Attention all Cubists:

Now that Comrade Red Square has finally (after 22 years) obtained US citizenship and a passport, he can legally cross the border without a disguise. His first foreign operation is going to be a reconnaissance mission to the Motherland. The trip is to gloriously commence tomorrow (Tuesday) and will successfully end on the third next Tuesday after that, immediately following the proletarian holiday code-named "Labor Day."

All Cubists must remain in their cubicles until further notice. Instructions will follow. Reports about the mission may or may not appear regularly, pending a reliable connection, classified nature of the findings, and the amounts of beet vodka consumed.

Mission objectives may or may not include:

1. Verifying the alleged link between Donald Trump and the Russian hackers, the FSB, KGB, GRU, and VVP (Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin).
2. Promotion, manufacturing, and distribution of tinfoil hats as the most reliable means of communication with Laika the Space Dog - Friend of People and Worldwide Community Organizer.
3. Preemptively establishing the cult of Hillary in the Motherland, complete with mass media infiltration, coercion, indoctrination, bribery, and blackmail.
4. Spontaneous active measures: random acts of sabotage, subversion, subterfuge, recruitment, and general mayhem.
5. Shopping.

In the meantime, feel free to post your own wish lists for Comrade Red Square to consider.

Cube Commissars are responsible for maintaining order, equality, and visual justice.

END OF TRANSMISSION

 

Red Square

Attention all Cubists:

Now that Comrade Red Square has finally (after 22 years) obtained US citizenship and a passport, he can legally cross the border without a disguise. His first foreign operation is going to be a reconnaissance mission to the Motherland. The trip is to gloriously commence tomorrow (Tuesday) and will successfully end on the third next Tuesday after that, immediately following the proletarian holiday code-named "Labor Day."

All Cubists must remain in their cubicles until further notice. Instructions will follow. Reports about the mission may or may not appear regularly, pending a reliable connection, classified nature of the findings, and the amounts of beet vodka consumed.

Mission objectives may or may not include:

1. Verifying the alleged link between Donald Trump and the Russian hackers, the FSB, KGB, GRU, and VVP (Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin).
2. Promotion, manufacturing, and distribution of tinfoil hats as the most reliable means of communication with Laika the Space Dog - Friend of People and Worldwide Community Organizer.
3. Preemptively establishing the cult of Hillary in the Motherland, complete with mass media infiltration, coercion, indoctrination, bribery, and blackmail.
4. Spontaneous active measures: random acts of sabotage, subversion, subterfuge, recruitment, and general mayhem.
5. Shopping.

In the meantime, feel free to post your own wish lists for Comrade Red Square to consider.

Cube Commissars are responsible for maintaining order, equality, and visual justice.

END OF TRANSMISSION

Comrade Leader,

I keep getting ads for these and am curious - Please bring back a few dozen if you have a chance.


Have a good journey!
CC
 

 

22 years for citizenship?

Had you added a suffix of "-io" to your first name, and "-ez" to your last name you'd have been a citizen in weeks.

Will the lovely Mrs Square accompany you, or will she remain here to raise ransom? I vote (early and often) that we put comrade Krasnodar in charge during the absence of the People's Director...

<off>

The Party's timing is perfect as always, now is your time. Safe travels, comrade; and best wishes on getting out through TSA, and then back into this country.
 

Captain Craptek

Comrade Leader,

I keep getting ads for these and am curious - Please bring back a few dozen if you have a chance.Russian-Girls.JPG

Have a good journey!
CC

I have gotten ads for them too. They arouse my prurient interests. I would like 50-75 of them, preferably with C-cups or less. Big knobs just get in the way and increase the cheatability quotient. Furthermore, I'd like 50 AK-47's, 100 Mags, 100 spam cans full of that old steel-case Soviet ammunition, a new Ushanka, a hammer, a sickle, and 500 litres of Stolichnaya. if you go visit Lenin in his mausoleum, please try to get a tuft of hair off of him for me, and please tell him that I am constantly working to lift up both him and Soviet Communism. Please send the good in a wood crate via certified and insured mail.
 

Why Comrade Red Square wish to see Bears on Unicycles?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSi9sj16vVw
 

щасливої ​​дороги , товарищ. If you haven't been mentioned in Hillary's emails, there is a good chance you'll come home safely - we'll keep our fingers crossed.
 

Can you bring back some of those 30 foot tall statues of Lenin? We need something politically correct to place in the spots where Confederate War memorials have been recently removed.



 

Glory be to the Armen-Banderovtsi world-wide!
 

.
Vnimaniye ! Motherland got a bit windy over those 22+ years !


 

Red Square

... feel free to post your own wish lists for Comrade Red Square to consider.
Once landed in Motherland and thusly free of the chains put on you by Imperialistik KKKapitalism, use your powers of grafichyeskiy propagandchik and restitute Great Vladimir Pride again — from Lviv to Vladivostok :



 

Comrade Red Square, have a safe and glorious trip! We'll miss you! If my, uh, "alter ego" is still on display, will you be recruiting him to vote for Hillary in November? Naturally, it is the korrekt thing to do.
 

 

Pamalinsky

korrekt, Komradette Pammie !
As there is neither a Kommissar Dzhugashvili nor a Kommissar Bronstein among our Kommissars, we can most equally trust them ! Ice picks to shovels !

P.S. I bet, Komradette Rosie (The Stakhanov-style Riveter) would be kinda jealous of your damn good looks. (though, of course, all Komradettes are fully equal.) .(and Rosie - a very foxy icon.)
 

Dear Red Square, my name is Ivan and I have been very equal this year and I want a genuine RED Rider BB gun with a red star on the stock and a picture of Vladimir Lenin engraved on the other side of the stock and my sister pinkie wants some mustache wax thanks your friend Ivan.
 

Dear Comrade Genosse,

Thank you for your kind words regarding my damn good looks. Thing is, I think the real Rosie would love what I did with her. We are kindred spirits.

Here’s something you don’t know. (but now will)

Several years ago I told Comrade Director how much eliminating the exclamation mark from my writing set me free. Just eliminating a simple mark really changed my writing immensely. He acknowledged this when I achieved my first (and only) Mother Page submission.

In this submission, I used the exclamation points as a graphic underline to let him know how much I appreciate him. He knows what I mean and, now, so do you.

Oh, and thanks for the Cube logo on my collar! How could I have forgotten that?
 

Comrade Red Square! Now that you have officially become official in this country - you now can help take control of this government! For the Motherland™!! And I promise I will stay in my cube - unless I'm at work gulag re-education center - I will remain in my cage cubicle.

I was so excited - I quickly posted this message on my social site regarding this notice:

SHHH - #Secret[b] transmission from our fearless leader! As he plans to infiltrate the #Soviet #MotherLand - this is #TopSecret - his last order is that all members of +The People's Cube remain in their cubes![/b]

I hope that's bit of propaganda advertisement is appropriate! If not, I can always modify it later after I get my afternoon nap so I can get back to the gulag center as ordered.
 

.
Glorious transmission, Comrades !
As Comrade Director appears right this moment in the exit of his Concordski, all Russia storms the tarmac and chants COME, COMRADE - TO US, TO OUR KOLKHOZ! :


(see the unbelievable crowds!!!)

Comrades! Despite most equal International Diversity and the Global Community near equally organized, this sounds a lot like the old, tired kkkapitalistic kkkompetition!

Can you feel it ? That "HERE, HERE, Comrade Red Square, OUR KOLKHOZ here better than THE PEOPLE’S CUBE over there! Stay WITH US!" ?

Comrades! We must triple- and quadruple down in our efforts to make THE PEOPLE’S CUBE the MOSTEST SHINY KOLKHOZ ON EARTH !!!



 

Genosse Dummkopf

.
Glorious transmission, Comrades !
As Comrade Director appears right this moment in the exit of his Concordski, all Russia storms the tarmac and chants COME, COMRADE - TO US, TO OUR KOLKHOZ! :


(see the unbelievable crowds!!!)

Comrades! Despite most equal International Diversity and the Global Community near equally organized, this sounds a lot like the old, tired kkkapitalistic kkkompetition!

Can you feel it ? That "HERE, HERE, Comrade Red Square, OUR KOLKHOZ here better than THE PEOPLE’S CUBE over there! Stay WITH US!" ?

Comrades! We must triple- and quadruple down in our efforts to make THE PEOPLE’S CUBE the MOSTEST SHINY KOLKHOZ ON EARTH !!!

LET ALL OF US FIGHT FOR 350% QUALITY
IN JUST HALF THE TIME OF THE CURRENT 5-YEAR PLAN !

Excellent thought - I offer the collective a hand tailored print of Comrade Dummkopf for appending to their important Cubic communications. It's a 50% enlargement of his humble self admonishing a group of non-conformists. As a bonus, it's been converted to PNG and cleaned up a bit for use on dark or light backgrounds. I seek no payment for its use - though a spare beet or two is always appreciated during holidays.



 

In Brussels, the first welcome - home march is being organised as we speak!



 

Captain Craptek

Genosse Dummkopf

LET ALL OF US FIGHT FOR 350% QUALITY
IN JUST HALF THE TIME OF THE CURRENT 5-YEAR PLAN !

... I offer the collective a hand tailored print of Comrade Dummkopf for appending ...
Comrade Craptek - most progressive Community Service you do here (of 350% quality, to boot).

This afternoon, when we come back from the fields and each of us is given his daily portion of вассерсуп (vassyerzup, which stems from Wassersuppe, which means a watery soup), I plan to share my portion with you. And I mean not just the upper watery layer, nay, I mean the very essence - the half inch kasha layer on bottom.


 

Genosse Dummkopf

Captain Craptek

Genosse Dummkopf

LET ALL OF US FIGHT FOR 350% QUALITY
IN JUST HALF THE TIME OF THE CURRENT 5-YEAR PLAN !

... I offer the collective a hand tailored print of Comrade Dummkopf for appending ...
Comrade Craptek - most progressive Community Service you do here (of 350% quality, to boot).

This afternoon, when we come back from the fields and each of us is given his daily portion of вассерсуп (vassyerzup, which stems from Wassersuppe, which means a watery soup), I plan to share my portion with you. And I mean not just the upper watery layer, nay, I mean the very essence - the half inch kasha layer on bottom.

The attachment вассерсуп_vassyerzup.jpg is no longer available

You will prepare the flavorful water soup in a garbage can I hope! Yes? I'm starving!


 

Captain Craptek

You will prepare the flavorful water soup in a garbage can I hope! Yes? I'm starving!
Nobody is more apt to inspect the current modus operandi of Cuisine de GULAG than Comrade RS:


So, according to Comrade Director’s ability :

Red Square

... feel free to post your own wish lists for Comrade Red Square to consider.we petition, according to our — and especially Captain Craptek's! — needs :

Please confirm, that vassyerzup Arôme de Goulag is nowadays brewed in ecologically korrekt garbage cans and thereby nutritionally enriched with a full environmentally recyclable bouquet of low-dioxide biodegradable compostibles.
 

So it goes without saying that much vodka will be unaccounted for in the old country, but did Red Square say he was going to make the big Beet Festival? I do so love the beet parades, and the crowning of Miss Teen Beet-Sprout (OK, just the swimsuit competition) and the festive ways of serving deep-fried beets on a stick, and the booths where you can Bob for Beets... or see the latest in tractor technologies!



I hope he doesn't spend his days at museums and theaters or such...
 

I'd like some war souvenirs.
(You didn't go over there to start some shit, did you?)


http://freebeacon.com/national-security ... r-ukraine/
 

Comrades:

Do not be tempted by Red Square's absence. Those beets and potato shavings belong to the collective and The Children.™


 

CubiLeaks from the MotherLand:



Vladimir Putin coached by Red Square on New World Order Cubed. Putin eyes Melania Trump while Donald Trump eyes Putin.

--KOOK
 

Un-distractible Vladimir Putin masses 40,000 troops and armored vehicles on Ukrainian border on 18 August 2016.


--KOOK
 

KOOK

Putin masses 40,000 troops and armored vehicles on Ukrainian border on 18 August 2016.
uh... official welcome party for Comrade Director? adequately - with military parade?
 

.
Glorious news, Comrades!
The Cube rolls through Russia - and Comrade Director at the very center of all that :




 

Captain Craptek

Comrade Leader,

I keep getting ads for these and am curious - Please bring back a few dozen if you have a chance.Russian-Girls.JPG

Have a good journey!
CC

Silly Romcade,

Don't you know there is a sure-fire way to get 72 of these all to yourself?

Happy hunting,
Komrade G(etc.)


Direktor Komrade Dearest,

I pray Lenin you have a safe and equally pleasant trip. But if they ask you to get on a train, please don't go.

I still think that when you return you should illegally cross over the border from Mexico at one of the voting... I mean, border crossings. You could double your voting equality! And then illegally cross over from Chicago, and then maybe Philly... Think of the possibilities!

With most equal scincerity,
Kadet Grendelssohnovovich
 

Grendelssohnovovich

I pray Lenin you have a safe and equally pleasant trip.

I will join you.
 

My wish list for Red Square? At first I thought of saying "Just bring back yourself," except that's not only hokey, but everyone else on this thread will accuse me of being a big suck-up. Or maybe they won't because they fear my shovel. Also, it might mean leaving Mrs. Red Square behind, and I'd rather you bring her back. So scratch the whole "Just bring back yourself" drivel.

Then I thought of asking you to bring back the first tree branch that brushes your shoulder on your journey, but since you left almost a week ago, that might require some serious backtracking on your part. Also, you might get busted at Customs for trying to transport flora/fauna that could destroy our eco-system, especially if there happened to be some exotic Russian bug on that branch. And even if you didn't get busted, after a while the branch would dry out and all the needles would fall off. So scratch the whole first tree branch request.

You can always bring me a special shovel I can use for smashing Betinov's jar and bashing his brains into borscht. BTW, he doesn't need a Red Ryder BB gun because he doesn't have an eye to put out.

But if you can't find such a shovel, then just bring me money. You can never go wrong giving money.

And pictures. I want to see lots of pictures.
 

Commissarka Pinkie

My wish list for Red Square? At first I thought of saying "Just bring back yourself," except that's not only hokey, but everyone else on this thread will accuse me of being a big suck-up. Or maybe they won't because they fear my shovel. Also, it might mean leaving Mrs. Red Square behind, and I'd rather you bring her back. So scratch the whole "Just bring back yourself" drivel.

Then I thought of asking you to bring back the first tree branch that brushes your shoulder on your journey, but since you left almost a week ago, that might require some serious backtracking on your part. Also, you might get busted at Customs for trying to transport flora/fauna that could destroy our eco-system, especially if there happened to be some exotic Russian bug on that branch. And even if you didn't get busted, after a while the branch would dry out and all the needles would fall off. So scratch the whole first tree branch request.

You can always bring me a special shovel I can use for smashing Betinov's jar and bashing his brains into borscht. BTW, he doesn't need a Red Ryder BB gun because he doesn't have an eye to put out.

But if you can't find such a shovel, then just bring me money. You can never go wrong giving money.

And pictures. I want to see lots of pictures.

Hi,

Me too... lots of pictures of those Russian girls who can't wait to contact me so I can pay their way over here so I can meet them before Ivan the S. does and, and... do stuff. Hurry back!

CC
 

Captain Craptek must be working a lot of overtime because he

...lots of pictures of those Russian girls who can't wait to contact me so I can pay their way over here so I can meet them before Ivan the S. does and, and... do stuff. Hurry back!

CC
.

 

Da, Comrades! My Our entire Beet Kollectiv has voted - UNANIMOUSLY! - to eagerly accommodate Every One of The Beautiful Russian Women who desire to join us in Our Comradely Living Accommodations!

(This vote was only held after a few some many of our female Kollecktivists had left for the Bright Lights (ptui!, ptui!) and Easy Living (ptui!, ptui!) in Downtown Austin - and abandoned their duties to Build The World Of Next Tuesday™.)

[P.S. Comrade Red Square: For the sake of your Apparatchik Unkulturny, please make sure that at least 2 or 3 of Our New Comrades have big tatas...]
 

 

Commissarka Pinkie

You can always bring me a special shovel I can use for smashing Betinov's jar and bashing his brains into borscht. BTW, he doesn't need a Red Ryder BB gun because he doesn't have an eye to put out.

And pictures. I want to see lots of pictures.

Bu-bu-but, Pinkie! Betinov already requested a couple tubes of mustache wax for you. How can you be so cruel?

Yeah, I wanna see lots of pictures, too. Lots. (Evidence!)
 

Is Red Square getting the "insider's" tour at that Lubyanka prison <cough> Spa and Rehab/Detox Resort?

I haven't' seen a note or a postcard, or even any account activity that I didn't do on his ration cards...
 

With Red Square gone, would that put Commissarka Pinkie in charge?
 

Ivan the Stakhanovets

Is Red Square getting the "insider's" tour at that Lubyanka prison <cough> Spa and Rehab/Detox Resort?

I haven't' seen a note or a postcard, or even any account activity that I didn't do on his ration cards...


Probably busy doing fun Russian vacation stuff..........................





or maybe he didn't take enough blat for good internet connection............



 

Clara Illbustyourballs Zetkin

or maybe he didn't take enough blat for good internet connection............




How dare you! Direktor always have enough cash for blat payment! Direktor so well-known he need no blat payment! People pay blat to him, that's how famous Direktor is! Plus, in glorious Rossiya, no time or copper for modem and telephone line! Internet in Rossiya come from glorious no-grid enviro-friendly Radio Teletype connection! And fax come to you via man on horse who give you yellow paper that say "Eastern Union" at top. Telephone call need telegraph line and man who can yell at telegraph key loud enough.
 

Comrades,

Laika provides world-wide access to the interwebs for the People's Direktor when travelling on State business. I understand there is a private server just for the email traffic...


 

Comrade Stierlitz

How dare you! Direktor always have enough cash for blat payment! Direktor so well-known he need no blat payment! People pay blat to him, that's how famous Direktor is! Plus, in glorious Rossiya, no time or copper for modem and telephone line! Internet in Rossiya come from glorious no-grid enviro-friendly Radio Teletype connection! And fax come to you via man on horse who give you yellow paper that say "Eastern Union" at top. Telephone call need telegraph line and man who can yell at telegraph key loud enough.

Calm down Comrade, don't get your кальсоны in a wad. It's been a couple of decades since Direktor went to motherland. I hope he packed enough extra 'non-cash' blat. Back in the day, it use to be things like American jeans and American cigarettes that would get you the services you needed. Like you want a taxi and you have American written all over you, they would just drive on by until you held up pack of cigarettes. Same as getting something to eat. Sit down in a restaurant and waitress ignore you til you whip out American jeans or cigarettes and lay them on the table. I don't know what 'non-cash' blat items are desired nowadays but without it he may be using one of these.............................................



 

Hillary’s Secret Kremlin Connection Is Quickly Unraveling



 

.
Red Square™ seems to have plenty of blat!

I hope he doesn't plan on giving away the kollective's only Elvis toupée!

How will Ivan the Stakhanovets entertain us on Elvis' birthday?!
.

 

If I took 2 full weeks away from the kollecktive, I don't think I'd travel to someplace where I had to stand in line to get my ration of beets. I can get that here at home.

Red's going to be behind on his quota, but who's going to get away with calling him on it?
 

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.
 

Red Square

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.

Direktor Square,

Let me be the first to welcome you back,.. and it's


 

Welcome back most Equal Dear Leader! Next time in Europe, visit Belgistan for a sampling of local Beers! All glory to the Kube!
 

Welcome Home Komrade.
 

Red Square

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.

Written to the melody of Beethoven's eternal "Ode to Joy". Pick a verse or sing them all. I don't know if the piece is long enough to sing them all, though.


Comrade Red, he crossed the border,
Ventured to Elysium!
Smuggled back goods from far places,
But we will see none of them.
Komissar, he helped the people,
Into revolution's light.
Kubism is in a new land,
May it have glory and might!

Lenin, he did raise the people,
Our movement had just begun!
Bourgeoisie thought they could crush us,
But they lost and we have won!
Stalin set us moving forward,
To horizons far removed.
Some say Communism can't work,
But this thought has been disproved!

Brothers, Sisters, let's all rise up,
Make the high class trip and fall!
We shall build a world that's equal,
Build a nation that's for all!
Justice that is for the people,
Shall not hear the rich man's plight.
Peace and freedom reign forever,
Steering us into the right!

United in endless struggle,
Workers, please throw off your chains!
Do not fear, for it's been done once,
And it will be done again!
Revolution's finest hour,
It is on the fact'ry line.
Make a world where all are equal,
Mine is yours and yours is mine!

Revolution picking up speed,
Dow Jones drops at record rates!
Old ways we do not desire,
We shall be the Soviet States!
Greatest nation in existence,
Rome and Russia intertwined.
Nowhere in our race's hist'ry,
Better nations you will find.

Motherland, my home country,
U-S-S-R is her name!
Some of us have not sprung from her,
But she loves us just the same!
Communism, mankind's triumph!
The lone lantern in the night.
Comrades, come and walk beside us,
Bask in its' eternal light!
 

Comrade Stierlitz

Red Square

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.

Written to the melody of Beethoven's eternal "Ode to Joy". Pick a verse or sing them all. I don't know if the piece is long enough to sing them all, though.


Loved it, Comrade Stierlitz! I know this tune and every stanza struck a chord with me!
Thanks for composing this. Wonderful!
 

Red Square

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.

Yaaaay! We missed you so much, dear Direktor! I must admit I was worried about you. I expressed this concern to my friend Ivan Betinov and he assured me that you would be fine.

Can't wait for your photographic essay on your journey, after being so long away from your home. I hope your family is OK. Bring them here if they want to come! I'll bet they are so proud of you. I know we are.
 

Minitrue

Welcome back most Equal Dear Leader! Next time in Europe, visit Belgistan for a sampling of local Beers! All glory to the Kube!
I'd love to! But you can now have Belgian beer in Kiev as well - read the sign on the umbrella - right next to "The Cossack Hotel."



And a couple of blocks down, there's also O'Brien's Irish Pub - that's what's written in Cyrillic over the windows.



 

On another note -

Medals, promotions, and increased rations await those who helped to mind the shop and kept an eye on the Cube while I was inspecting the local checkpoints and ammo!



 

So just exactly why was Red Square gone so long?

Stuck in traffic becomes a viable option...

Russian road safety experts employ topless women to hold speed limit signs

 

.
Red Square... you need a ball grip similar to the one Mr. Trump has!

Welcome home, sir!
.

 

Red Square

Minitrue

Welcome back most Equal Dear Leader! Next time in Europe, visit Belgistan for a sampling of local Beers! All glory to the Kube!
I'd love to! But you can now have Belgian beer in Kiev as well - read the sign on the umbrella - right next to "The Cossack Hotel."


And a couple of blocks down, there's also O'Brien's Irish Pub - that's what's written in Cyrillic over the windows.




I wonder, are those bars on the windows to keep criminals out when the pub is closed, or keep the Irish inside when it's open?
 

Captain Craptek

Red Square

Minitrue

Welcome back most Equal Dear Leader! Next time in Europe, visit Belgistan for a sampling of local Beers! All glory to the Kube!
I'd love to! But you can now have Belgian beer in Kiev as well - read the sign on the umbrella - right next to "The Cossack Hotel."


And a couple of blocks down, there's also O'Brien's Irish Pub - that's what's written in Cyrillic over the windows.

40342-Kiev_OBriens_Pub.jpg

I wonder, are those bars on the windows to keep criminals out when the pub is closed, or keep the Irish inside when it's open?

Most definitely to keep them in! They are an unruly bunch of drunks (it's in their blood. They even brag about this!) and cannot be trusted in the public domain or to be allowed to wander the streets, especially after visiting a pub. I know this first-hand because I'm 1/2 Irish and only do this 1/2 the time. So, I know a thing or two about Irish behaviour. (especially when they hang with Scandahoovians)

Don't ever trust them! Ever! Especially when they have interbred with Swedes and Norwegians. They are the worst! So many of them migrated to America and settled in states like Minnesota, Wisconsin and Chicago (IL, where I was born)! Take a good look at those states now! Nice, huh? They are human wrecking balls!
 

Hey Comrades! I just wanted to post some of the pics I shot while visiting Betinov.










You'll notice I care more about the camera shot than the actual target shot.

That's Show Bizz!
 

So Hoegaarden found its way to Kiev... I had to see it to believe it...
 

Quote:

....Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage. Report with pictures to follow.

You just keep those pictures of your Ukrainian sausage to yourself, pal.
 

Ah shopping. That's almost required if you're a tourist.
 

Congratulations on your citizenship!!
 

Red Square

... Comrade Red Square has finally (after 22 years) obtained US citizenship and a passport ...
".. after 22 years .." : that's what happens when you barrel into the dark bowels of KKKapitalism through JFK Intl, Greencard in hand, khyeavy Rushyan aktsyent in speak*. Had you (these days) just marched in across the Rio Grande while speaking, say, Wolof or Tigrinya (or Daesh), there would be no problemo.

* it vyery khyeavy to gyet lost Rushyan aktsyent, oy khyeavy.

Red Square

I'm back! Crossed the border last night, smuggling in vodka, some beets, and Ukrainian sausage ...
Huh, these were the ones we have been waiting for! samogon, buryaki, and kolbasy.
And this was the moment when the wise of The Kube began to grow, and our Kollektive began to squeal [as Comrade Director hopped down the stairs of his right this minute landed Concordski].