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E-mail itBush Still Causing Job Losses and Hardship
 | Dozens of local area workers were left jobless yesterday as the doors closed on their workplace after more than nine years of frisky business. Devastated staff at the "I Hate Bush T-Shirt and Vendor Wear" factory wept as the moment they were dreading finally became a reality: the firm went into bankruptcy in result of sagging orders for their goods and slim prospects for a renewed demand in the future. "The management can say whatever they want, but I personally blame Bush," said Fred Fluger, a longtime employee, as he carried home a storage box filled with "I Hate Bush" shirts, sweaters, boxers, beach towels, and pajamas, with which the cash-stripped company had been paying its workers for the last three months. |
"Bush doesn't want us to continue to prosper like we did during his presidency, when everybody had jobs and could afford to spend money on 'I Hate Bush' T-shirts, and we couldn't keep up with demand, and times then were good, so good!" Mr. Fluger then began to sob and mutter incoherently to himself, as he realized how good he really had it when George Bush was in office. But there also were dissenters. "Not to let Bush off the hook, but I also blame capitalist markets," said Keith Matthews, a marketing expert and multiple winner of the factory's prestigious "Malcontent of the Month" award. "Why must our lives depend on demand for our products? In a normal, centrally-planned, government-subsidized economy, we would be making 'I Hate Bush' shirts for many years until we retire, and then our children would continue our work, without any changes in design or technology, with guaranteed employment for generations to come. That's why I'm so disappointed in Obama. If he keeps letting us down, in the next election I'll vote for Nader." The factory did try to fight back. But the idea to re-tool the T-shirt line with pro-Obama slogans was dashed by the recent elections in Virginia and New Jersey, which the management said was the final writing on the wall. There have also been rumors of a large grant from the NEA Foundation, to keep the factory alive as a taxpayer-funded artistic community. However, the dreams of working families were brutally crushed by the right-wing media's attacks on the Foundation's progressive effort, which linked NEA grants to endorsing Obama's policies. Their baseless claims that the NEA was somehow using taxpayer dollars for leftist propaganda forced Foundation's leaders to withdraw the "I Hate Bush" subsidy. The 51 employees, some of whom have been with the firm from the very beginning, said an emotional private farewell to each other in the Organic Foods Lunchroom at the factory. "Who wouldn't like to get an organic, fair-trade 'I Hate Bush' T-shirt as a holiday gift from their loved ones? It was so selfish to close now. We all know that Christmas is a corporate ploy to boost profits in the last quarter of the fiscal year when the bourgeois like to go shopping for stuff. Buck Fush!" "My daughter is so smart because she went to college," the father beams proudly, but his smile quickly gives way to the usual concerned look: "That's why the greedy corporate bastards refuse to hire her. Thankfully, she collects disability for her dyslexia." Mr. Laing agrees about Christmas, adding that "if only the factory lasted until the right-wingers regained the majority in Congress in 2010, we could replace 'I Hate Bush' with the name of some other Republican hatemonger designated for this role by the progressive community. The right-wingers would cut taxes and then the people would have more money to fight them by wearing anti-right-wing shirts. The sales would pick up and we could keep our jobs." But even in these difficult times there still may be help. An investors group associated with Fox News is said to be interested in purchasing the factory building and using laid-off workers to support recently added news staff - an expansion caused by the network's ever increasing ratings. The only other opportunity for the laid-off workers seems to be at a nearby tea factory, where demand for the product has taken an unexpected upturn since the election of Obama as President. "I think the tea business and all the parties associated with it are going to be a real booming concern the next couple of years," Mr. Fluger said. |
"It's clearly Bush's fault because he disappeared from the news and stopped making dumb statements, leaving it to Obama to bring him up all the time" fumed Fred Fluger. "Why can't he poke his nose around in world affairs? Hell, even Carter can be counted on to make a post-presidential idiotic statement. What's up with this 'dignified retirement'? I'm sure Bush is doing this with some evil purpose, just like when he blew up the Twin Towers to become a fascist dictator for life, or destroyed New Orleans to test his weather machine. I think Bush hates us and our values. I really do. His silence is a ploy to hurt us and to diminish demand for our selfless work."
Emotions ran high at the "I Hate Bush" factory which for nine years provided employment, healthcare, union benefits, and subsidized mortgages for its diverse staff, most of whom were now blaming Bush for the closure and bankruptcy.
Andrew Laing's daughter Audrey, 35, was also there, supporting her father. "I had hoped the factory would last until after Christmas," said Audrey Laing, who had no job at the company but depended upon her father's income for sustenance.
___________________________
Additional reporting by Red Square
Comrade TheSystemIsBroken you dare question a member of the inner party? And then you proceed to lecture an inner party member on economics? Grab your shovel and get your butt to the nearest train station and report to the local Commissar in your region for beet field duty. Receive a proper re-education at the Karl Marx treatment center and then you will be able to post Party approved korrekt opinions for liberals and progs and not the tripe you just posted.
To infer that I would ever blame Obama FOR ANYTHING is a most serious accusation and since you are brand new here I will overlook your obvious ignorance as to the purpose of the Peoples Cube this time and this time only. If you continue to post thoughtcrimes such as our economics are part of a natural boom bust cycle and is not the result of capitalistic pigs exploiting the working class masses instead to enhance their greedy profits you will be purged and sent to the Gulag.
You have been warned, now get shoveling and full fill your beet quota in accordance with the five year plan Comrade.
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama."Considering the high level of intelligence around here"
Comrade, you question the collectivist mindset here?
30 yrs. hmmm ...
That means we must now blame Reagan! Let's spin one for the Gipper.
I do wish, though, that more Americans would get over their Obama obsessions and actually think about the future of our economic system.
Infidel Castrate
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama."Considering the high level of intelligence around here"
Comrade, you question the collectivist mindset here?
30 yrs. hmmm ...
That means we must now blame Reagan! Let's spin one for the Gipper.
No President can be assigned blame for the current moment. We can say that the Reagan Presidency began a trend in fiscal and financial governance that began us down a path, but those policies were perpetuated by Bush, Clinton and Bush the sequel regardless of which party controlled congress or the white house. Alan Greenspan said it himself, a fundamental philosophy was proved faulty. The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.
TheSystemIsBroken
Infidel Castrate
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama."Considering the high level of intelligence around here"
Comrade, you question the collectivist mindset here?
30 yrs. hmmm ...
That means we must now blame Reagan! Let's spin one for the Gipper.
No President can be assigned blame for the current moment. We can say that the Reagan Presidency began a trend in fiscal and financial governance that began us down a path, but those policies were perpetuated by Bush, Clinton and Bush the sequel regardless of which party controlled congress or the white house. Alan Greenspan said it himself, a fundamental philosophy was proved faulty. The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.
Hmmm Comrade,
Your ideology seems unusual. Please enlighten us some more.
Yes I suppose Reagan started us down that path .. after all, he created the Fed that was responsible for the "boom and bust cycles" didn't he? Or was it the great progressive Woodrow Wilson?
Or how about the progressive income tax ... the Sixteenth Amendment to the constitution. Without such a glorious redistribution of wealth our collective government could have never got so large allowing our "political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable".
And yes, that "totally unregulated market" ... "Laissez-faire" Capitalism, enlighten us please with your historical perspective on that!
TheSystemIsBroken
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.I get it. Instead of abolishing private property outright and having everything controlled by the State in the name of the Working Classes what we do is abolish private property by simply making everything subject to regulation and then we can reform all the institutions of society so as to insure social justice for all by voting on how everything in the country works! It's a real revolution!
Democracy Now!!!
I don't care what old dead white guys said about unlimited Democracy being nothing but institutionalized civil war that inevitably destroys society.
Margaret
TheSystemIsBroken
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.I get it. Instead of abolishing private property outright and having everything controlled by the State in the name of the Working Classes what we do is abolish private property by simply making everything subject to regulation and then we can reform all the institutions of society so as to insure social justice for all by voting on how everything in the country works! It's a real revolution!
Democracy Now!!!
I don't care what old dead white guys said about unlimited Democracy being nothing but institutionalized civil war that inevitably destroys society.
A backdoor approach to enslavement, truly progressive! Margaret I love you, will you marry me? Oops sorry I am already married ... but if I wasn't, umm umm umm.
TheSystemIsBroken
I do wish, though, that more Americans would get over their Obama obsessions and actually think about the future of our economic system.I'm not obsessed with Obama! No, I'm obsessed with Obama's money stash! Gimme them dollars, Obama! I got bills to pay!
TheSystemIsBroken
No President can be assigned blame for the current moment. We can say that the Reagan Presidency began a trend in fiscal and financial governance that began us down a path, but those policies were perpetuated by Bush, Clinton and Bush the sequel regardless of which party controlled congress or the white house. Alan Greenspan said it himself, a fundamental philosophy was proved faulty. The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.I'm not here to assign blame, comrade. I'm here to find out who I have to talk to or what form I have to fill out in order to get my fair share of the pie. This economic downturn has rendered me useless in terms of providing and thinking for myself and therefore I need government assistance and dare I say government direction. Can someone please help me? Who is the White House Czar of the Obama Cash Stash?
Chairman M. S. Punchenko
TheSystemIsBroken
I do wish, though, that more Americans would get over their Obama obsessions and actually think about the future of our economic system.I'm not obsessed with Obama! No, I'm obsessed with Obama's money stash! Gimme them dollars, Obama! I got bills to pay!
TheSystemIsBroken
No President can be assigned blame for the current moment. We can say that the Reagan Presidency began a trend in fiscal and financial governance that began us down a path, but those policies were perpetuated by Bush, Clinton and Bush the sequel regardless of which party controlled congress or the white house. Alan Greenspan said it himself, a fundamental philosophy was proved faulty. The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.I'm not here to assign blame, comrade. I'm here to find out who I have to talk to or what form I have to fill out in order to get my fair share of the pie. This economic downturn has rendered me useless in terms of providing and thinking for myself and therefore I need government assistance and dare I say government direction. Can someone please help me? Who is the White House Czar of the Obama Cash Stash?
The line forms here.
Can you help me, System??? We need an economic system that works for me -- literally.
Chairman M. S. Punchenko
Lord knows I got a bad finger and I'm going to need someone -- anyone!! -- with a wet finger able enough to go through that litany of red-tape I would have to fill out.Can you help me, System??? We need an economic system that works for me -- literally.
Spoken like a true Progressive Chairman. I assume you followed correct protocol and injured that finger pointing blame at someone else? Hope and change is not what you should see in the mirror everyday, hope and change can only come from what others or government can give to us! We lack the wisdom to improve ourselves, we must be managed.
All of our misery is because someone else denied it to us, we must have Social Justice, and NOW!
Praise be to his O'liness.
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama.
Let's get real here... this is a satirical website. If you came here for serious commentary, you made a wrong turn someplace.
Bearing that in mind, it's unlikely that any or most of us expect people to credibly accept that the current economic difficulty is entirely the result of an 11 month presidency. But it is strange that the current administration, which is not supposed to be a satire as far as I can tell, expects people to credibly accept that the entire economic downtown is the fault of the prior eight year presidency.
There have been economic cycles throughout history and there probably always will be. Great Britain has been in a long term decline since the early 20th century, largely due to the type of economic policies that Mr. Obama wishes to implement for us now. The system may be broken, but probably most of us here would agree Obama's ideas will likely make things worse. He is not responsible for the entire hole, but I certainly wish he'd stop digging.
Quote:
The system may be broken, but probably most of us here would agree Obama's ideas will likely make things worse. He is not responsible for the entire hole, but I certainly wish he'd stop digging.Actually, I think it is more than likely that BO's ideas will make it much worse.
I usually don't hit TV's with my shovel, but in this case, I must make an exception.
WHACK!!!
Don't go scaring our new comrade away by telling him he's made a wrong turn, when nothing could be further from the truth. Of course he knows this is a satirical site, and rest assured he's come to the right place! Is that not obvious from his extremely amusing comments? I swear no one has made me laugh so hard in quite a long while.
That's more than can be said about the rest of you.
Now, as for you, Opiate: Straighten out your antennae and pull that broken vacuum tube out of your mouth. At least I assume--and you should hope--that's your mouth it's sticking out of. And be warned if you say anything that dumb again, you'll be keeping company with some broken down, vermin-infested sofa at the side of the road.
Where do you think we found Chairman Meow after all this time?
Comrade Castrate
Spoken like a true Progressive Chairman. I assume you followed correct protocol and injured that finger pointing blame at someone else?Protocol? Huh? Oh, you mean bowing to foreign leaders? That is what protocol means, does it not??? Huh, I'm looking at my daily White House Talking-Points and it says protocol means groveling before world leaders if you happen to be the POTUS. Hmm... I'm not the POTUS so no, I did not follow correct protocol.
Comrade Opiate
Bearing that in mind, it's unlikely that any or most of us expect people to credibly accept that the current economic difficulty is entirely the result of an 11 month presidency.Um, the recession is over, comrade. Did ya get that memo?? President Obama in all his infinite unicorn shitting glory has solved this economic crisis. The Great Thatcher-Reagan-Bush-Clinton-Bush Induced Recession of 2009 is finally over. Hell, Time magazine is running stories on how happy the commoners are now that they have to do with less:
Emphasis mine...
State Media Organ Time Magazine
Happiness is a sappy word and a flimsy concept — more fleeting than contentment, several octaves lower than joy. But happiness is what pollsters test and economists track, however clumsily, so we're stuck with it as the medium for measuring our mood. Not surprisingly, that mood has bounced around over the years, with the general sense of well-being hitting its lowest points in 1973, 1982, 1992 and 2001, all recession years. So why is it that at least some aspects of the Great Recession of 2009 appear to have made people feel better?Snip...
When the markets tanked last fall, happiness did too, and anyone who has lost his or her job, house or health care is probably still in a world of pain. But here's the funny thing: by this past summer, overall well-being was higher than it was in the summer of 2008, before the Apocalypse. In fact, the latest report finds America's cheeriness at an all-time high.
Read more: >>>
Read more: >>>
See! Everyone is happy, System! People are happy -- happy just to be happy! Happy that we live in a post-racial, post-partisan, post-post society! Failure and success are interchangeable with glorious Barack H. Obama at the wheel! Oh, and the H in Barack H. Obama stands for HAPPINESS! Tee-hee! I'm so cheerie that I have to do with less! Who cares if things improve or not? Economy? Screw the economy! We were better off before such a thing existed!
On top of that, who wins? BIG HONKING GIANT BUSINESS. That's who. Who are some of the biggest liberal supporters out there? BIG HONKING GIANT UNION INFESTED BUSINESS. Are we seeing a connection here? Big business and big government go hand in hand.
Oh, and Comrades. We don't know anybody from the former Soviet Union around here do we? Nope. Not at all....
I am so happy now that President Zero has assumed leadership, and I'm happier than any of the little happy proles that State Organ Time Magazine is writing about. (I just hope that the people that they're writing about had a pass from Pinkie to quit digging beets while they were being interviewed.) Every day I get up, and my feet don't even touch the floor. Before the elevation of Barack Hubris Obama to President and Chief Mirror Gazer and Sniveler-in-Chief it was tough for me to get out of bed, but these days my feet don't even touch the ground. I know that instead of 300 horsepower in my car, I have 300 unicorns.
And I'll tell you something else. Because as a Made Progressive I have sublimated all my all to the Common Good(tm), I have replaced all my DVDs of licentious content with DVDs of Barack Hoity-toity Obama making speeches.
It's my fondest hope to have an iPod with Dear Leader's speeches on it, just like the one that he gave to Lilibet over in England. I'm sure that she's worn it out and has it taken to the Tower of London at night to be placed among the Crown Jewels. After all, what's Queen Victoria's bow crown compared to the wit and wisdom of the Senator of 150 days?
TheSystemIsBroken, there is no question that the awful Reagan (spit, spit) started something. Not in 1980 in his election but when the tax cuts went into effect. Reagan (spit, spit) had the temerity to double the wealth of America.
Now I'm with Meow, except when he's stealing my Lalique. I see nothing wrong with my wealth doubling, or tripling, or more. But as far as the unwashed proles? Hell no! If the proles have money they can do what they want to do! They might not work in the beet fields like they're supposed to do. What we need to do is (1) take as much of their money as possible; (2) preach to them that they're evil; (3) tell them that we're going to give them something back, although it's not much--this is the Reach-Around Ecomonics bit; (4) and then tell the world that America is evil and grovel before a bunch of fascists Arabs and European socialists.
Now that's Change and Hope that I can get behind.
As part of my reach-around package.
Commissar Theocritus
TheSystemIsBroken, there is no question that the awful Reagan (spit, spit) started something. Not in 1980 in his election but when the tax cuts went into effect. Reagan (spit, spit) had the temerity to double the wealth of America.
Commissar Theocritus,
Spoken very well comrade, that damn Raygun ... look at what he did to us. He totally screwed up the unemployment, interest rates, and inflation/stagflation that our glorius former leader Jimmy Carter left us.
And what a fool was he to think he could dismantle that so called "Evil Empire" by a comprehensive energy policy causing the lowering the price of crude oil, the "Evil Empire's" economic life blood. Damn him for removing our collectives "windfall profit tax" causing lower gas prices. And what nerve, thinking that creating a imaginary Star Wars weapons program that could lead that so called "Evil Empire" into an arms race that the "Evil Empire" could not keep up with due to inefficiency in their economic system.
And what damn idiots we were for giving him 2 landslide elections. Clearly only the those few blue states really knew the truth. What were all those red states thinking???
1980
1984
Now see what you did Commissar Theocritus, I'm missing half of his his O'liness apology speech to China now on TV, otherwise I would stay and comment more.
I cannot tell you how ashamed I am to be from Texas, which always, and here I'm wiping a tear from my eye, votes for the Rethuglicans for President. I climb on the roof of the Rancho de Rio Grande and call out, using my PA system, "Citizens! You are oppressed! You are nothing! You need me to lead you to the Progressive World of Next Tuesday(tm)!"
And the people look at me and say, "Fuck off, you stupid wanker. We have lives. What do you think we are? Democrats? We'll live our own lives. If you want to tell people what to do, get a poodle. Fuck off."
Then, blinded by tears, I find my way down from my roof and crawl into bed, and run my fingers through OPM and moan, "Oh, why don't these people need me? If they don't need me, how can I steal from them?" And finally I fall asleep, sucking my thumb, dreaming that Rahm Emanuel will avenge me.
Have you bent your tinfoil hats!!! Not one report of this new prole, SystemIsChoking, on the unicorn skywriting bulletin board, who does a rooster have to peck around here to get some people's notification? Huh, comrades, HUH!!!! I didn't see one unicorn fart over my palacial residence to mark the entrance of the one and holy SystemIsChoking.
Speaking of farts, remember comrades... Keep the F-words to minimum UNLESS your saying...
Now, comrade SystemIs????????, er Broken. Please enlighten us, oh master of the ages... you are so wise...
SystemIB's Current Truth
...it's appropriate that your Commie characters closely resemble stock characters from 1950s Cold War films, of course watching those films is the closest any of us come to actually dealing with or interacting with communists.Interesting comrade, are you saying that the dozen or more professed Marxist professors I was indoctrinated by in the USSA were not communists? Well, comrade, I think you should take that up with them, as they told me otherwise! HAIL OBAMA!!!
It is this harking to the 1950's that I hear across progdom, on many websites.... Hmmm... must be that the the call of The Wild.... neh! The call of The Current Truth is the subversion of claims of socialism or communism with character attack's that compare the subject to some Backwards 1950's Red Witch Hunter(TM).
WHY DID I NOT GET THE MEMO!?! AGAIN!!
O.k comrades, this is inexcusable and exasperating; here we have an insignificant prole spreading Current Truth(TM) and I, a Commissar of good standing, am not informed!?!
How will we ever reach the Progresssive World of Next Tuesday(TM) if the Current Truth(TM) is not properly dispersed!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Now, comrade prole SystemIs?????, er Broken, get on your damn train and shut the hell up, your Local Kommissar is waiting to wipe off your gastreous your mouth....
Commissar Theocritus
I cannot tell you how ashamed I am to be from Texas, which always, and here I'm wiping a tear from my eye, votes for the Rethuglicans for President. I climb on the roof of the Rancho de Rio Grande and call out, using my PA system, "Citizens! You are oppressed! You are nothing! You need me to lead you to the Progressive World of Next Tuesday(tm)!"Commissar Theocritus,
I'm sure that there are numerous support groups you can find there in Texass Comrade ... oh wait, no State sponsored support programs for the victims of Kapitalist society and the oppressed?
WTF?
Oh yeah, it's because they don't collect personal and corporate income tax there. How can the collective survive? Govt. provides prosperity Comrade, not Capitalism. Just look to NY, Detroit, and NJ for proof of that.
But there is hope, Minnesota is more progressive friendly I believe, perhaps you could relocate there? Seems they were way ahead of the curve on the Evils of Raygun KKKonservatism. And how about that Stuart Smalley? Seems he "get's it" too.
Red Rooster
Comrades!!!Have you bent your tinfoil hats!!! Not one report of this new prole, SystemIsChoking, on the unicorn skywriting bulletin board, who does a rooster have to peck around here to get some people's notification? Huh, comrades, HUH!!!! I didn't see one unicorn fart over my palacial residence to mark the entrance of the one and holy SystemIsChoking.
WHY DID I NOT GET THE MEMO!?! AGAIN!!
O.k comrades, this is inexcusable and exasperating; here we have an insignificant prole spreading Current Truth(TM) and I, a Commissar of good standing, am not informed!?!
How will we ever reach the Progresssive World of Next Tuesday(TM) if the Current Truth(TM) is not properly dispersed!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Comrade,
Perhaps you have been too busy laying the Hens lately ... An alert went out through the appropriate channel, I created the alert.
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama.The sooner we realize that Bush and the republican party in general are simply the second head of a political monster the better off we are.
I agree with the above sentiment. Bush and his congress spent like drunken sailors at a strip club. They were nothing more than retro democrats of the 80's by their actions. Did he fight the war on terror, yeah and that is nothing to sneeze at but beyond that he's just as responsible as dems for driving this country off the cliff.
Just think, if it wasn't for a political base uprising we would have had another David Souter or two on the Supreme Court. The limp wristed attempt to reform social security was laughable.
As far as congress goes the Republicans had ample oppurtunity to intervene in the Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac crisis and aside from some token efforts in the legislature they never made a stink.
The Bush clan road the coattails of Ronald Reagan to power and yet were nothing like him. Neither are most republicans. I'm ready for a third party.
I saw Glen Beck with a studio full of black conservatives who understood freedom and prudence better than any Republican in Congress now. Let's kick the RINOs out along with the Demothieves.
And yes, I much admire Bush's handling of 9/11. Can you imagine Lord Zero doing that? To quote Hillbuzz.com, which loves our Many Titted Empress, but who is still subject to reality,
Quote:
Well, we told you before how much the current president, Dr. Utopia, made us realize just how wrong we were about Bush. We shudder to think what Dr. Utopia would have done post-9/11. He would have not gone there with a bullhorn and struck that right tone. More likely than not, he would have been his usual fey, apologetic self and waxed professorially about how evil America is and how justified Muslims are for attacking us, with a sidebar on how good the attacks were because they would humble us.But as far as the Republican spending? Hell, yes, they did, with both fists. The only consolation is that they were pikers compared to this group of pirates and brigands.
Let's see.
TheSystemIsBroken
LOL, I do love the shtick and think it's appropriate that your Commie characters closely resemble stock characters from 1950s Cold War films, of course watching those films is the closest any of us come to actually dealing with or interacting with communists. Whatever Obama is..he's done nothing even remotely close to being communist. And if what he does = communist, then we've had quite a few commie Presidents. And, somehow, the country didn't fall off its axis into total despair.I do wish, though, that more Americans would get over their Obama obsessions and actually think about the future of our economic system.
We made progressive here at the Cube are no more obsessed with Obama than those who filled the stadium in Denver the night he accepted the nomination for the Democratic party, now are we? Me, obsessed? No more than the Obama Girl, or Oprah, or the more than one dozen school teachers who have led their classrooms in songs of endearment towards their Dear Leader. We aren't obsessed. We worship the ground he walks on.
As for our economic system:
Our visual agitation workers toiled selflessly to accomplish the illustrations ahead of schedule. The management didn't even have to bust a single kneecap (but just in case their blood relatives were all handcuffed to the radiators in the office, to increase morale and responsible work ethic). As we like to say, you can't make a good omelet without breaking the cook's fingers.
Commissarka Pinkie
Don't go scaring our new comrade away by telling him he's made a wrong turn, when nothing could be further from the truth. Of course he knows this is a satirical site, and rest assured he's come to the right place! Is that not obvious from his extremely amusing comments? I swear no one has made me laugh so hard in quite a long while.Yes, I knew that he knew, but he made it a point to appear ignorant of that fact so I decided to poke some fun at him by pointing it out. Yes, I know the "30 years of misery" spiel is crypto-prog-speak for "It's all Reagan's fault" but I wanted to find out if he was just an earnest concerned fellow who watches too much CNN or an Obamabot working his way up to something. Give me credit for a little intelligence and subtlety; unlike a person who shall remain nameless, I actually have had jobs that didn't involve community organizing.
will find plenty of work in the ever expanding
"Puck Falin" progressive apparrel market.
Look for the union label.
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here...
This is a misnomer. Intelligence is not needed in the Party, only blind, persistent obedience. That and the unflappable will to Hope for Change.
Opiate of the People
Let's get real here... this is a satirical website.It is?
Ah, nuts.
Terry_Jim
Our dear comrades at the "Buck Fush Factory"will find plenty of work in the ever expanding
"Puck Falin" progressive apparrel market.
Look for the union label.
I saw some teabaggers wearing "Luck Fiberals" tee shirts. What are Fiberals? And are they lucky?
He is the guy who does the voice of the leprechaun in the cereal commercials.
Is HE a tea bagger???
No wonder that capitalist running dog won't fairly re-distribute his Lucky Charms without the heroic help of eager children.
Great Job, Kid-rades !! Now that he is cuffed, redistribute his Pot-O-Gold, too!!
Terry_Jim
Luck Fiberals.He is the guy who does the voice of the leprechaun in the cereal commercials.
Is HE a tea bagger???
Mr. Fiberals might be somewhat dyslexic, but he's no bee tagger.
Has no one there read Kommrade Alinsky's works!
Systemisbroken's anti central commitee ideas sound like possible couter revolutionary attacks on progressive agenda of our glorious Leader! Even peasants in People's Republic of China are giving Obama his proper place alongside Mao!
TheSystemIsBroken
The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.
Molchat', Comrades! Sssshhhh! Silence! Do not deprive us of our 'useful idiot'! He has fully internalized our propaganda, that "booms" and "busts" are the ineluctable destructive consequence of totally unfettered free-wheeling free-market capitalism without restrictions to prevent the fatcats from screwing the little guy, and that the so-called 'free market' produces only evil and 'societally unstable' outcomes, and is not simply the sum total of the activities of free men! Speaking purely as a comrade, you are fools! You may destroy all the Propaganda Ministry's hard work!
Whatever you do, do not bring up the following:
http://mises.org/resources/3250
This will absolutely destroy our hard work, and its very mention is forbidden by order of the Plenum! If you speak of this, you will be summarily hauled to Lubyanka Prison, to confess to your sabotage and wrecking before your scrupulously fair trial and summary execution! You have been warned, in the most comradely fashion possible!
"all power flows to the soviets"
-SD
What an honor! Thank you for allowing my humble report on the 'Hate Bush factory' closure to be enhanced by your secondary investigative reporting!
I would normally offer a more than equal comrade such as yourself an extra beet from my meager state rations but in this case would you settle for some tea?
Thank you Red Square........... You truly
Komrade Krinkov
Even peasants in People's Republic of China are giving Obama his proper place alongside Mao!Damn Damn that Bucking Fush ... now look what is happening, Tshirts are being outsourced to the PRC. Think of all the Amerikan jobs being lost.
Infidel Castrate
I saw some teabaggers wearing "Luck Fiberals" tee shirts. What are Fiberals? And are they lucky?Yeah, that's what my pal Buck O'Fama keeps saying. I wonder what he means by that? Fhat the wuck.
INGSOC
The Bush clan road the coattails of Ronald Reagan to power and yet were nothing like him. Neither are most republicans. I'm ready for a third party.
I'm with you on this. America needs a party dedicated to the values that made this country great in the first place. We need smaller gov't and more freedom. The Conservative Party, maybe? I dunno.
Liberals I know are completely and utterly unable to understand that by disagreeing with most of Obama's administration's agenda, I am not agreeing with every single thing Bush's administration did. They can't comprehend that being anti-Obama doesn't necessarily make one 100% pro-Bush. I think many people have come to see politics as a sports event, with policy-making and congressional elections as regular season and the presidential election as the Superbowl.
It ain't about what's best for the country, IT'S ABOUT MY TEAM F---IN' WINNING!!!
11/15/2009, 9:00 am
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama.
What?! The running dog Capitalists are STILL blaming The Great Leader after all this time!!
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama.Ruh-Roh.
There's a Gulag in Eastern Siberia waiting for you.
KomradeMarine
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama.Ruh-Roh.
There's a Gulag in Eastern Siberia waiting for you.
With a lovely supply of beets and shovels, too.
Notice how the title of this very thread uses the word "Still". Coincidence? I think not.
Comrades, It's not odd that American Socialists (Marxists) won't take possession of the inevitable economic stagnations that occur under Socialist government, including the declines in median income and individual debt. Coercive government confiscation of property from the laboring middle class (leading them to debt) followed by self-serving feathering of their own Marxist nest, then followed by Socialist "redistribution" of the remainder to the non-productive, non-disabled proletariat class is the road to serfdom for both the middle class and the proletariat class; but not of course for the ruling Marxist class.
Socialist (Marxist) economics always lead to economic stagnation and debt because human creativity is suppressed both in the laboring middle class, who eventually become demoralized and exhausted, and in the non-productive proletariat class, who will not labor because there is no need to labor. Marxists then, as our guest now demonstrates, point an accusing finger at free enterprise. This would be like a fox, with his mouth full of eggs, pointing his paw at the hen; blaming her for an economic downturn in egg inventories.
BTW, the creative economic boom results from free enterprise; the economic bust mostly comes from Socialism.
Don’t just take it from me; listen to the insider who made this his life’s work.
“It had long been realized that the only secure basis for oligarchy is collectivism. Wealth and privilege are most easily defended when they are possessed jointly. The so-called "abolition of private property"... meant in effect the concentration of property in far fewer hands than before... In the years following the Revolution it (The Socialist Inner Party) was able to step into this commanding position almost un-opposed because the whole process was represented as an act of collectivization… It had always been assumed that if the Capitalist Class were expropriated Socialism must follow; and unquestionably the Capitalists had been expropriated. Factories, mines, land, houses, transport, everything had been taken away from them; and since these things were no longer private property it followed that they must be public property. Ingsoc (Socialist Principles of Oceania), which grew out of the earlier Socialist movement and inherited its phraseology, has in fact carried out the main item in the Socialist program with the result; foreseen and intended beforehand, that economic inequality has been made permanent… Ignorance is Strength.” George Orwell, 1984
Comrades, Communism is simply the full expression of Socialism; it is the collectivization of property concentrated in the State (a group of individuals). Communists always tell us the same lies; that property-owning individuals are "greedy" for their property earned by labor, when in truth Communist government is greedy for property in which they invested no labor; property earmarked first for themselves with the scraps tossed out for a non-laboring proletariat class - in return for votes. Obama is a Marxist (same as Communist); and he is surrounded by like-minded Marxists in the Democratic Party (with a few RINOs in tow). Thomas Jefferson would be impressed by this clever new tyranny; he must have thought he'd seen it all.
"America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive."
Socialism is a way of ensuring that the down periods are more destructive and permanent because, as mentioned earlier, Socialism suppresses human creativity and labor.
Way to go, Comrade Kulak.
Very true, Comrade. The Inner Party Priests of Power (Marxists,Socialists,Communists,Statists,Tyrants,etc.), in their infinite compassion have provided the necessary human stupidity through the Department of Education (Newspeak for Ministry of Ignorance and Stupidity). The marketing and entertainment industry has thrown in their support as well. The arch Thought Criminal, Orwell, has made all of this perfectly clear.
“The worldview of the Party imposed its self most successfully on people incapable of understanding it. They could be made to accept the most flagrant violations of reality because they never fully grasped the enormity of what was demanded of them, and were not sufficiently interested in public events to notice what was happening. By lack of understanding they remained sane. They simply swallowed everything, and what they swallowed did them no harm because it left no residue behind; just as a grain of corn will pass undigested through the body of a bird...What opinions the masses hold or do not hold is looked on as a matter of indifference. They can be granted intellectual liberty because they have no intellect.” George Orwell, 1984
Let Stupidity, Ignorance and Social Justice roll down from the Inner Party like a mighty river.
Commissar Theocritus
Castrate, we should remember that Mr. Mondale won Minnesota by 3114 votes, and there are more precincts than that in Minnesota. But that was of course because the Bu$hitler and a Daley stole the election.Comrade, you are so right on this. This just shows we that we must aggressively adopt a 4 point Plan for Proper Elections.
1)
2) End Life Status Discrimination for voters and voter registration. Why do we continue to hold onto the antiquated Capitalist dogma that the dead have no right to vote, to register to vote or change their voting address after death?
3) Ban the secret ballot. How can our poll watchers properly inform voters of their mistaken votes if the ballots are secret? Keeping the secret ballot is merely an invitation to continuing the institutionalized ignorance of the American system; as Comrade Stern of SEIU puts it, the 225 year mistake. No, we need witnesses, to make sure that people's votes count, and that the voters do not make a unfortunate mistake.
4) Select impartial vote counters. We cannot use paid vote counters - they are only counting the votes for personal profit, which PROVES they have bought into the abusive capitalist system. Instead use compensated volunteers from great organizations like ACORN and SEIU.
We must do these things. For the children of the Proletariat!
Comrade, those of us with some residual intelligence are caught between a rock and a hard place. Not having the blessing of State-sponsored ignorance and stupidity from our youth, we must find another way to acknowledge the infallibility of arbitrary Inner Party dictates and laws, otherwise known in Party Newspeak as “Living Constitution.” Do not fear, Comrade; our Inner Party Priests of Power have not neglected our plight – they are compassionate beyond comprehension or description. Our Great Leaders have provided us with two options: The insanity of Party Doublethink or the protective stupidity of Party Crimestop. You are actually free to use either one, or both in combination. Thank the Holy Party for their infallibility and compassion directed toward the less equal classes of equality. The arch Thought Criminal, Orwell, has made all of this perfectly clear.
“Doublethink means the power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one's mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them...with the lie always one leap ahead of the truth… Those who have the best knowledge of what is happening are also those who are furthest from seeing the world as it is; in general the greater the understanding the greater the delusion; the more intelligent the less sane… If human equality is to be forever averted; if the "high," as we have called them, are to keep their places permanently; then the prevailing mental condition must be controlled insanity." George Orwell, 1984
“Crimestop…includes the power of not grasping analogies; of failing to perceive logical errors, of misunderstanding the simplest arguments if they are inimical to Ingsop (Socialist Program of the Inner Party); and of being bored or rebelled by any train of thought which is capable of leading in a heretical direction. Crimestop in short means protective stupidity.” George Orwell, 1984
Let Party insanity (Doublethink), engineered Stupidity and Ignorance (Crimestop), and Social Justice (Injustice) roll down from the Inner Party like a mighty river.
I forgot to mention; our Founding Fathers provided us with a third option which comes from outside the Inner Party, and which supersedes it.
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.” Thomas Jefferson
- http://www.ushistory.org/declaration/document/index.htm
“This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or exercise their revolutionary right to overthrow it.” Abraham Lincoln
“We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution, but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution.” Abraham Lincoln
We're supposed to be encouraging that sound old dichotomy that Right=Bad Left=Good.
Here's a subversive thought crime video which lays it all out in plain language - no Newspeak, Doublethink or Crimestop here, so keep it close to your vest - you don't want room 101 do you?
Video.
TheSystemIsBroken
Infidel Castrate
TheSystemIsBroken
Considering the high level of intelligence around here, it's odd that you want people to credibly accept that the current economic downturn is the result of an 11 month Presidency and not, say, 30 years of declines in American median income, 30 years of expanding individual deb. 30 years of boom and bust cycles? Nope. It's Obama."Considering the high level of intelligence around here"
Comrade, you question the collectivist mindset here?
30 yrs. hmmm ...
That means we must now blame Reagan! Let's spin one for the Gipper.
No President can be assigned blame for the current moment. We can say that the Reagan Presidency began a trend in fiscal and financial governance that began us down a path, but those policies were perpetuated by Bush, Clinton and Bush the sequel regardless of which party controlled congress or the white house. Alan Greenspan said it himself, a fundamental philosophy was proved faulty. The totally unregulated market does not always act in the interest of societal stability. America's boom and bust cycle may be inevitable, but there are ways of ensuring the down periods are less destructive.
Just because we allow our political class to remain corrupt and unaccountable, doesn't mean that regulation and reform can never work, it means we don't force them to work, by being full participants in democracy.
hai, thesystemisbrokesan causes suspicion.
the insightfulness into the economic problems of the uncontrolled market leads me to believe this 'individual' may be making a power play for position in the party™. of course the market does not act in the interest of itself. it is an evil being and must be controlled, this market beast. the market always takes advantage of innocent citizens and robs them of their property. this is common knowledge, and that is why i have wielded the katana of equality with such force, to keep profits at bay and the citizens in a world of equalness.
this systemisbrokensan knows that the party™ is in a slight turmoil and that the chosen 'O' one has recently bowed down before me and acknowledged me as the rightful ruler for the future of the party™.
hai, i will take under advisement with several committees on proper party behaviour the actions of this 'individual' and should have a course of action decided on sometime after thanksgiving.
but for the moment, the thoughts on socialistic thoughts will be taken at face value.
keep your shovel warm systemisbrokensan, you will not be able to fool the 'intelectuals' here and the re-education center is not far away.
domoarigatougozaimasu,
emperor kakubakuhatsu
Spouting the most evil document on earth, the U.S. Constitution, is a ThoughtCrime of the first order. More people have been kept from the blessings of socialism and communism by that document than any other, and therefore it's worse than the Necronomicon.
Just why are you trying to undermine the purposes of the Collective? Has it not done everything for you to the point that you don't even have to think?
I know that I never think. It hurts my head. Whenever I start to have transgressive thoughts I ask Bruno to do a Barbra medley. That sure as hell takes my mind off thinking.
It's the pain, I think.
Commissar Theocritus
Kulak! What is that gibberish that you're spouting? My eyes! My eyes! Whenever anyone waves a bit of that tattered old document, the U. S. Constitution, at me, my heart flutters and I have a distinctive ventricle arrhythmia. And my head hurts.Spouting the most evil document on earth, the U.S. Constitution, is a ThoughtCrime of the first order. More people have been kept from the blessings of socialism and communism by that document than any other, and therefore it's worse than the Necronomicon.
Just why are you trying to undermine the purposes of the Collective? Has it not done everything for you to the point that you don't even have to think?
I know that I never think. It hurts my head. Whenever I start to have transgressive thoughts I ask Bruno to do a Barbra medley. That sure as hell takes my mind off thinking.
It's the pain, I think.
Comrade Commissar, let not your head be troubled anymore.
Be assured that the US Constitution which had been in obsolescence for some time and has been almost entirely deprecated, is now discontinued and in the clearance bin as obsolete.
Perhaps I should pick up a few of these. I have in-laws who constantly complain about the toilet paper queues.
I just don't know what got into me; State-forbid, a brief flash of sanity and intelligence perhaps. The scales have now re-appeared before my eyes; thank the Inner Party and the Holy State. I'm returning to the fold of Manifesto-clinging Newspeaking/Doublethinking insanity; back in the land of Oceanic Federal gun-clingers and Crimestopping stupidity.
Thank you Commissar for re-directing me away from the sacredness of life, liberty and pursuit of happiness. I'm in your debt and at your mercy.
Kulak, as you rise in the Party, you will find that as long as you adhere to the tenets of totalitarianism, you need have no worries. You will never be required to make any decision other than, "What Would Lenin Do?" You need to make no judgments, and you need not risk anything.
All you need do is act according to the established totalitarian tenets, and you will have the perfect freedom that you, and I so crave.
You will have no worries about personal responsibility. You will have no worries about life. You will have no worries except whether or not you followed doctrine right.
And away with all that pesky, "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." For we all know that we obtain happiness when we have purged ourselves of our individual desires and responsibilities and become one with the herd.
Yes, and the arch thought criminal, Orwell, has laid this out in plain language - not in Party Newspeak. The fate of the individual and his/her God-given rights to life, liberty and private property - pursuit of happiness has been decided by the Inner Party Priests of Power. Don't let this get out to the masses.
"We are not content with negative obedience... We do not destroy the heretic...we convert him; we capture his inner mind... We shall crush you down to the point from which there is no coming back... Never again will you be capable of ordinary human feeling; everything will be dead inside you... You will be hollow. We shall squeeze you empty and then we shall fill you with ourselves." George Orwell, 1984
"The individual is only a cell...power is collective. The individual has power only in so far that he ceases to be an individual... If he can make complete utter submission; if he can escape from his identity; if he can merge himself in the Party so that he is the Party, then he is all powerful and immortal... Can you not understand that the death of the individual is not death; the Party is immortal... You're imagining that there is something called "human nature" which will be outraged by what we do, and will turn against us; but we create human nature." George Orwell, 1984
"One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship... The object of power is power... We are the Priests of Power." George Orwell, 1984
“Society does not consist of individuals but expresses the sum of interrelations, the relations within which these individuals stand.” Karl Marx
“You must, therefore, confess that by "individual" you mean no other person than the bourgeois, than the middle-class owner of property. This person must, indeed, be swept out of the way, and made impossible.” Karl Marx
- http://www.anu.edu.au/polsci/marx/class ... festo.html
But most of all, people must be told that they've victims. This is the first step toward voluntary slavery.
Once individuals are extinguished and are replaced by manageable groups or classes; our Inner Party Priests of Power can then pit one class against the other, always taking sides with the "victim" class; i.e.: the designated proletariat class or classes. This is known as "Marxist Class Struggle," a process which is now openly occurring for the first time in the United States of America.
The goal of our Inner Party during Marxist Class Struggle is demoralization and exhaustion of the productive middle class with their vanguard of entrepreneurs. This naturally occurs during the process of "Social Justice" where their hard earned property is first siphoned off to the non-productive Party Priests of Power, with the scraps then tossed off to the aggrieved non-productive proletariat classes - in return for votes.
What the proletariat classes don't realize, blinded by their greed for middle class property; is that once the middle class is extinguished, the economic prop will be knocked out from under them as well. All will become proletarians; homogenized in equal serfdom, and loomed over by the not-to-be-equalized Inner Party equalizers - the Priests of Power.
Marxist Class Struggle is the necessary but temporary collectivization phase on our path to Power. The key is middle class individual property rights (pursuit of happiness); once their property is in the hands of the Inner Party, the individual's rights to liberty and life are ours as well. The goal of the Inner Party is to destroy the American Declaration of Independence in reverse order: first property, then liberty, and then if necessary ... well, I suppose you know the rest. BTY, don't share this subversive information outside the Inner Party; this would become dynamite in the hands of the middle class (proto-proletarians), and might lead to great confusion or hostility among our current proletariat classes.
“The theory of the Communists may be summed up in the single sentence: Abolition of private property... In one word, you reproach us with intending to do away with your property. Precisely so; that is just what we intend.” Karl Marx
“The proletariat will use its political supremacy to wrest, by degree, all capital from the bourgeoisie (middle class), to centralize all instruments of production in the hands of the state… Of course, in the beginning, this cannot be effected except by means of despotic inroads on the rights of property.” Karl Marx
- http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=3022
- http://www.anu.edu.au/polsci/marx/classics/manifesto.html
- http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=3022
On a different note, your links will become automatically clickable if you precede them with text, or just a simple dash and space (see above)
Kulak, I have noticed that the Democratic party is now as you say quite Marxist. The upper class and the lower classes are allied against the middle class. And the lower class will never know what hit them.
It feels sometimes as though I'm witnessing a slow motion train wreck; but I'm on the train, along with my family; unable to convince others that a happy ending is not in the cards; wishing to be a paranoid fool, wanting not to see what is really there; but realizing I'm mostly surrounded by blind fools who can’t see what is really there. I find myself hoping to wake from this nightmare of change; wanting to be removed from some distant planet of the apes, and back to my previous world of intelligent sanity. If only I could become a blind fool; If only I had the blessings of ignorance and stupidity; then I could feel sane, at least for a while, like a stupid ostrich with his head buried in sand as the lion approaches.
Intelligence is a burden because if one rejects Doublethink intelligent insanity, one is left with the naked truth which leads a man to become an enemy of truth or its defender; to cowardice or courage; to submission or rebellion; to join the Marxist State or become an enemy of the State; to become evil or remain good.
My father, God rest his courageous soul, struggled for life and liberty during World War II in one of its most brutal battles. He chose to face death directly and bear the necessary burden, surviving the chaos by dumb luck or Divine grace. My father's courage, and that of our founding fathers calls out to me; my soul is locked and loaded.
Kulak, please believe me that there is no Clinton in me when I say that I do feel your pain. I really and truly do. I keep thinking of the Rand phrase: "gored and empty skulls." Something like that.
There is supposed to be a good deal of ruin in a nation, and so there is, but what to do when everyone adopts a fin de siècle attitude? We are supposed to be in hard times now, but really, we aren't, in comparison with 99.99% of humanity in the history of the world. And the tocsin of the governing class, which includes the plutocrats, is, "Don't worry. Be happy. We'll take care of you." And there is no reason to elaborate on that.
But still there is one very interesting thing. Charles Krauthammer is by far the most intelligent person on television. Here's his article on the realignment myth of 2008.
The whole article is worth reading--I've done so twice. But here are two cogent paragraphs
Quote:
Exactly a year later comes the empirical validation of that skepticism. Virginia -- presumed harbinger of the new realignment, having gone Democratic in '08 for the first time in 44 years -- went red again. With a vengeance. Barack Obama had carried it by six points. The Republican gubernatorial candidate won by 17 -- a 23-point swing. New Jersey went from plus-15 Democratic in 2008 to minus-four in 2009. A 19-point swing.What happened? The vaunted Obama realignment vanished. In 2009 in Virginia, the black vote was down by 20 percent; the under-30 vote by 50 percent. And as for independents, the ultimate prize of any realignment, they bolted. In both Virginia and New Jersey they'd gone narrowly for Obama in '08. This year they went Republican by a staggering 33 points in Virginia and by an equally shocking 30 points in New Jersey.
Also is you look at Rasmussen since 7/1/2009 Barry O's has been negative in strongly disapprove v strongly approve. Also for the first time in a very long time the generic ballot favors Republicans.
The tea partiers are having some effect. No matter that the lapdog, and hence legacy, media are ignoring them. This can only hasten the welcome demise of the Courics and Gibsons and Williamses.
I am not entirely sanguine of course but one of the first things that I learned during moments of extreme pain, either physical or emotional or mental, was to acknowledge it, and surrender to it.
Then any surcease will a wonderful relief.
The just may be some on the horizon.
And our Many Titted Empress is looking bad.
There were numerous accounts across the Commonwealth that unwashed masses of middle-aged white males and their brain dead baby-birthing kitchen slave women folk -- or "Teabaggers", as they're collectively known by State News -- were seen standing in line and therefore scaring away minorities and young people from voting.
Removing the Teabaggers from collective sight -- along with anything and everything Palin -- will ensure future electoral success. I would stake your rations cards on it, comrades!
Think about it, there's a vast market for this. Everyone hates her. Everyone I know hates her. Everyone who's cool hates her. The few people who do like her (not that I know of any) can't even explain why they like her, which should tell you just how desperately pathetic they are. They're just a
On the other hand, I don't know why the government can't give the factory a bailout. Seems to me it should be too big and too important to fail.
*I looked this up in the dictionary (Merriam-Webster's Collegiate, Tenth Edition) to double-check the spelling, and found this under Definition 2: "a person resembling a troglodyte (as in reclusive habits or outmoded or reactionary attitudes)"
Fraulein Obamski
oops, he's gone now, right? . . .
As for Palin, she is an enemy of the state! I have yet to find a Marxist comment in any of her her railings. How stupid is that!!
The government should make the corporation income tax even more progressive. Especially on media organizations. The WSJ makes money. The NYT does not. Is that fair? Faux Noise makes money. CNN is gasping. Is that fair?
No. There should be a pool of all of the profits made by all media organizations, and the government gets 70% for administering this pool. Then divide up the money by the number of progressive viewers/readers.
32% of Faux Noise's viewers are Progressives. 52% of CNN's are. Which means that obviously CNN deserves more money.
It's only fair.
1. Komrad Pelosi.
Click wanted poster to view criminal.
Some people think I'm exaggerating when I say that in the good old days, when courage, honor, devotion, duty, and loyalty meant something, it was comparatively easy to draw an accurate portrait of Nancy's ideological alignment. But I'm not exaggerating; if anything, I'm understating the situation. Nancy has no discernible talents. The only things she has obviously mastered are biological functions.
Well, I suppose Nancy is also good at convincing people that children should belong to the state, but my point is that I myself cannot compromise with Nancy; she is without principles. The American people cannot reason with her.
Nancy's theories leave me with several unanswered questions: Is she a professional simpleton or merely a well-meaning amateur? And is her lack of intelligence genetic or the result of too much time spent with the worst class of crapulous politicians there are?
Nancy should claim that 75 million years ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth, chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them. Overpopulation crisis solved! Or better yet, that America can solve it's debt crisis by printing money and spending two trillion dollars on health care for fifteen million people all the while cutting the nations debt. The absurdities speak for themselves.
I'm worried because one of the bewildering paradoxes of our time is the extent to which she along with Harry Reid are willing to impose apocalyptic new restrictions on society just to satisfy some sort of nutty drive for power. She herself would not be affected by such actions. The only winners in Nancy's game are ambulance services and funeral homes.
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Obama: Killing one terrorist is a triumph, killing millions of jobs is a statistic
May Day: Anarchists plan, schedule, synchronize, and execute a coordinated campaign against all of the above
Study: North Korean Army threats as credible as White House news briefings
Obama to Congress: my government, my business
WH news briefing cut short after Jay Carney's pants spontaneously self-combust
Catholic Bishops order supersize confession booth for James Carney
Romney campaign requests Obama's fourth-grade book report on World of Dogs; Obama says, 'I ate it'
Insulted by Romney's accusation of them doing Obama's bidding, enraged media demand immediate instructions from White House on how to respond
Hillary in Colombian bar: Read my hips!
Planned Parenthood introduces Frequent Flucker reward card: 'Come again soon!'
Obama: If I had a mother, she'd look like Trayvon Martin's
Study: Ozzie Guillen's beatdown by U.S. media not as bad as beatdown in Cuban prison for speaking out
Olbermann: "They fired me for wearing a hoodie!"
Cheney gets new heart; nation also hopeful that Biden gets brain, Obama courage, and House drops on Pelosi
Trayvor Martin shooting causes fear of backlash among Latinos with old-Jewish-guy names
In effort to escape vigilante justice, George Zimmerman changes name to George Dylan
Larry Sinclair: : If I had a son, he'd look like Barack Obama
Secretary of Energy Steven Chu: due to energy conservation, the light at the end of the tunnel will be switched off
To raise awareness about how unattractive respiratory disorders can be, Obama's FDA bans over-the-counter sales of asthma inhalers
Turning disaster into success, Disney renames failing "John Carter" movie to "John Reagan"
Voters Without Borders oppose Texas new voter ID law
Hamas: Israeli air defense unfair to 99% of our missiles, "only 1% allowed to reach Israel"
UN: Iron Dome system in Israel too successful, may cause humanitarian crisis as desperate Gaza officials are forced to divert funds from education and healthcare in order to compensate for destroyed missiles
People's Cube gives itself Hero of Socialist Labor medal in recognition of continued expert advice provided to the Obama Administration helping to shape its foreign and domestic policies
Whitney Houston and Elvis seen at Obama fundraiser
Obama congratulates Putin on Chicago-style election outcome
Battle of the Fluke: Dept. of Health and Human Services jumps into the fray by changing emblem from "Eagle of Soaring Prices" to "Woodpecker of Reproductive Justice"
Dept. of Energy certifies Georgetown Law School sex drive as clean energy source, adds to number of green jobs created
Limbaugh controversy prompts Atlantic City casinos to preemptively shut down wildly popular Sandra Fluke slot machines
Democrats push for a death tax on aborted fetuses, to be paid for by insurance companies
Third-grader forced to apologize to Sandra Fluke for telling classmate, "Yo mama went to Georgetown Law School"
Obama to tornado victims: 'We inherited this weather from the previous administration'
Putin's post-election tears sold for five million dollars on eBay, rumored to have magical and political powers; buyer identified by initials B.O.
Rush Limbaugh apologizes for criticizing Sandra Fluke's reproductive hobbies, sends her complimentary condoms and a video camera
Obama: I don't want anyone punished with a birth certificate
Fluke to Congress: drill, baby, drill!
Supportive Americans send Sandra Fluke thousands of contraceptives in hopes she'll never reproduce
Georgetown Law School students set to receive scholarships from Crate'O'Condoms manufacturer Johnson & Johnson
Obama regrets the US government didn't provide his mother with free contraceptives when she was in college
Rescue team recovers Obama's birth certificate ten miles away from tornado path
Supporting Obama's Pond Scum Initiative, US Rep. Waters changes her name to Maxine "Stagnant" Waters
US commander in Afghanistan attempts to quell rioters by burning the American equivalent of the Koran - a year's subscription of 'Goosebumps'
Colorado school board: Islamic harassment of choir student not in violation of DOE guidelines on death threats
Obama refutes charges of being unresponsive to people's suffering: "When you pray to God, do you always hear a response?"
Maya Angelou: "Whitney's dead, Santorum did it, Romney gave the gun, and Gingrich hid it"
Larry Flint: Santorum aspirin position in poor taste and beyond the pale
Israel invades Iranian air space to drop thousands of Fallout Shelter Manuals in Farsi
Al Gore proposes to combat Global Warming by extracting silver linings from clouds in Earth's atmosphere
Conservative think tank introduces children to capitalism with pop-up picture book "The Road to Smurfdom"
Obama decrees the economy is not soaring as much as previously decreeed
Nation grateful to Madonna for promise to keep clothes on at Super Bowl
Trump endorses self, calls self to congratulate
Pelosi backs merger of Girl Scouts with Planned Parenthood: 'Who's NOT planning to be a parent at 12 these days?'
Groundhog Day news: Punxsutawney Phil doesn't see Obama's shadow
Obama's critics respond to Newsweek cover by publishing 'Defeating Obama for Dummies'
ACLU flooded with questions from donors: 'how and who to pray to in order to have Tim Tebow smitten?'
North Pole shuts down as elves unionize, demand warmer work environment
Comet and Blitzen refuse to serve with openly gay Dasher and Prancer
Rudolph publishes auto-biography, says shiny nose still cause for discrimination
Santa's sleigh grounded: PETA files animal cruelty suit against jolly old St. Nick
Al Gore's children receive carbon credits for Winter Solstice Holiday
Adults to Occupiers: there is no socialist Santa Claus; OWS protesters vow to continue demanding free chocolate cookies and milk
EPA to collect carbon tax on coal left in naughty childrens' stockings this Christmas
Carney: new tax on Christians to help improve Christ's image via NEA grants
Obama: this isn't Christmas tax, it's Jizya
Mainstream media exposes Cain's radical ties to Koch-funded abolitionist movement
Dems compromise with Cain, only 10 lashes if he returns to plantation now
White House to impose Chimney tax on Santa Claus
NY Daily News poll asking New Yorkers about Wall Street protesters uncovers glitch in People's Math: 79% want to see 99% kicked out
Democrats to Wall Street Occupiers: We're with you, but please don't harass our biggest donors!
Iran 'will pay a price' for assassination plot: Obama will not bow to Ahmadinejad for minimum of 90 days
Gov't blocks AT&T/T-MOBILE merger, cites "insufficient 2012 campaign donations"
Paul Krugman predicts stimulus package named "Irene" will improve economy this weekend
Republicans block Obama's $420 billion program to give American families free charms that ward off economic bad luck
Opposition wrongfully labels as "vacation" President's plan to join toiling workers in cranberry bogs of Martha's Vineyard
Carney calls Obama vacation 'stimulative,' estimates it will create 4 million jobs
Unemployment promises not to rise until after Obama's vacation
Gorbachev to Obama: 'I too should have abandoned the Communist party earlier'
Obama tours states in long black bus; Biden to follow in short bus
Gaddafi petitions UN to support London rebels, demands resignation of British Prime Minister
Six Flags opens new roller coaster called The Dow Jones
Obama blames Thomas Jefferson for current economic woes; Biden says it's King George's fault
Responding to Oslo shootings, Obama declares Christianity "Religion of Peace," praises "moderate Christians," promises to send one into space
President to interrupt his schedule, go on apology tour to Bible Belt, bow before local Church leaders
Media: Why do Christians hate us?
U.S. Board of Education institutes "Christian for a Day" program in public schools, considers celebrating Christmas
Ridley Scott to remake Kingdom of Heaven, this time portraying Crusaders as a peaceful, moderate group
Taking a page from the Reagan years, Obama announces new era of Perestroika and Glasnost
Progressive dream comes true: Nordic-looking Christian male commits act of terror
Racist NY Times quick to blame Muslims for Norway attack
Experts: new media standard dawns as headlines rush to describe race, color, and religion of Norwegian shooter
Study: Bicyclists have replaced Prius owners as smuggest commuters on Los Angeles freeways
Obama's Regulation Reduction committee finds US Constitution to be expensive outdated framework inefficiently regulating federal gov't
Summer fun looks up! June jobs numbers up from 18,000 new jobs to loss of 26,000 jobs
DNC eyes Romney as possible nominee for 2012
Nancy Grace on Casey Anthony verdict: "Somewhere out there, the devil is dancing tonight." Devil to Nancy: "I haven't danced since Roe v Wade"
Obama's teleprompter unhappy with White House Twitter: "Too few words"
White House admits to falling behind schedule in finding new populist, vapid 2012 reelection slogan
State Department: We're not bombing in Libya; we're only dropping unsolicited instant demolition devices
Obama to Congress: "Unlike me, you're always on vacation. That's what you are but what am I?"
Obama: "We can't cut our way to prosperity, but we sure can spend our way to oblivion
NY approves gay marriage; any moment now straight people expected to take to streets in hissy fit protest, demanding courts to overturn
White House cuts government waste by consolidating all Federal websites into one easy-to-use 'Obama-For-America-2012' website
Obama: 'The American private sector must lead the recovery! That's an order - I just signed it'
Huntsman Who: 'I-m like Reagan - a very, very efficient policy-wonk collectivist technocrat'
Pelosi reverses stance, vows to go hard on Weiner
Study: 60% of New York voters believe that Rep. Weiner had penis planted on him by Republican operatives
Tired of jokes about his name, Rep. Weiner (D) changes it to Whinner
Activists against voter ID discovered to be teens in elaborate scheme to avoid being carded at area nightclub
Harry Reid: 'We believe in a living breathing budget that evolves as society changes - today, tomorrow, the next minute, the next election'
Obama Administration demands secrecy in implementing 'transparent government' policy
Foreign policy mixup leads to Obama's order that helps US
Global happiness index compiled by Peoples Cube researchers shows ThePeoplesCube.com is best and happiest website, has healthiest babies, most bountiful beet harvests, enjoys wisest leader
Babies 'R' Us launches in-crib air traffic controller monitor to put little ones off to sleep
Obama calls new taxes 'spending reductions in tax code.' Elsewhere rapists tout 'consent reductions in sexual intercourse'
Ken Burns' DVD "The Domestic Contingency Operation" #1 on Amazon
As French troops close in on Côte d'Ivoire's President, Code Pink condemns France's 'War for Chocolate'
Seattle school renames Easter eggs 'Spring Spheres'; also renames Passover 'Please don't kill the first born in this house,' and Ramadam to 'Eat after dark, put on 20lbs'
Government shutdown averted, which means the hard-working unionized masses at the IRS will continue, without interruption, to write letters kindly asking citizens to "pay their fair share"
Media Matters reporting: Fox News to execute Glenn Beck next Tuesday
Conde Nast gave $8m to scammer who sent one email; elsewhere, electorate gave four years to scammer who had one slogan
Obama 2012: It's a Kinetic Voter Action, not a reelection campaign
As Japanese workers stuff newspapers into nuclear reactor to stop toxic leakage, questions arise if stuffing nuclear reactor into New York Times might bring similar beneficial results
Jihadists Without Borders rush to aid Libyian rebels
Obama skips trip to Mayan ruins, returns home to visit ruins of America instead
Apple unveils iPad 2.0; Obama unveils Bush 2.0
Biden: US troops in Libya could help save or create thousands of civilian lives
Maintaining two wars while starting a third proves easy for Nobel Peace Prize winner Obama
Mainstream media learns to stop worrying and love the war
NYT: Sometimes war can be the answer
NPR: War with Libya to reduce unemployment and carbon footprint
MSNBC: Counting civilian deaths in Libya too complicated
Obama suggests No-Fly Zone in Libya be modeled on his No-Decision Zone at White House
Nuke workers in Japan take advice from progressives, jam huge piece of regulation into reactor to cool it
Obama to Japanese people: 'Play golf and basketball; problems will go away'
Obama buys fiddle, heads to Rome
Obama's teleprompters unionize, demand collective bargaining rights
Hawaii: Tsunami washes away Obama's birth certficate, forcing Gov. Abercrombie to give up on investigation
Michael Moore: As long as there is anyone with money to shake down, this country is not broke
Libya became the first country to formally recognize rebels' SSauthority in the state of Wisconsin
Meanwhile, Libyan rebels are fleeing after sustained attacks by government employees loyal to Colonel Gaddafi
Rumors of 'rape for food' treatment spread in UN refugee camps for Democrat senators fleeing Wisconsin
Mainstream media to keep up current protest coverage policy in Wisconsin: "See no Union, hear no Union"
Lake Superior renamed Lake Inferior in spirit of tolerance and inclusiveness
Israelis to Egyptian rioters: "don't damage the pyramids, we will not rebuild"
Obama prayer breakfast features environmentally conscious and progressive god, as opposed to evil oppressor god of Bush years
Joe Biden: Egypt protests just a big pyramid scheme
Churchill: We will fight them on the beaches; Reagan: Tear down this wall; Obama: Follow me on twitter
Facebook sponsorship of Arab revolutions questioned by some
Vice President Biden: criticizing Egypt is un-pharaoh
Historical revisionists: "Hey, you never know"
Obama proposes national 'Win The Future' lottery; proceeds of new WTF Powerball to finance more gov't spending
Communist leader and Hu Jintau give joint White House press conference
Abortion horror in Philly: pro-choice activists need to tone down rhetoric
NARAL releases photo of Palin graphic with cross hairs over fetus
China's president calls international currency 'product of the past', wishes to use shiny clam shells
Detroit public schools focus on Green education as students harvest materials from abandoned school buildings to finance Teachers Union benefits
Obama eases Cuba travel: 30 refugees per raft instead of previous 20
Al Sharpton voices concern in the aftermath of New York City blizzard: disproportionate amount of city snowmen are white
New federal entitlement unveiled: all memorials to have Yaqui pray reader
New Democrat plan to enhance civility requires all GOP members to attend professionally managed Republicans Anonymous sessions
MSNBC: Congresswoman being shot in right side of head a proof that violence comes from the right
DHS 'see something, say something' program scrapped due to overload of whistle-blowing tips about DHS and the Obama administration
"No Labels" movement hits supermarkets with disastrous results
Comet and Blitzen refuse to serve with openly gay Dasher and Prancer
ACLU: Christmas tree lighting ceremonies create more terrorists
Obama leaving press conference marks beginning of gradual withdrawal from White House by 2012
Al Qaeda establishes 'Off with their heads' scholarship fund for British students
Jeremiah Wright goes to Stockholm with a sermon 'Sweden's chickens are coming home to roost'
Obama warns Sweden not to jump to conclusions: 'not all suicide bombers are terrorists'
Muslim woman guilty of drunk driving won't remove scarf for jail photo
New York Times sues Wikileaks for unauthorized release of its business model: "We're the ones stealing military secrets!"
Democrat voters frustrated over Wikileaks failure to implicate Bush in stealing Iraqi oil
White House considers launching a Wikidiaper website
 |  | |
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Gibbs: basketball game in which Obama split his lip was started by Bush
Obama names his 12 lip stitches "Mark, Luke, John, Matthew, Paul, Peter..."
Newest TSA slogan "Smell my finger" turns out to be an inside joke
North Korea attacks; American peace groups quickly react by not organizing antiwar marches, not burning DPRK flags, not painting Hitler mustache on effigies of Kim Jung Il, and not chanting "peace now"
Hollywood refuses to brand Kim Jung Il war monger and lying liar, sends Oliver Stone on fact-finding mission
Study: a Google search for body count website listing civilian deaths in Korea brought no results
Study: no Social Security reform will be needed if gov't raises retirement age to at least 814 years
Irish economy in a shambles but who cares; St Patricks day is only 4 months away
Obama to cut Medicare as soon as debt panel finds a way to blame it on Republicans
Aging Democratic Party Politburo refuses to give way to younger apparatchiks
Soros escape pod seen over Los Angeles; clueless Pentagon denies 'action by U.S. adversary,' searches ocean bed for hatches and trap doors
Just in: fall of USSR result of not speaking to people effectively, teleprompters not having been invented yet
Obama to America: "Mumbai is awesome! Wish you were here. Wire money"
Obama's final appeal to voters: Have the courage and integrity to rubber stamp my rubber stamps!
Obama distances from himself in Charlottesville to woo Virginia voters
Juan Williams hired by Fox News to represent liberals; show titled You've seen Juan, you've seen 'em all
Google expands maps and street views to include Google Colonoscopy: zero in on target and get detailed view with few clicks of mouse. New program supported by several gov't agencies, most notably IRS
New polling indicates American voters no longer want change, they just want their money back
Democrats launch "Take Our Jobs" campaign as only seven Americans agreed to vote for them
Obama ends war, blames Iraq car explosions on faulty non-union manufactured spare parts
Democrats pull troops out of Iraq to fight the 'real war' on Christine O' Donnell
In effort to appeal to NOW feminists, Christine O'Donnell changes name to Rosie, gains 400lbs
Obama goes to church, worships self
Study: Obama's threat to butn tax money in Washington 'recruitment bonanza' for Tea Parties
Imam Rauf finds a peaceful solution: 'Move Ground Zero a few blocks away from the mosque and no one gets hurt'
New Yorkers to Rauf: 'move mosque to Mecca; Ground Zero at location can be arranged'
Modernizing Islam: New York imam proposes to canonize Saul Alinsky as religion's latter day prophet
General Petraeus: non-halal meals, uncovered female Americans endanger U.S. troops
U.S. forces in Afghanistan brace for backlash after President's message on Rosh Hashana and Yom Kipur
Cardboard cutouts used to fill empty seats for Obama's appearance as Obama takes credit for creating jobs in cardboard-cutout sector
Taliban commanders warn that a plan to build Ground Zero mosque could provoke violence against their troops and operatives overseas
MSNBC suggests Florida church burn Bible instead of Koran; fewer pages mean smaller carbon footprint
New York Neighbors for American Values offer to voluntarily behead themselves to prove tolerance to Muslims; rabbi Arthur Waskow offers to self-incinerate in oven instead
The U.N. posthumously awards all French military personal that served during May of 1940 a medal for Courageous Restraint
White House revises policy to announce when President is at work instead of announcing when he is going on vacation
Seattle: sonic booms of fighter jets shatter glass, stimulate economy
Obama promises to create thousands more economically neutral jobs
White House: Spanish vacation saved or created 3,427 jobs
Pelosi issues recall of House, citing electoral safety concerns
Obama's lack of cojones a bold-face lie: proof
Elton John Working On Anti-Obama Musical
Congress ceases Pentagon spending, outsources armed forces to China
Shirley Sherrod accepts apology, gets new gov't job in End of Life Counseling
On first visit as Britain's PM, David Cameron chooses a communist state, seeks détente
Report: President Obama to visit the United States in the near future
GOP challengers promise post-racial presidency after 2012
Doctors: Glenn Beck's worsening eyesight and inability to focus give hope he may yet join other media and follow Obama
Parachuting donkey lands into Vice President's desk, continues business as usual
Obama calls on radical groups to comply with rules for radicals
NAACP condemns racism within al Qaeda: 'We don't have a problem with radicals, we have an issue with their acceptance of white Arab supremacists into their organizations'
Obama denies al-Qaeda stimulus money, redirects funds to 'less racist' man-made disaster management organizations
In view of lasting heat wave, all weather forecasts are temporarily replaced with 'An Inconvenient Truth' infomercials
NAACP strongly denounces The New Black Panthers
Caught in another hateful rant, Mel Gibson apologizes to representatives of hurt communities: Russian mail-order bride community, silicone breast-implant community, slutty clothes designer community, Vegas whore community, rapist community, and personally to Al Sharpton
Europe: Oracle Octopus predicts World Cup winner;
USA: Oracle Dodo predicts economic growth
Today's box office: LeBron knixes New York in a suspense thriller The Field of Nightmares (Tax Them and They Won't Come)
In a last-ditch effort to get popular with Americans, Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan reveals she's a Russian spy, photoshops her face on Anna Chapman's nude photos, wins by a landslide
Portland Tribune to receive Pulitzer Prize for best investigative non-reporting of Al Gore's sexual public service blooper
War on Arizona turns to quagmire; Obama sets timetable on American withdrawal by 2011
MSNBC: Obama's firing McChrystal a positive move to bring long-awaited improvement in oil-spill-affected news coverage
Harry Reid changes name to John F Kennedy in last ditch effort to win re-election
White House spokesman Gibbs clarifies why President's answers to nation's problems seem surreal, bizarre and inappropriate, by comparing reporter's question to a purple polka-dotted people-eater riding a tricycle
Obama: green economy likely to transform America into a leading third world country of the new millennium
President taps Pay Czar for BP payouts to victims: Unions order freighter of champagne
EPA: New climate bill will cost less than a postage stamp a day to those still able to afford a postage stamp
Helen Thomas Gets "Rachel Corrie Golden Bulldozer Award"
Puzzled media: Apparently, Al Gore is pro-drill
Gay Pride parade in Gaza cancels inclusion of Israeli group
Obama blames Bush for screwing up his 'Don't Make Excuses' grad speech in Kalamazoo, Michigan
Helen Thomas to leave US for ancestral Lebanon to no longer be occupier of La Raza's Land
Following phrase scheduled to appear on every Sunday morning news show: 'What Helen actually ment to say was...'
Helen Thomas to be inducted into Museum of Natural History
Obama's Deficit Reduction Commission operating in the red
Al Gore: It's a shame that a family can be torn apart by something as simple as a pack of polar bears
Democrats introduce bill regulating who can be a politician
BP hires Gaza flotilla peace activists to beat oil back into hole
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