Democrats mourn the impending suicide of Donna Brazile

Democrat insiders have expressed their concern about the wellbeing of former Democratic National Committee Chair, Donna Brazile, stating that it is only a matter of time before she joins Vince Foster in taking her own life under suspicious circumstances.

Brazile's apparent suicidal ideation lead her to write "Hacks: The Inside Story of the Break-Ins and Breakdowns That Put Donald Trump in the White House," which is expected to hit the bookshelves tomorrow. The book is rumored to contain some unflattering revelations about Hillary Clinton that should never have been told and which will never be reported in the media after Brazile supposedly commits an involuntary suicide.

Mental health care professionals note that Brazile's irrational conduct in writing the book is typical of a condition known as "Suicide by Hillary." The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) defines "Suicide by Hillary" as 1) Knowing too much, and 2) Not keeping your damn mouth shut about what you know.

Friends of the Clintons say that Hillary Clinton is saddened and upset that Brazile was not timely diagnosed before she decided to write a tell-all book. The former Presidential candidate cut short her own book tour to attend the upcoming funeral and sent out the following tweet:



 

I believe the preferred nomenclature here is "nonconsensual suicide."

It isn't as bad as nonconsensual sex among the progs (unless done by the Clintons), but it's still bad (once again, unless it's done by the Clintons).



 

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Has Donna Brazile become a right-wing nut job?

If not, I suggest she avoid grassy knolls




And she might not want to answer her door if this man knocks




 

Ah, that (historic) paraphrase of the fatal mishap which "has been happened" to Tomáš Masaryk:

... a suicide was committed on him, by his being jumped out of a window ...



 

Antonio Salazarinski

... I suggest she avoid grassy knolls

 

Most Equal Comrade Putout,

You never disappoint.

Red Salmon
 

"Someone shot Seth, just like that!"
 

 

A great evil has awakened, there is a great disturbance in the force...
 

The kind and delicious Red Salmon

Most Equal Comrade Putout,

You never disappoint.

Red Salmon
.

 

 

.



(as above)
 

Will no one rid Hillary of this meddlesome author?




 

Comrade Chairman, that is a most excellent Juxtaposition of historic events (even before they take place)!
 

CNN is now reporting that "Donna Brazile" is a fictitious character and has never existed. The publisher of the "book" said to have been authored by this non-person has an IP address linked to Russian oligarchs, Putin and Jared Kushner. Analysis of the grammar and writing style of "Hacks" by expert analysts shows a remarkably similar style to another book, "The Art of the Deal".
 

Genosse Dummkopf

Ah, that (historic) paraphrase of the fatal mishap which "has been happened" to Tomáš Masaryk:

... a suicide was committed on him, by his being jumped out of a window ...

(aka the Third Defenestration of Prague)

: Masarky was truly a very tidy man. He even closed the window after he jumped out of it!
 

Our soon-to-be late comrade had many laudable progressive features, including approved race and gender. If only she had been transgendering, she might have survived the fury of self-denunciation which will claim her life and mollify the indignation of the proletariat!