The Directorate for Legislator Supervision issued a report to the Commission for Progressive Governance of the Party’s Central Committee congratulating the Party for setting the new record in fast bill-voting. The People’s Senate voted unanimously* for Comrade President Barack Barackovich’s fiscal bill in only three minutes from receiving it. Clearly, the People’s Senators understand Party discipline and the need for a rapid response to social emergencies, rather than long discussion!
The Party has already developed a long-term plan to punish the Bourgeoisie through increased taxation, which we all know is only a tiny sliver of the overall financial needs of the State. Rather, the Five Year Plan of the Party calls for the additional production of Treasury Bonds and People’s Dollars rather rationing of entitlements and other expenditures for the benefit of the People. These new taxes will also help the Party’s goal of Kulak Elimination, preventing abusers from emerging from the Masses to by acquiring the means of production through profiteering.
By controlling this acquisition of the means of production, the Party ensures that all people can remain equal under the governance of the State and its industries. Comrade President Barack Barackovich has included a great number of investments in State-governed enterprises through subsidies and ‘tax-breaks’ (these are subsidies, as the Party pays the fair share of these industries that are owed to the People).
The Party is sure to be pleased that the American public has progressed to the stage where acceptance of the De-Kulakization plan of the Party’s Progressive platform is going on without opposition. While the Party has pledges to defend the Serednyak, or Middle Class, we know that there are retrograde and even counter-revolutionary elements are hiding in their midst and need to be purged through further redistributional collectivization.
Comrade President Barack Barackovich has pledged to increase collectivization efforts during the upcoming ‘Debt Ceiling’ activity in the People’s Congress. As we all know, collectivization begins with all citizens sharing not only in the collective ownership of the means of production, but the redistribution of wealth through the equal distribution of debt.
The People have voted, the People have spoken!
The People voted for Comrade Barack Barackovich, and Barack Barackovich speaks for them!
Faithfully submitted to the Collective of the People’s Cube,
*Due to malfunctions in the voting equipment, the official record indicates some ‘nay’ votes, but the Party assures the Masses that these votes did not actually happen and that the vote was unanimous.
The People voted for Comrade Barack and Comrade Barack speaks for them! Do not delay the inevitable! Accelerate bill-voting in Congress!
Celebrate the glorious anniversary of kulak deportations in the USSR with a speedy de-kulakization of Amerikan Motherland!
Your inspirational and agitational posters shine with the bright light of Progressive Socialism in Amerika!
Yes, we can... and we will!
Out with the Kulaks!
This good comrade is a professor of constitutional law at Georgetown University, and the author of the forthcoming book “On Constitutional Disobedience.”
I ask you, comrades - are we not blessed at this time in history to have men of his caliber fighting by our side in the Global Socialist Revolution? Ура, товарищи!