public airwaves Al Gore and John Kerry agree: people who live in greenhouses should not expel noxious gases Al Gore hired by K-Y to pro- mote Global Warming Jelly New study shows Earth's 'fever' contagious; Mars asks planets to kick 'Greenhouse Mary' out of solar system Schumer demands Karl Rove be indicted on 1976 parking ticket Al Qaeda reacts to Schumer attack: "Thank Allah we're not Republicans!" Dems: Khalid Sheik Mohamed just watched too many episodes of 24 and made all that stuff in his confession up Fitzgerald to prosecute Ann Coulter for disclosing identity of presidential candidate John Edwards Following Scooter Libby success, media demands journalists be included on all future juries Kent State professor calls for bin Laden victory: time to bring in the National Guard again? Hollywood to America: our moral issues are better than your moral issues Obama promises to "purge himself" if he loses to Hillary to spare the public a lengthy trial House vote: Insurgents react with non-binding IED Democrat leaders don't support terrorists but they support their mission North Korea agrees to nuclear disarmament, media hails Madeleine Albright Bush: I support Democrat majority - but not their mission Is it time for Pinochet yet? Helen Thomas to be inducted into Museum of Natural History
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Al-Qaeda founder discovers DNC playbook, attacks own side in war an terror
Murtha: if we quit now, capitalism will win
New Jersey teen cracked iPhone with his face
MSM spokesman: There are no civil war clashes in Gaza!
Helen Thomas to be inducted into Museum of Natural History
