Image

New Clinton update to fix bug patches, authenticity plugins

User avatar
[img]/images/Clinton_OS_Person_of_Interest.jpg[/img]

Democratic Party strategists will be pleased to know that the new update to ClintonOS is slated to be released before the start of the first CNN debate. The news comes as a sigh of relief for the number of users who were worried about vulnerabilities in the previous version, which included numerous freezing issues when accessing accomplishment memory and making unfunny jokes that not even grandma would be stupid enough to crack.

Over a third of the fixes found in the new update apply to speech and facial articulation software, filtering out a number of accent and expression libraries and replacing them with a simplified Linguistic Adaptation Methodology Emulator (LAME) that can instantly identify with a number of Officially Oppressed Groups™ both real and imagined. Also included in the update are fixes to the Clinton Laugh System, which has been previously noted to have issues such as stuttering and unnaturally long load times.

"We really hope that this new update will help young voters identify with a candidate who hasn't touched a steering wheel since before they were born." Said Tamara Tulatte, Senior Software Manager for the Clinton campaign. "The new Clinton will be more real, more genuine, and more future oriented, we've learned to stop looking in the past in order to solve any gaps in credibility... I think."

However, many users are still skeptical of what Clinton has to offer. Some have abandoned her in favor SanderSYS and many are looking forward to the possibility of an open source Biden.

User avatar
Please tell me it has x64 alcohol processing algorithms...

User avatar
Two hours of download time wasted! It's stuffed with fund raising pop-ups and pant-suit ads plus I can't get the Cackle Sampler to work. This sucks!

User avatar
Captain Craptek wrote:Two hours of download time wasted! It's stuffed with fund raising pop-ups and pant-suit ads plus I can't get the Cackle Sampler to work. This sucks!

Did you try the two-bit version?

User avatar
Comrade Sovremennyy wrote:
Captain Craptek wrote:Two hours of download time wasted! It's stuffed with fund raising pop-ups and pant-suit ads plus I can't get the Cackle Sampler to work. This sucks!

Did you try the two-bit version?

I called the Tech Help line and was put on hold for over 7 hours before somebody named Huma came on the line and hung up on me! The bitch! This OS can't suck enough!


 
POST REPLY