Comrades, I'm concerned. At roughly the same time, both Comrades May Putout and Captain Craptek disappeared, and not resulting from any conspiracy theory I initiated or repeated.

While their individual lists of crimes are both significant, I'm puzzled at the timing and duration of their absences. Did they get into a quarrel and both are pouting separately? Is there a Co-ed gulag somewhere she might be petting her squirrel? Who knows?

It is common for a comrade to become a non-person and disappear with little or no notice, but usually personal belongings are left in the pile at the train platform and there is at least a register of those "vacationing" in the east... nothing this trip.

If they don't show up soon, I'm ordering a re-printing of their ration cards, their bi-weekly proceeds going to the "common good" at Tractor Barn #2.

I'm Ivan. And I approve this message.

Wel, it is made known on top of the comment box that online hooliganism is a crime. Glad you caught the crime.

Red Square did mention something about squirrel collusion, but it looks like we perhaps didn't take his suggested possibility then, and now it may be too late…

I have indeed been missing these two. Perhaps they have gone underground and we should not ask too many questions. (Q: Do squirrels go underground? A: Only when they become moles.)

The People's Anthony Sullivan wrote:Wel, it is made known on top of the comment box that online hooliganism is a crime. Glad you caught the crime.

Red Square did mantion something about squirrel collusion, but it looks like we perhaps didn't take his suggested possibility then, and now it may be too late…

People's Andrew Sullivan are you suggesting that Putout and Craptek are in NoKo enjoying a nice bowl of rat bibimbap? As you clearly documented - Craptek actually has travel papers to enter NoKo detention facilities at will. I don't know about Putout's travel papers...but that chick has ways to work her will on others.

The tin foil ball won't stay on my receiver antlers...waiting for new sheet from Ivan Stakhanovets but that's going to require some number shifting on beet vodka production...and while that's underway. The point is that my transmissions from Laika haven't been received in full maximum bandwidth so info from our all-knowing Big Brother. That said, the First Law of Agitation requires that when cut off from contact with Current Truth - introduce conspiracy theories to act as Current Truth.

It is very ODD that they BOTH have been disappeared. Like Red Square and Ivan were talking about boob size and just ....crickets. ???? Something is up. Therefore, until we KNOW...conspiracy theories must suffice.

Comrades. Could it be that the couple could be vacationing incog in Mexico City at the Hostel Trotsky? Word at the barn is that they may have been airbrushed from the cube for crimes against the people. It pays to stay close to one's enemies, even if they may be your comrades.

The People's Anthony Sullivan wrote:Wel, it is made known on top of the comment box that online hooliganism is a crime. Glad you caught the crime.

Red Square did mention something about squirrel collusion, but it looks like we perhaps didn't take his suggested possibility then, and now it may be too late…

I have communicated with the Captain and he has his own reasons for not being amongst we few, we happy few, we band of brothers, at this time.

"Silence!" commanded the Captain. "Speak not of me here or anywhere. If Pelosi's spies discovered that you, Ivan the Stakhanovets, knew of the whereabouts of Craptain Captek, all would be lost. And her spies are everywhere. The Nine-Hundred Bill Riders are abroad again, and there are those who claim to have seen the Seven Santinis, the Six Danger Signs, and the entire faculty of Berkeley, including the gerbil. Even the walls have ears," he said pointing to two huge lobes prominently marked "CIA" which were protruding from behind the mantelpiece.

"Is there no hope?" gasped Ivan. "Is nowhere safe? Not even Texas?"

"Who can know?" said the Captain, and a shadow seemed to pass over his face. "I would say more," he said, "but a shadow seems to have passed over my face," and with that he fell strangely silent.

They're working for Cortez!

Lev Termen wrote:I have communicated with the Captain and he has his own reasons for not being amongst [highlight=#ffff00]we few, we happy few, we band of brothers, at this time.
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"Silence!" commanded the Captain. "Speak not of me here or anywhere. If Pelosi's spies discovered that you, Ivan the Stakhanovets, knew of the whereabouts of Craptain Captek, all would be lost. And her spies are everywhere. The Nine-Hundred Bill Riders are abroad again, and there are those who claim to have seen the Seven Santinis, the Six Danger Signs, and the entire faculty of Berkeley, including the gerbil. Even the walls have ears," he said pointing to two huge lobes prominently marked "CIA" which were protruding from behind the mantelpiece.

"Is there no hope?" gasped Ivan. "Is nowhere safe? Not even Texas?"

"Who can know?" said the Captain, and a shadow seemed to pass over his face. "I would say more," he said, "but a shadow seems to have passed over my face," and with that he fell strangely silent.

This is one of the most equal speeches I have ever heard:

This quote from Shakespeare begins at 2:18.