Comrades, I need your help! I don't know what to think of this (as we all know, I try never to think in the first place). It seems that our Chinese Communist Party has outlawed our Chosen One, may the Obama be forever praised, the pass time he has enjoyed for his time of putting up with Rethuglikkkan opposition - his love for golf!

Sex, gluttony and golf: Chinese Communist Party's deadly sins

The ruling party's Political Bureau adopted new rules on clean governance and discipline earlier this month, the official Xinhua news agency said, describing the measures as "a moral ethical code that members must abide by".

Party members were already barred from "keeping paramours and conducting adultery" but the new rule on sexual activity was stricter, Xinhua said.

I can understand the first two sins against the Party:

We can't have anything separating the Collective from our image of Dear Leader Mao! These two should be sent to a re-education camp, putting them-Selfies as more important than Mao himself!

And this poor comrade - being told to deliver free noodles in such LARGE BOWLS!

And look how this comrade is eating his free noodles in public - without sharing!

Playing golf and excessive eating and drinking were explicitly listed as violations of discipline for the first time, it added.

The regulations - which apply to everyone in the 88-million-strong Communist Party - also forbid forming cliques within the party and nepotism.

Again, I understand the excessive eating and drinking and the sex thing - but GOLF??? What is Dear Leader Obama going to do?

I am so confused by all this, that I want to eat several pounds of free government cheese (but then again, I'm still being re-educated from eating so much party cheese so they put me on restriction).

Your assistance in this matter to think for me would be greatly appreciated!

Of course they're banning Golf! It lowers the production of Glorious High-Quality Chinese-Made Goods! But, Glorious Dear Leader can shift the laws of time and space, allowing him and all of us to play golf and still keep production at record rates. China has already been revolutionized, we can disregard it. But, the USSA still has more Revolution to go before we can move onto the Moon as our new Revolutionary target.

And mous, there's an easy way to make Party cheese. Fill an old hydraulic oil bucket up with milk, shred one Communist Manifesto into it, let it sit a while (if it stinks that means it's working), and after a couple weeks (or until the flies start breeding in it) it's ready. To serve, simply mix in a good amount (judge for yourself) of vinegar, put the bucket on the supper table, and throw in a few lengths of used fuel line so that everybody can suck as much as they want from the bucket ( the DIY version is really runny; if you wanna make your cheese hard like the government cheese, just put it in the freezer for a day or two). To make the spicy variety that's being tested in Detroit and Chicago simply add a shredded Soviet Constitution halfway through the aging process.

Red Walrus wrote:

chinese girl golf.jpg

Thank you, Red! THIS I understand! Like the sign someone keeps putting over my mouse hole...