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Obama's Algae-Powered Car: Chevy Fishtank

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Speaking at the University of Miami today, President Obama boldly challenged skyrocketing oil prices by suggesting that we should start using algae instead of gas.

"Three years ago I came out with a bold proposal to inflate American tires, and that alone has diminished our dependency on foreign oil by 83 percent. The remaining 17 percent can be easily made up for with algae - if we can only figure out how to make energy out of that.

"Why algae? Because we've got a lot of it. In fact, as a nation, we're loaded with pretty much everything - take dirt, for example. We have a lot - A LOT of dirt. Except 'dirt' doesn't have the same foreign, cosmopolitan ring to it as the word 'algae' has.

"So I'm hereby announcing production of a new algae-powered automobile: the Chevy Fishtank."

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Ushanka tip to Robert Fine for the discovery of algae in the Chevy Fishtank.

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Wonderful! Of course, opening the door will cause you to lose your algae source. But then, not having anyplace to charge your Volt didn't stop it...oh wait....

And remember Red One, Dear Leader does not 'announce production of' a new anything, he dictates it to be so!!

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This whole project smells " fishy ".

Shouldn't we report it to " [email protected] " ?

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This reminds me... Before there was IOwnTheWorld.com, the guys posted their art on the Cube as THE KG3 - https://thepeoplescube.com/kg3/

And here's what Big Fur Hat did back in 2008 - only this one isn't Chevy but the 1967 Oldsmobile Delmont 88 Fishtank -

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TEDDY: The Man, The Myth, The Backstroke

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Maybe if Obama proposed a car that ran on bull s**t GM could start work building the Chevy Biden.

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Back in '72, National Lampoon had some fun with Ted Kennedy's Chappaquiddick fishing expedition.

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The text read:
It floats.
The way our body is built, we'd be surprised if it didn't. The sheet of flat steel that goes underneath every Volkswagen keeps out water, as well as dirt and salt and other nasty things that can eat away at the underside of a car. So it's watertight at the bottom. And everybody knows it's easier to shut the door on a Volkswagen after you've rolled down the window a little.
That proves it's practically airtight on top. If it was a boat, we could call it the Water Bug. But it's not a boat, it's a car.
And, like Mary Jo Kopechne, it's only 99 and 44/100 percent pure. So it won't stay afloat forever. Just long enough. Poor Teddy. If he'd been smart enough to buy a Volkswagen, he never would have gotten into hot water.

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When you buy a Chevy Fishtank, the dealer uses a net to capture your family and dumps you in a plastic bag half full of water.
Then, they tie a knot at the top and places your family in the car until you acclimatize.

If any of your family members float belly up, they flush 'em down the toilet free of charge and offer a replacement.

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Those Kennedy graphics were some of my forever favorites.

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Great Stalin's Ghost wrote:Maybe if Obama proposed a car that ran on bull s**t GM could start work building the Chevy Biden.

If Washington D.C. could fund a car that runs on BS, this country would discover that it has an inexhaustible fuel supply.

Come to think of it, this administration has much in common with algae.It's green, opaque, thrives on waste and clogs up everything it gets into.



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I'm so confused, I thought Al G. was Al Gore's Hip Hop moniker. Or maybe it all makes perfect sense.



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Algae even has its own TV channel now -

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OCCUPY POND!
Power to the pond scum!
ALGAE BEFORE FISH!
Fish are 1%, scum is 99%

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Fish beware! Your days are numbered!

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I remember when there were lots of lakes with algae. They were called dead lakes. They were all over the country. But they're all cleaned up now. Nice clean lakes. Just when I thought environmentalism meant cleaning up the environment they throw this at us. Now environmentalism means killing the lakes again so we can have clean energy.

No swimming in Lake Lysenko, kids. Beach is closed till Next Tuesday.

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Red Square wrote:This reminds me... Before there was IOwnTheWorld.com, the guys posted their art on the Cube as THE KG3 - https://thepeoplescube.com/kg3/

And here's what Big Fur Hat did back in 2008 - only this one isn't Chevy but the 1967 Oldsmobile Delmont 88 Fishtank -


Don't forget the ever popular Barack Impala, comrade.
Barack Impala.jpg


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Algae2.jpg
Approved By Exoskeleton Unions Across America!

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We have confirmed an in field sighting of Maxine Waters' image on pond scum. We are considering this a sign that we are on the right track with algae energy.

stale waters.JPG

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ThePeoplesComrade wrote:We have confirmed an in field sighting of Representative Stagnent MaxineWaters' image on pond scum. We are considering this a sign that we are on the right track with algae energy.


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Red Square wrote:Algae even has its own TV channel now -

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I do hate seeing a bunch of boring well done's and back slapping but some contributions so sufficiently delight our soul as to require praise, graphic poetry.

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Oh come on TPC ..... did Red Square put you up to this ? Worse than the Oscars.

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Krasnodar wrote:Oh come on TPC ..... did Red Square put you up to this ? Worse than the Oscars.
Hey, is this economy we take what we can get.


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Krasnodar wrote:Agreed. Obamanomics 101.
OK then, I'll also take what you can get.

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All I want is what's mine. And maybe some of yours.

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Comrade Betinov! You might have a great future working for the Ways and Means Committee, who implement the iron will of the people through the IRS: "We've got what it takes to take what you've got."

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Red Square, you are on a roll these days! ...is it true a rolling cube gathers no moss? heh.



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Comrades! Commodore Snoogie Woogums reports:

Mick Jagger Gives President Lyrics to Promote Algae for Fuel

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Algae
(Formally known as "Angie")

Algae, Algae, you're not the scum that you appear
Algae, Algae, soon you'll be able to drive me from here

Your not just scum in the moat
Soon you'll power my car and the boat
All we have to do is refine
But Algae, Algae
some still think your just still slime
Algae, you're beautiful, don't give those folks the time
Algae, and remember everything is on the taxpayers dime

Used to think you scummed up the fish tank
But now you're money in the bank
Let me sing it from here
Algae, Algae
soon our energy troubles will disappear

Oh, Algae from the pond, the frogs will miss you when your gone
They'll have sadness in their eyes
But Algae, Algae
ain't it time to say goodbye

Your not just scum in the moat
Soon you'll power my car and the boat
All we have to do is refine
And Algae, Algae
everything is on the tax payer dime


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Comrades, I cannot believe that you, of all people, here in the Lenin-anointed Inner Circle, have not seen the real reason for algae:

Algae can vote in Chicago. We vote 'em, then we make them into fuel. They cannot testify against us, or do anything inconvenient like repent.

One alga, one vote, one mile. Get it?

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and if they can vote, they sure can be on the welfare rolls, and thus the millionaires and billionaires and corporate jet owners can be taxed to support them.

(proceeds to be held in, umm, call it escrow, like the social security lockbox--until the algae or their decendants can properly claim it using the proper forms, or e-filed on some system to be developed by Aunt Zaytuni through funding from the Stimulus package.)

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Oh Lenin, yes, Tovarichi. Oh yes. And think how short the generations of algae are. Why, we could fill up a voter list faster than a Chicago machine politician can nullify an election.

And algae don't really need that money, do they? I need it more, I think, with all my charitable works. And you, Tovarichi, do many proggerriffic things, I think. You need more money too.

Let us get together and treat on this money thing. In the spirit of course of free and open exchange and mutual exaltation.

Bring your credit cards.


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Tried using Photoshop and liquify. I think I made Michelle look better than normal, not my intent. She does have her moments.

I am very proud of my Bill Maher moment of name calling with little or no context. Placing "slime" and "algae" together saves the day with it's allusion to Obama's new algae dream and the belief of many that the Obama team is appropriately slimy. I suppose if I had put "SLUT" on the cover we would have had the HBO fans rolling in the isles.

This is in contrast to Rush Limbaugh using "slut" in the context of some unmarried female bemoaning her annual birth control burden and wanting tax payers to foot the bill for her contraception. Here the context and the exaggeration creates a humorous point.

Calling Michelle Obama, Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachmann a slut or prostitute has no contextual, satirical meaning whatsoever, except to sixth graders, the Pee-Wee hockey team and Bill Maher.

People that compare Maher to Limbaugh by saying they did the same inappropriate name calling are wrong. Limbaugh had context and developed it at length. Maher is simply an adolescent name caller. Bill Maher is a queer - now let's all laugh hysterically.




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Of course Rush should be pushed off the air for calling a punch a punch. And of course Ed Schultz should never have had to apologize for calling Laura Ingraham "a talk-show slut." Because Ingraham is a conservative, she is a slut, and because Rush is a conservative, he's guilty of anything, up to and including the fact that we cannot divide by zero.

(Don't tell the sheeple that we can't multiply by zero either; they don't know that since we have deliberately made so many people total zeros, that multiplying the intelligence of people is always bound to give a zero.)

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Father Prog Theocritus wrote:Of course Rush should be pushed off the air for calling a punch a punch. And of course Ed Schultz should never have had to apologize for calling Laura Ingraham "a talk-show slut." Because Ingraham is a conservative, she is a slut, and because Rush is a conservative, he's guilty of anything, up to and including the fact that we cannot divide by zero.

(Don't tell the sheeple that we can't multiply by zero either; they don't know that since we have deliberately made so many people total zeros, that multiplying the intelligence of people is always bound to give a zero.)
Comrade, one too many trips to the Jiffy-Lobo? Or how does this fit into the Algae thread? Do we need to change the combination on the beet vodka stash?

Commissar of Thread Purity

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Dear Comrade The People's Comrade,

Didn't you get the memo ?

Theocritus is simply utilizing the technique of creating a diversion which gets attention away from a subject of current scrutiny. Like introducing Sandra Fluke to Congress.

For a short while, nobody was talking about Obama and the economy... Is this not so ?

So get used to unrelated subjects being introduced to side-track discussions of administration-related failures. ( of course we know there aren't any...)

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Comrade Theocritus is such a political ANIMAL. I know what Bruno sees in him.

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Comrades, I apologize for my absence. I was in a retreat in the Amazon with Commissarka Olga, a Gypsy who can channel the shade of V. I. Lenin. I had hoped to partake of his sterling wisdom.

(Oh hell, I had flown my pilfered Gulfstream 5 to Bimini and was pounding down Brut out of Waterford flutes. The Brut that is that I didn't break over the heads of people who didn't jump fast enough for me.)

Yes, I am a political animal. I am a leftist, you know. The B-52s on a CD told us what companies we could buy from, and I always heed that. If I can do it noisily. This also requires that I actually buy something using legal tender, instead of using the progressive's legal tender, which is a gun held by the police, paid for by the people, and aimed at the heads of the people.

Everything I do is politicized. Don't tell me that Rush Limbaugh can breath air; I'll have to find a way not to.

But come to think of it, I do not breathe air. I only breathe progressive farts.

Just like Diane Sawyer, Chris Matthews, Janeane Gawdawfulho, Rachel Madcow, and my hero, the murderous thug Ed Schultz.

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Algae Obama: the fuel of the future in the Glorious World of Next Tuesday™
Grow Your Own Alternative Fuel in the comfort of your living room!

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Red, what a wonderful idea. What if there were an Algae Sharpton with his red wig? There is red algae, isn't there? Something which screws up the beaches which we can blame on the Kapitoli$t$. Just think of the color contrast. The green for Gaia, and the red for, well us.


 
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