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Global Warming is caused by 'The Sandwich'

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[img]/images/various_uploads/Sandwiches_Polluters.jpg[/img]

In 1762, or so the story goes, John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich rocked the culinary world when he couldn't be bothered to leave the gambling table to eat and ordered the servants to just stick some meat between two slices of bread for him.

John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich.jpg

New research shows that Global Warming is actually caused by the sandwich! Yes, the new research show that Global Warming actually started in 1762 and was caused by John Montagu's creation.

From Science Direct:

Sandwiches are ubiquitous food items and yet little is known about their environmental impacts. This paper focused on their impact on climate change and estimated the carbon footprint of commercial and home-made sandwiches. The study also explored how the information on the carbon footprint could be combined with nutritional data to assist consumers in making more informed food choices. In total, 40 different recipes were considered, focusing on most popular consumer choices in the UK. The estimated impact from ready-made sandwiches ranges from 739 g CO2 eq. for egg & cress to 1441 g CO2 eq. for the bacon, sausage & egg option. The carbon footprint of the most popular homemade sandwich (ham & cheese) varies from 399–843 g CO2 eq. per sandwich, depending on the recipe.

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Now I am unsure if the Global Warming is caused by a plain uncooked cheese sandwich

Uncooked Cheese Sandwich.jpg

Or by a sandwich consisting of Meat BBQd over a wood fire for 12 hours with a side of grease-cooked French Fries.

BBQ Meat Sandwich with Fries.jpg

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Antonio Salazarinski wrote:In 1762, or so the story goes, John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich rocked the culinary world when he couldn't be bothered to leave the gambling table to eat and ordered the servants to just stick some meat between two slices of bread for him.

John Montagu, 4th Earl of Sandwich.jpg


New research shows that Global Warming is actually caused by the sandwich! Yes, the new research show that Global Warming actually started in 1762 and was caused by John Montagu's creation.

From Science Direct:

Sandwiches are ubiquitous food items and yet little is known about their environmental impacts. This paper focused on their impact on climate change and estimated the carbon footprint of commercial and home-made sandwiches. The study also explored how the information on the carbon footprint could be combined with nutritional data to assist consumers in making more informed food choices. In total, 40 different recipes were considered, focusing on most popular consumer choices in the UK. The estimated impact from ready-made sandwiches ranges from 739 g CO2 eq. for egg & cress to 1441 g CO2 eq. for the bacon, sausage & egg option. The carbon footprint of the most popular home-made sandwich (ham & cheese) varies from 399–843 g CO2 eq. per sandwich, depending on the recipe.


Woman with huge sandwich.jpg


Now I am unsure if the Global Warming is caused by a plain uncooked cheese sandwich

Uncooked Cheese Sandwich.jpg

Or by a sandwich consisting of Meat BBQ'd over a wood fire for 12-hours with a side of grease-cooked French Fries.

BBQ Meat Sandwich with Fries.jpg


Has Science Direct done a study to see what environmental impacts were caused by ........



?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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Antonio Salazarinski wrote:
New research shows that Global Warming is actually caused by the sandwich! Yes, the new research show that Global Warming actually started in 1762 and was caused by John Montagu's creation.

While your research is most equal, Comrade Salazarinski, I have happened across yet another cause for Anthropogenic Global Warming: paddling canoes and tying knots.

No, really! This comes from none other than our honored Fellow Traveler Bill Nyeski, the Science Guyski. In his manifesto on AGW, "Everything All at Once", Comrade Guyski relates how these activities with his Komsomol Troop when he was a member of the Lenin Youth, lead to the dreaded scourge we have with us today. Of course his explanation of how this linkage occured was so densely korrect that my poor powers of analysis were unable to follow it, however it must be right since it was attacked by two members of the so-called "science mainstream" (read the 2-star reviews).


Perhaps Comrade Lysenkoman can turn his awesome powers of insight and analysis to this and help me understand it.

- SK

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The science is settled.

Say Putout, bring me a global warming sammich and a Vodka, will ya, Comrade ?


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Komissar al-Blogunov wrote:
dino sandwich.jpg

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I thought that fast food in this case would be Roadrunner. Meep.

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I have suddenly discovered a new criminal threat in the food industry that is so horrendous it will be punishable by 6 months in jail and fines. It will create new jobs called STRAW POLICE.
(I swear you can't make this crap up.)

I can hear it now:

Question: "What are you in here for kid?"

Answer: "Handing out unsolicited straws."

This is a much more serious offense than hanging unsolicited posters on a college campus!
(You know who you are.)


New California Bill: Waiters Will Serve 6 Months In Prison For Handing Out ‘Unsolicited' Straws

https://www.westernjournal.com/new-californian-bill-waiters-will-serve-6-months-prison-handing-unsolicited-straws/?utm_source=Email&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=dailyam&utm_content=conservative-50

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Comrade Clara posted about the straws shortly before I got up, and finished editing my post, she gets the recognition and credit towards other people's money and ill-gotten gains for pushing the button first. Ivan.

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Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:Comrade Clara posted about the straws shortly before I got up, and finished editing my post, she gets the recognition and credit towards other people's money and ill-gotten gains for pushing the button first. Ivan.


Tsk, tsk, tsk, Comrade Ivan. I think you are letting inkorrect thinking overtake the ideology of the Glorious World of Next Tues. There is NO competition, there is NO singling out for special recognition, there is NO egos allowed, there is NO extra credit (unless you're talking extra Beet Vodka rations) ALLOWED in the G.W.O.N.T. .....It's against the rules everything being all equal and all. Your new thread is quite equal!

Do I need to get Gunnery Sgt. Hartman to read you the rules?



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Our own 'movie' star [color=#C0392B]Ivan the Stakhanovets[/color] wrote:The science is settled.

Say Putout, bring me a global warming sammich and a Vodka, will ya, Comrade ?
.
IVAN... YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.

...get that guy to make you a 'sammich!'
.

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Was not the Lion of the Senate, the late esteemed Ted Kennedy, most famous for making the waitress sandwich? And yet was he not also a foe of Global Warming? After all, did he not attempt to douse the flame in his car at Chappaquiddick?


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Sasha Lapochka wrote:What is carbon footprint of borscht?

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Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:The science is settled.

Say Putout, bring me a global warming sammich and a Vodka, will ya, Comrade ?

Don't do it, Ivan...


Forgo that sandwich for the Polar Bear children!

Polar Bear Cub1.jpg


Polar Bear Cub2.jpg

Polar Bear Cub3.jpg

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Comrade Putout wrote:
Our own 'movie' star [color=#C0392B]Ivan the Stakhanovets[/color] wrote:The science is settled.

Say Putout, bring me a global warming sammich and a Vodka, will ya, Comrade ?
.
IVAN... YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.

...get that guy to make you a 'sammich!'
.

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Putout, photo is Ivan's younger cousin, not Ivan. How I know this? No Vodka belly!

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Comrade Salazarinski,

Although settled science certainly warrants this attack on sandwiches as examples of human self-indulgences contributing to Global Warming, let's face it: Humans will NEVER give up "sandwiches." Thus, if we are to succeed in saving GAIA from anthropogenic assaults we must concentrate more on other forms of settled science that can enable the GAIA-protecting gynogens to incentivize GAIA-neglecting androgens to protect GAIA. What "other forms of settled science"? It has long been "settled science" that dairy-industry production of milk contributes to Global Warming far more than does human consumption of sandwiches. Dairy-cow flatulence emits massive quantities of methane, a smelly gas which has a much greater greenhouse effect than CO2.

Thus, settled science makes it imperative for GAIA-protecting gynogens to play a leading role in efforts to wean society from its post-infancy addiction to dairy milk. It's also settled science that they (unlike dairy cows) do not emit massive quantities of methane but (like dairy cows) can be lactational in a non-maternal state and that androgens' instinctive attraction to gynogens would quickly render androgens addicted to such gynogen lactations and thereby quickly wean society off dairy milk.

Fortunately for Mother Earth, Comrade Gore, who not only invented the internet but also invented "Settled Science," has brilliantly combined these two aspects of "Settled Science" regarding Global Warming and has produced a new, highly-instructive slide-show titled "Inconvenient Cows Eclipsed by Convenient Gynogens." Because the slide-show may use more band-width than a mere prog should be allowed to appropriate from The People at The Peoples' Cube (and thereby anger Red Square and result in my being banished to one of his gulags), I have merely provided a "first frame" captured from the side show (see image immediately below) with a url-link to the slide show rather than embedding it here. I hope this keeps me out of trouble.

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--Kagan Gourmet


 
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