A new installment from Big Fur Hat, who now has his own site - https://iowntheworld.com

I dunno, euthanasia may be the best option for Media.

It would be a much needed change for Media to hump a donkey instead of the Amerikkkan people.

Opiate
I second that diagnosis

Zarkof
I wonder what that would look like. . .

Comrades, what is that Greek legend about the woman who can see nothing for looking at herself in the mirror?

Then we have Narcissus, who spent his time looking at his reflection in a pool. He fell in love with the beautiful youth he saw there, and then realizing that he was the youth, rent his clothes and died.

In today's world we have modern conveniences. The hacks spend their time in gadget stores, and the hackettes in leg-waxing salons. Then they meet at approved watering holes, or in front of a camera interviewing each other, in love with themselves.

Nice juicy portions of Fairness Doctrine will probably fatten Media the Lapdog. But then again, it might probably share the same fate of the Chow Hound:

Citizens,

I always thought the "media lap dog" Olberman, cleaned himself publically, because he don't know sh.t! Next thing you know, that hound will be humping Obama's leg and claiming it as an entertaimnent deduction on his taxes? Should we call in the "Jackass" wisperer to diagnose his condition?



Publius

We ought to take a collection for an Ativan implant.

Media The Lickspittle Lapdog has never been seen licking his balls....because he has none.

Polishing his brass balls, perhaps.

Publius Valerius wrote:Should we call in the "Jackass" whisperer to diagnose his condition?

Nice one.

But the question is, who is playing the role of the Lapdog Whisperer?

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Comrades, what is that Greek legend about the woman who can see nothing for looking at herself in the mirror?

Then we have Narcissus, who spent his time looking at his reflection in a pool. He fell in love with the beautiful youth he saw there, and then realizing that he was the youth, rent his clothes and died.

In today's world we have modern conveniences. The hacks spend their time in gadget stores, and the hackettes in leg-waxing salons. Then they meet at approved watering holes, or in front of a camera interviewing each other, in love with themselves.

Vanitiy, it all leads back to hubris.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Polishing his brass balls, perhaps.

(off)
There's an image I could live without.

I wish I had a copy of photoshop available. What I could do with this! See picture at
http://www.popsci.com/scitech/article/2 ... ul-kissing

I'd like to have pasted it in, but that capability is firewalled here. The article kind of goes with Michelle's "drool bucket", too.

Speaking of media, what does the Party think of the recent NY Post cartoon? Should not Al Sharpton and his fellow Party-members (even the uninitiated among them) burn cars and bomb "western interests" the same way Mohammed-followers reacted to the cartoons disrespectful to their prophet?

Mi,
Excellent coverage on that in the WSJ by Taranto in "Best of the Web" on 2/20:

All that notwithstanding, some will say that Delonas should have known better. We see their point, and we remember thinking a couple of years ago, upon seeing the umpteenth simian caricature of George W. Bush ... that nobody had better do that if Sen. Obama becomes president. We were aware that that would constitute an invidious stereotype, in a way that it did not when the president was a person of pallor.

But what if someone is unaware of this? Suppose that a columnist or cartoonist is so innocent of racial prejudice that he has never even thought to make a connection between black people and lower primates? Such a person would be a racial kerfuffle waiting to happen. The moment he inadvertently employed an idea or image that carried offensive connotations, he would be pilloried as "insensitive."

Consider the paradox: Racial "sensitivity" requires not eradicating racial stereotypes but keeping them alive--and not only keeping them alive but remaining acutely conscious of them at all times. Delonas and his editors are under attack for seeing "chimp" and failing to think "black guy." Perhaps this is an editorial failing, but it is certainly not a moral one.

This means that we can squeeze the proles for doing or not doing, saying or not saying, thinking or not thinking, writing or not writing ANYTHING! Oops wait... I'm a prole. Oh dang.

The Shoveler wrote: Consider the paradox: Racial "sensitivity" requires not eradicating racial stereotypes but keeping them alive--and not only keeping them alive but remaining acutely conscious of them at all times. Delonas and his editors are under attack for seeing "chimp" and failing to think "black guy." Perhaps this is an editorial failing, but it is certainly not a moral one.

This means that we can squeeze the proles for doing or not doing, saying or not saying, thinking or not thinking, writing or not writing ANYTHING! Oops wait... I'm a prole. Oh dang.

Comrade Shoveler-

There is no paradox nor moral failure; that is simply the PeopleSpeak definition of sensitivity. However, it would seem you have hit on one of the 5 Pillars of the Party in your last paragraph. Do as I say, not as I do is another. And you are indeed a prole! Now get back to the beets lest you find yourself on Platform 6 saying a teary-eyed goodbye to your non-gender specific spousal unit. Thinking is a Thought Crime, comrade.

Commissar Obamissar Vodkavich
Commissar of Obamissars, Gulags, and Car Wash Products
Not to be confused with The Criminally Insane Vodkov

With Media constantly licking his own ass, what did you expect??

Commisssar Obamissar V said:
>Now get back to the beets lest you find yourself on Platform 6 saying a teary-eyed goodbye to your non-gender specific spousal unit. Thinking is a Thought Crime, comrade.

No disrespect intended, your mightiness, but what are you going to do to me?

The Shoveler
12 Icepick Ln.
Dikson, Taymyrskiy, Rodina

PS It's really quite lovely here, if you like white. The sun started peeking over the horizon last week, and we see her now for most of the lunch break, when they have lunch to give. Beets? That would be lovely! (I don't know what was in that last borscht soup (cold of course), but it can't be beet!)

Ah, Comrade Shoveler... I appreciate your honesty in reporting the inequity in your assignment in Rodina. Lunch breaks are not authorized at that, or any of my other gulags. The occasional beet is to preserve the desire to work. I'll reward your honesty with a Holiday in Cambodia! That's right, Comrade. Report directly to Platform S-21 at the Hauptbahnhof. Bring shorts, flip-flops, and perhaps some bug spray, and your own WaterBoard.

Some of my deputy Obamissars in charge of individual gulags will be joining you, if not purged completely.

Commissar Obamissar Vodkavich
Commissar of Obamissars, Gulags, and Car Wash Products
Not to be confused with The Criminally Insane Vodkov

P.S. Report to the Karl Marx Treatment Center for a tutorial on how to use quotes in the WYSIWYG Rich Text & Poor Text Editor in accordance with Party Doctrine.

Commissar Obamissar V wrote:>Ah, Comrade Shoveler... (yada yada yada) I'll reward your honesty with a Holiday in Cambodia! That's right, Comrade. Report directly to Platform S-21 at the Hauptbahnhof. Bring shorts, flip-flops, and perhaps some bug spray, and your own WaterBoard.

What is "flip-flops"?

>P.S. Report to the Karl Marx Treatment Center for a tutorial on how to use quotes in the WYSIWYG Rich Text & Poor Text Editor in accordance with Party Doctrine.

We'll be able to use quotes correctly when you issue us a working computer. Our interface with the net at this time is based on the corrosion across the fender of a broken down harvester, wired to my vodka still. Ones and zeroes are read serially by the arcing between the still output pipe and the frog in the coffee can. His twitches are read as semaphore. Input is a curious effect of humming Ukranian folk songs in the vicinity of the connection at the fender. I was able to speed it up considerably by increasing the alcohol content of the still mash, but I couldn't hum fast enough to make use of it, and I was wearing out frogs too quickly. I've got her tuned back to 192 bps, but the others are complaining about the reduced still output (actual, vs. virtual). If you can't send us a computer, can you send us the makings of another still? All we really need is the 10 m or so of 1 cm lead tubing....

<P.S. Your Mother says "Hi", and "Are you coming for a visit soon?" She wants to make sure we put on the dog for you, but he's old, and tough, and will require several days of stewing. ::;

OMT: We're icebound till at least the 15th of June, and after that I'll have to walk about 2300 Km to get to the nearest train station, so you might want to review and perhaps revise the reservations you made for me in Cambodia. Sounds like fun and I'd hate to miss it!

Ah, Comrade Shoveler-

How appropriate that you identify yourself as a Guest of S-21. I trust you'll find your stay "invigorating". I'll ask the Director of Caring to assist you in making your stay more... comfortable?

I see, by your near-correct application of quotes that you were able to summon the services of what appeared to be a large frog, but obviously the frog was a though criminal as it had the nerve to twist the text of an Inner Party member. I feel your pain as the specifications you describe are hardly that of The People's Computer. You will find these somewhere in the esteemed annals of The People's Cube. At the moment, I'm tired of finding links for proles. Reading is part of your re-education and will make you a better Comrade. Report to me when you find it and I *might* commute your hardships, or perhaps send a true People's Computer. I do not, however, feel sorry for you as your needs were obviously determined to be less than those of other Comrades. If you had a MBP or something along those lines, someone else would not, so you should take peace in your poor situation as your losing enables someone else to win.

Flip-flops are known in The People's Progressive Collective of Hawaii, "birth place" of The One, as slippaz. In the PPC of Obama (left coast) they are known as thongs. In The People's Liberation Army they are known as shower shoes.

You would do well not to mention the ex-person formerly known as my mother. It was her proudest day when I turned her into the ACLU for Thought Crime, thus beginning my long road to The Party Elite. I show my love in the form of extra beets, not visits.

Now that we've dispensed with the formalities and civilities-

GET TO GROVELIN', PROLE!!! Think I care about the ice? You'd do best not to think. I don't give a single ounce of People's Tasty Creme what kind of conditions you have to travel through! When a Commissar says go, you GO! Either that or you hope your family can afford your 7.62 CEU ticket to freedom.

And a vodka still?? As if the Thought Crime weren't enough!!! Vodka can only be procured from the Proletariat Pimp PX. DDR Kamerad is the Commissar of the PPPX, and Milo Minderbinder is his humble servant. Commissar Red Star and his Highly Trained Troopers will be inbound soon to destroy your still, so don't get too worked up about the lead tubing.

Your only chance for redemption would be rigging up your computer to complete Laika's mission. Do it. Or else.

Yours in CHope,

Commissar Obamissar Vodkavich
Commissar of Obamissars, Gulags, and Car Wash Products
Not to be confused with The Criminally Insane Vodkov

Protip: Children singing songs to Lenin tend to have a better effect on navigating the software of the GoreWare IIe. See Below



If you don't have time to watch the whole thing because you have to get back to the beet field, skip ahead to 1:30 ish. Make sure to take note of the unwashed masses on those proles!

Comrades...
We all know we cannot stand for the Media to fall. The media is the microphone and the arm of our great socialist party and of the dear Leader, obama. The media , as we all know, is fair and balanced and expounds the glories of our great socialist cause exclusively.
If our great American mainstream media is negated or fails to convince the unwashed masses of the righteousness of our socialist agenda, then all we have lied for and cut-throats for.... is in danger of being erased.
This is why we need the 'Fairness Doctrine". We cannot survive the constant haranguing of a few right-wing radio personalities. Even though our outlets on television and in the newspapers outnumber them 20 to 1,....someone might take them seriously. We must have the undying worship of 100% of the masses.
One person armed with truth can kill us. Be vigilant.

sovietskayakaputnik wrote:Comrades...
We all know we cannot stand for the Media to fall. The media is the microphone and the arm of our great socialist party and of the dear Leader, obama. The media , as we all know, is fair and balanced and expounds the glories of our great socialist cause exclusively.

Comrade Sovietska-

While the content of you message is somewhat relevant, with your use of the phrase "Fair and Balanced," I begin to fear you have been viewing counter-revolutionary propaganda clearing house known as Faux News. Say it ain't so?!!

Titov-Kayak wrote:Nice juicy portions of Fairness Doctrine will probably fatten Media the Lapdog. But then again, it might probably share the same fate of the Chow Hound:

Well, it is about time that cat showed up with some gravy! What a clever Party dog that was, collecting CEU's from gullible capitalists. However, I was disturbed by that sign "liberal reward." as there was no program mentioned.

I'm sure that the One will not let Media fail. How would the Messiah get out the Party(tm) message, ( or cue his teleprompter), and allow the public to bask in his omipresent magnifigence?
Obamassiar,
LMSO - shower shoes....good one, comrade! Must go now....my Party-issued computer is playing games with my type.....BTW- Who is this useless appointee of the Obamessiah in charge of telecommunications and why are the Feds raiding his offices?? Doesn't anybody know what's going on in the One's Administration? Shit, they can't even get poor Comrade Geithner any help at the Treasury, and he's clueless without his TurboTax(tm) software!

Comrades!

Just today I found this wonderful media report on the media which claims Dear Leader's press secretary Robert Gibbs gave White House reporters a "strong A" Friday for their work during the first 100 days of the Obama Leadership!

- https://www.politico.com/news/stories/0409/21695.html

Hot Off The Wire!:

Obama has a visit from a Georgia farmer's delegation: They are introduced, they talk to Obama, and then they go, heading off down the White House's corridors. Obama starts looking for his cigarettes. He can't find them. He calls in Rahm Emannuel, the diabolical chief of staff.

“Go after the delegation, and find out which one took my cigarettes,” he says. Beria scuttles off down the corridor with 20 ACORN thugs in tow. Five minutes later Obama finds his cigarettes under a pile of papers. He calls Rahm Emmanuel—”Look, I've found my cigarettes.” “It's too late,” Rahm says, “half the delegation admitted they took your cigarettes, and the other half died during questioning.”