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I Have Returned!

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Comrades! Noble members of the Regressive Progressive Left! I have returned after some years of being utterly depressed at how life and The Cube were one and the same. Anyway, I'm back. We can write the current truth as to why later. After all, there is always time to revise and rewrite the past. have been studying underwater basket weaving and postmodern intersectional social justiceUS History at The Evergreen State College.

Don't laugh, I've found a few rational, academically honest professors am revelling in the heroic struggle for social justice and the oppression of conservative ideals. But enough of that. Much weird has been happening. I have many glorious tales to tell. But first, vodka.


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Such is the wonders of being the Commissar of Time. I was gone, but low and behold, I was here all the time!

The Current Truth(TM) will be edited to place me alongside any important Party functions as needful.

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Remember my shovel? Here's an important Party function for you, Colonel:


Image WHACK!!!

No editing required.

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As I mentioned on the colonel's other post, he thinks he has been gone to the Evergreen Realm for years, a land once perpetually covered in snow because of climate change. It was always winter, but there was never a solstice. He had to do battle with gun confiscating wolves and fight an evil queen with a hideous cackle that made stout-hearted men's ears bleed. Anyway, he prevailed and became the Beloved Dear Leader of the Land of Evergreen which took years on his time frame, but barely enough time to play another round of Katch the Kulak (maybe in the Party Bunker, maybe not) on our time frame.
Am I mostly right, Colonel?

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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
As I mentioned on the colonel's other post, he thinks he has been gone to the Evergreen Realm for years, a land once perpetually covered in snow because of climate change. It was always winter, but there was never a solstice. He had to do battle with gun confiscating wolves and fight an evil queen with a hideous cackle that made stout-hearted men's ears bleed. Anyway, he prevailed and became the Beloved Dear Leader of the Land of Evergreen which took years on his time frame, but barely enough time to play another round of Katch the Kulak (maybe in the Party Bunker, maybe not) on our time frame.
Am I mostly right, Colonel?
Your glorious historical revisionism is more or less factually correct Comrade al-Blogunov

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Remember my shovel? Here's an important Party function for you, Colonel:


Image WHACK!!!

No editing required.
This is why I now wear a helmet.

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Colonel 7.62 wrote:
Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
As I mentioned on the colonel's other post, he thinks he has been gone to the Evergreen Realm for years, a land once perpetually covered in snow because of climate change. It was always winter, but there was never a solstice. He had to do battle with gun confiscating wolves and fight an evil queen with a hideous cackle that made stout-hearted men's ears bleed. Anyway, he prevailed and became the Beloved Dear Leader of the Land of Evergreen which took years on his time frame, but barely enough time to play another round of Katch the Kulak (maybe in the Party Bunker, maybe not) on our time frame.
Am I mostly right, Colonel?
Your glorious historical revisionism is more or less factually correct Comrade al-Blogunov
Well, I had an abundance of anonymous sources, former and current officials, and sources close to Evergreen.
Congratulations, by the way.

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The last time I remember the Colonel being here he was a Cadet.

As Kermit the Frog says, "Time's fun when you're having flies..."



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Well, they finally let you out of prison. I hope you learned your lesson this time, commie.

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Welcome back from camp. I trust that if asked you could produce your participation awards.Image

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That FEMA camp looks more comfortable than dystopian novels describe them. I hope those wooden shacks are living quarters and not outhouses.

If they are outhouses, they are much too large and take up too much space. One needs just enough room to sit and not scrape their knees on the rough wooden walls. We do not want transgenders and cross dressers to ruin their burlap skirts by scraping them on the walls.

Come to be told what to think of it, if living quarters, they are still too large as it looks like three adults could comfortably lay side-by-side-by-side in them. People are in the FEMA camp to work and provide for the collective greater good of humanity not to be comfortable. The buildings need to be smaller to make more outdoor space for the long lines of people waiting for their day old bread, beets and warm recycled water.

The large speakers used to call the prisoners proles citizens to prayer is a nice touch. I would like to forwardtm my resume to be considered for any FEMA Camp Manager positions we might have open. I am very good at being told what to do and I do not ask questions.


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Is this a FEMA Camp Manager interview question?

Okay....ahem.....My FEMA camp would have outhouses so that men who identify as woman can pee sitting down, woman who identify as men can pee standing up and cis white men can pull the barrels and burn them. As for me, I just use the woods.

Ummmm....quick review aaaaaand yup, I'm good with my answer. Do I get the job?

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Ivan Betinov wrote:Your FEMA camp had outhouses? Fan-Cee!

They have lighting, but behold, there are fences instead of bridges. The director needs to understand we are an open society and not a Trump Wall society.

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Hammer and Loupe wrote:
Ivan Betinov wrote:Your FEMA camp had outhouses? Fan-Cee!

They have lighting, but behold, there are fences instead of bridges. The director needs to understand we are an open society and not a Trump Wall society.
Komrade H & L, I think some clarification is in order. The fence, like the Berlin Wall in happier days, is there for the protection of the people. Fences keep Tr*** supporters out where they won't contaminate the pure thoughts being daily broadcast over the loudspeaker system with mindless babble about liberty and prosperity. And by "out" we mean "in" like the guy in Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy who built his house inside out so he could shut the world indoors and go outside for peace and quiet. Likewise, we keep Tr*** supporters out (in) by keeping them dispersed (contained) from the rest of society. It's all perfectly clear to anyone who's had a Jiffy-Lobo. Most of all, it's Better™.


 
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