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A Helpful Obama Glossary

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All truth is relative! It's the post-modern way!

http://www.northstarnational.com/2009/0 ... -glossary/

Bob Maistros wrote: Many Americans are no doubt confused by some of the terminology used by the president in recent weeks as he has given speeches before a joint session of Congress and the United Nations, conducted a variety of television interviews and introduced new policy proposals. As a public service, we are providing a glossary of these terms with their real meanings:

Some samples from this excellent exposition:

Choice – the opportunity to select big government.

Competition – we choose who wins.

Compromise – accepting my position after I give a big speech.

Fact (as in, “these are the facts” or “to state a fact”) – my opinion.

Honest debate – agreeing with me.

Incorporate (as in “incorporate ideas from Republicans”) – include in the early stages of a proposal and then have Pelosi and Reid drop like a hot potato behind closed doors in the final version.

Irresponsible (as in “irresponsible behavior”) – constitutionally protected.

Misinformation – facts, when presented by our opponents.

Neutrality (as in “net neutrality”) – favoring one side in a dispute, especially when that side has supported your campaign and provided a senior White House staff member.

Nobody (as in “nobody disputes [these facts]”) – no liberals or members of the mainstream media.

Non-profit (as in proposals to establish tax-favored, non-profit status for failing newspapers) – making official a condition that has existed unofficially for years.

Nothing (as in “nothing in this plan will require you or your employer to change the coverage or the doctor you have”) – everything.

Plan (as in, “the [health-care] plan I am announcing tonight”) – a really good speech.

Security (as in “stability and security” in health care or “true security for all Israelis”) – you're toast.

Tax – certainly not the fine that goes along with the individual mandate. No matter what that little #&%@! Stephanopoulos or Webster's say.

Some additional words and phrases that need explaining:

Bipartisan support - everyone doing what I want

Change - screw up totally

Crisis - enablement for something I wish to implement without opposition

Distraction - embarrassing major news story

False Choices - any options other than the one I want

Fairness - distribution of spoils to my supporters

I don't think... (as in "I don't think my opponents are racist")
- My surrogates take the criticism for saying something I believe while I look conciliatory by appearing to deny it

Let me be clear - incoherent obfuscation coming up

Must Be (as in if the governments of Iran and North Korea choose to ignore international standards . . . then they must be held accountable.)
- won't be

Multilateralism - I'm too weak to make any kind of decision so I'm waiting for someone else to take the lead

Old way of doing... (as in Wall Street understands it must shed "the old way of doing business")
- Something that does not benefit me

Racist - anyone who does not agree with me

Smart diplomacy - dumb sh*t that anyone with half a brain would see as lunacy

Special Interests - any group not on my side; contrast with Pubilc Good which are the unions, ACORN and anybody else I feel like rewarding

Won't (as in "I said I won't sign a bill that adds to the deficit or the national debt.")
- absolutely positively will

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Chairman Obama balances truth, the way I balance time.

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Brain - Something that will be removed and placed in a jar when you become a party member. Trust me on this one.

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Penis- Something removed by the Cuban Health Care System in order to make men more acceptable to Wymyn and Comrade Moore.

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Colonel 7.62 wrote:Penis- Something removed by the Cuban Health Care System in order to make men more acceptable to Wymyn and Comrade Moore.

I resemble that remark Colonel !!!

Actually removal of the penis is an equalitarian concept.

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Status Quo - The way I felt before getting drunk off my ass playing the Obama drinking game: Take a shot every time Dear Leader's says one of the above phrases during a campaignspeech.

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Colonel 7.62 wrote:Penis- Something removed by the Cuban Health Care System in order to make men more acceptable to Wymyn and Comrade Moore.
I'm a little more AFK then normal lately, but I thought "Penis" was what they replaced the Brain which was removed from your head after the surgery. This might not help I was on the crapper that day when my number was called up at the local Obamaospital.

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HELP. What's the definition of Stimulus?

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AbecedariusRex wrote:HELP. What's the definition of Stimulus?

Stimulus: We're just going to throw money at the problem.

Uh: I'm running out of buzzwords.

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A Certain News Network: Fox News; a news network on which you can bet your Change(TM) I won't be appearing.

Attacking This Administration
: Daring to criticize this administration. See A Certain News Network.

Dialogue or Discussion: Dictation. Depending on context, it can be either TO my enemies or FROM my cronies, foreign and domestic. Similar to Honest Debate.

Serious: ex. "if you want to have a SERIOUS discussion about health care..." Unsubstantial or requiring a great deal of compromise on your part, not mine. And it must be face-to-face with me, by appointment. None of this protesting/picketing crap. See Distraction.

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Lively Debate: I bite off your finger.

Details:...

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СИГНАЛ ТРЕВОГА НОВОСТЕЙ! Был объявлены, что Царем BHO будет русский национальным языком от сегодня.

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Comrades, you are being grossly unfair to President Zero. Most people are many things. Connoisseurs, artists, readers, workers, and so forth. But Lord Obama has shown us that there is nothing whatsoever to him but his talk. Just today Rahm Emanuel, his chief of staff, said that Lord Nothing would not send more troops into Afghanistan until he could be sure that the government there was representative.

I am gobsmacked with his perspicacity. If only prior presidents had known that we could have been spared the trouble of sending troops into Irag, Afghanistan before, Germany, Japan, the Philippines, and other places which didn't have good government.

After all, why would we actually send troops somewhere <i>where they might be needed</i>?

How wonderful that President Zilch could clarify that for me.

And because I love him so I must state that since there is utterly nothing to him but his talk then we must not examine his talk. Because if we do we find that there is, uh, nothing to him, including his talk.


 
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