[img]/images/Santa_Occasio_Cortez_Ticket.jpg[/img]

Comrades!

Our beloved Socialist Democrat party is in for a winning streak! Demographic projections have elucidated that somewhere within the coming 5 years the Mechanized Migrant Divisions will be able to flip some important red states. First we take Austin, then we take Tallahassee. Meanwhile the Airborne Muslim Brigade continues its march through Minnesota. So the good news is that by 2024 Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez will become the first empress of Mexamerica.

This means that by 2025 we will be able to raise income taxes to 99%. The problem is that the USA (spit, spit) will still be a pretty rich country when we start destroying it. Even our advisors from Cuba, Venezuela and North Korea have no clue how we can distribute that amount of wealth to each according to their needs until nothing is left.

We have sent operatives to the far corners of the earth, looking for someone with sufficient know-how and experience in giving away endless amounts of free stuff. It was no easy task, but we have prevailed. So it is in a spirit of jubilation that I can officially announce the 2024 ticket to be Santa Claus / Ocasio Cortez. No one but Santa with his magical powers will be able to convert all of America's accumulated capital into toys and freebies for the toiling masses.

Already we are establishing re-education camps where elves will learn all about their white privilege. Santa's sleigh is being refurbished into a completely carbon-neutral vehicle. The reindeer have been slaughtered to prevent methane-containing flatulence. Regulations are being drafted to force citizens to widen their chimneys, so the government can have unobstructed 24/7 access to the living rooms of its subjects.

Red Santa is rising, comrades. Soon, it will be Christmas all year long. Everyone will be very happy with whatever freebies our dear leader Santa will give us. Forever. And ever. And ever. Ho, Ho, Ho.

Minitrue

I was going to say something about making sure that the reindeer were "diverse" -- you know, a certain number gay, some lesbian, a transgendered one or two --

But I see that you took care of that!

Minitrue wrote:The reindeer have been slaughtered to prevent methane-containing flatulence.

Hey, if Comrade Stalin (PBUH) can slaughter fifty million, then what's a dozen or so?

You know, I've been hearing our Communist friends saying for years that "If we could just find the right leader, Communism would work!" Well, perhaps Santa ☭laus (he of the Red suit) is the right leader! I for one am excited.

Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:I was going to say something about making sure that the reindeer were "diverse" -- you know, a certain number gay, some lesbian, a transgendered one or two --

But I see that you took care of that!

Minitrue wrote:The reindeer have been slaughtered to prevent methane-containing flatulence.

Hey, if Comrade Stalin (PBUH) can slaughter fifty million, then what's a dozen or so?

You know, I've been hearing our Communist friends saying for years that "If we could just find the right leader, Communism would work!" Well, perhaps Santa ☭laus (he of the Red suit) is the right leader! I for one am excited.

ML,

With names like Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen & Rudolph I don't think diversity was an issue and no need for concern.

There is a concern, however, on where and how those slaughtered reindeer are hanging to drain. I see much jerky in the kollective's future.

No wonder Santa always wears so much Red. I too am excited at this prospect for 2020.

Clara Illbustyourballs Zetkin wrote:There is a concern, however, on where and how those slaughtered reindeer are hanging to drain.

I believe the slaughter of Santa's reindeer was halal-compliant, as per strict Sharia rules and regulations.

Red Square wrote:I believe the slaughter of Santa's reindeer was halal-compliant, as per strict Sharia rules and regulations.

I don't know about all that Komrade Direcktor. The more I see of Sharia rules and regulations the more non-compliant it seems to be with my FemiNazi values. However, I do know poor field dressing can sure muck up some good jerky.

Thank you all for your constructive comments! And do not worry, comrade Lysenkomann, there will be plenty of forced diversity in Santa Claus' realm!

The people who will bring the gifts to your hose through the always-open chimney system (curated by the NSA) will come from a whole variety of backgrounds. You cannot imagine what kind of diverse fun they will have. And it will not stop there.

We will make sure young boys only get princess dolls (to emasculate this demographic stratum), and young girls will get My First People's Cube Abortion Kit Play Sets ™.

Clara Illbustyourballs Zetkin wrote:

Red Square wrote:I believe the slaughter of Santa's reindeer was halal-compliant, as per strict Sharia rules and regulations.

I don't know about all that Komrade Direcktor. The more I see of Sharia rules and regulations the more non-compliant it seems to be with my FemiNazi values. However, I do know poor field dressing can sure muck up some good jerky.

Comrade Zetkin, clearly you have suffered a major malfunction! Pointing out discrepancies between Sharia and Progressivism is Thoughtcrime ™. It is tone-deaf, or whatever word we invented for it.

Please repeat 200 times: "Islam belongs to America, America belongs to Islam". After a while, you will start believing it, if you really want to.

If you do not want to... the party will provide help in wanting it. Do you like cold and snow? Take care!

A concerned fellow prog,Comrade Minitrue

Minitrue wrote:
Comrades!
.
<snip>
.
Already we are establishing re-education camps where elves will learn all about their white privilege. Santa's sleigh is being refurbished into a completely carbon-neutral vehicle. The reindeer have been slaughtered to prevent methane-containing flatulence. [highlight=#ffff00]Regulations are being drafted to force citizens to widen their chimneys, so the government can have unobstructed 24/7 access to the living rooms of its subjects.[/highlight]

Red Santa is rising, comrades. Soon, it will be Christmas all year long. Everyone will be very happy with whatever freebies our dear leader Santa will give us. Forever. And ever. And ever. Ho, Ho, Ho.

Minitrue

Comrade M,

I must remind you that Special Abled Service Squirrels require motorized lifts to comfortably travel in brick chimneys. In addition, (for safety reasons only) a reasonable supply of nourishment must be available in case of stranding due to lift malfunction. Nourishment includes, but is not limited to, a variety of shelled nuts and beet liqueur.

You must submit a copy (in quadruplicate) of your proposed "chimney widening" plans and all specification directives for approval before proceeding. Send everything to me at: The Bureau of Special Animal Rights Privileges - Arboreal Division. (BSAP-AD)

C. Craptek, P.E.
.

Dear comrade K,

Thank you for bringing this to our attention. The "Chimney Widening Act" of 2025 will include the creation of a Federal Bureau of Chimney Installation Adjustments (FBCIA). We will hire thousands, nay, millions of civil servants to enforce the rules. Every single chimney will be held to very specific high standards. I guarantee that, once we are done with this "country", chimneys will be the only place people consider living in.

They will be outfitted - every individual chimney, that is - with seperate elevators for not only disabled squirrels, but also for transgender disabled squirrels. We will oblige chimney owners to have a veterinarion on standby 24/7 to tend to these vulnerable critters. You cannot imagine the paperwork - it makes me salivate!

Cordially,
Comrade M.

Minitrue wrote:Comrade Zetkin, clearly you have suffered a major malfunction! Pointing out discrepancies between Sharia and Progressivism is Thoughtcrime ™. It is tone-deaf, or whatever word we invented for it.

Please repeat 200 times: "Islam belongs to America, America belongs to Islam". After a while, you will start believing it, if you really want to.

If you do not want to... the party will provide help in wanting it. Do you like cold and snow? Take care!

A concerned fellow prog,Comrade Minitrue

Komrade Minitrue, not every Feminazi has exchanged common sense and self-preservation for a pussy hat. Do I like cold and snow? Not particularly but it does sound preferable to the thought of being a Cro-Magnon among a clan of knuckle dragging Neanderthals. Remember, there is no bad weather, just bad clothing. A new wardrobe made from reindeer pelts should do the trick and I will be ready for the Polar Express to Red Santa Land.

Minitrue wrote:Dear comrade K,

Thank you for bringing this to our attention. The "Chimney Widening Act" of 2025 will include the creation of a Federal Bureau of Chimney Installation Adjustments (FBCIA). We will hire thousands, nay, millions of civil servants to enforce the rules. Every single chimney will be held to very specific high standards. I guarantee that, once we are done with this "country", chimneys will be the only place people consider living in.

They will be outfitted - every individual chimney, that is - with seperate elevators for not only disabled squirrels, but also for transgender disabled squirrels. We will oblige chimney owners to have a veterinarion on standby 24/7 to tend to these vulnerable critters. You cannot imagine the paperwork - it makes me salivate!

Cordially,
Comrade M.

P.S. - Emergency overnight accommodations (for two) half way down the shaft would be a nice touch,.. just a thought, no rush...

.

The scrumptious [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] wrote:
Comrade M,

I must remind you that Special Abled Service Squirrels require motorized lifts to comfortably travel in brick chimneys. In addition, (for safety reasons only) a reasonable supply of nourishment must be available in case of stranding due to lift malfunction. Nourishment includes, but is not limited to, a variety of shelled nuts and beet liqueur.

.
Speaking of nourishment, Captain Craptek...
.
I'll never forget this episode of Hell's Kitchen!
(Let it be known that I DO NOT approve of this culinary delight!)
.

To curvaceous [color=#C0392B]Comrade Putout[/color] wrote:.

The scrumptious [color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] wrote:
Comrade M,

I must remind you that Special Abled Service Squirrels require motorized lifts to comfortably travel in brick chimneys. In addition, (for safety reasons only) a reasonable supply of nourishment must be available in case of stranding due to lift malfunction. Nourishment includes, but is not limited to, a variety of shelled nuts and beet liqueur.

.
Speaking of nourishment, Captain Craptek...
.
[highlight=#ffff00]I'll never forget this episode[/highlight] of Hell's Kitchen!
(Let it be known that I DO NOT approve of this culinary delight!)
.

.

Comrades before "ho"s!

Margaritas ante porcos!